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August 2011 Moms
anwny18
member
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questions from FTM
anwny18
member
I am in need of some encouragement. Sometimes I feel like I know what I'm doing being a FTM but there are a lot of times where I have no clue. My own mother has passed and my MIL is not someone I want to ask advice from. So some questions:
1. why do baths at night? I have been giving her baths during the day after i shower.
2. She only eats on one side usually. Is this okay? I can't really force her to eat both.
3. She is fussy each night around 9pm and last night she would only sleep on my chest and was up every 2 hours. Usually I can calm her and feed her by 11pm and then swaddle and then she will sleep in her bassinet. How do we start some sort of routine like I keep seeing everyone talking about?
4. When is a good time to move from bassinet to crib?
I just feel so lost sometimes...help.....
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Re: questions from FTM
1. You can do baths anytime you want. Most people do baths at night because it relaxes their LO and that helps to put them to bed.
2. I don't know the answer to this....I dont BF
3. I did not notice how old your LO was, but chances are they are too young to really create a spot on "routine" yet. However, you can start heading that way by every night around a certain time give LO bath (this is another reason why people bath at night, to signal to their LO it's "bedtime"), give bottle, rock and put to sleep, I am pretty sure that is how most people start to establish a routine, at this young age however, it won't always be the same time every night (probably within an hour difference everynight) right now we are still running on the LO's schedule.
4. This is completely up to you. I had mine in the rock n play sleeper next to my bed for 2 or 3 weeks, but he is a major grunter when he sleeps, so I moved him to his crib so DH and I can sleep more soundly, so like I said, this is a preference. There is no "right or wrong" time to transition, but obviously they will outgrow the bassinet eventually!
1. Sometimes a bath at night can soothe and relax them. I am also a FTM and I bathe my D at night and she sleeps longer after.
2. My LC said it was fine but to switch her on to the other side the next time she eats OR if she favors one side to pump the other breast while she is feeding on the other or right after. I know a client that just fed on one side and didnt do anything to the other boob and now that she is done breast feeding her boobs look very uneven.
3/4. My D sleeps in her pack n play during the day and her crib at night. This is what we have always done. She never protested this. I would just say to put her in her crib and if she protests it stay consistent and she will soon learn that is where she sleeps. Also when you are done feeding and she drifts off to sleep put her right in her crib.. dont let her get all comfy and sleep on you for 30 min to an hour.. just put her down. With breast feeding I feel like you will be feeding more.. so I cant help you with the every two hours thing.. that actually seems normal.
I'm sorry to hear about your mom. To make you feel better, this is my third and I still feel like I don't know what I am doing. Here are some answers, but remember each kid is different so do what works for your family.
1. Baths at night can be part of your bedtime routine, but you can do them whenever you want. I bathe when I have a chance, so it can be anytime of day.
2. Try different positions, you don't want to lose your supply on the other side. I would offer the 'non preferred side' first, but don't do it when she is screaming hungry.
3. A lot of babies have a fussy time. Max is fussy from 8-11 at night. He wants to be held all the time and cluster feeds. That's normal for babies. I don't see how old your LO is, but don't worry about getting on a schedule until you get a better sense of when she likes to eat and sleep. For the first two weeks, you are just in survival mode. I don't work on 'schedules' until my kids are older and sleeping more. The thing with schedules is a kid hits a growth spurt or reflux and the schedule is shot to hell.
4. My bassinet weight limit is 15 lbs, but I use our co-sleepr and plan to keep him in our room for a few months. My middle daughter is still in the crib and breastfeeding is easier when he is in my room.
There are very few 'right' answers when taking care of a newborn. Don't be too hard on yourself. You are doing a great job. Let me know if you have any other questions.
Max born July 25
Big sisters Alex and Layla
my LO is 3 weeks and 5 days. I was trying to make a ticker but couldn't get it to work, along with my Huge picture. Don't know how to make it smaller.
LO is also a huge grunter and makes tons of sounds when she sleeps. So when she is in her crib, how do I know she is actually awake? She rarely cries except for her fussy time.
I have a monitor and I have learned to sleep through his grunts (athough he doesn't grunt NEARLY as much in his crib), I get up once his little noises have turned into full on cries.
Thank you. Now its all set.
how long do fussy times last for? do they outgrow this pretty quickly?
how much is your LO awake during the day? mine sleeps and eats all day and then wakes up around 5pm for an hour or so and then doesn't really wake up again until right before her fussy time.
1. Baths are relaxing for a baby (and for adults too!), so a lot of people find it a good idea to give them before bedtime. I give DD2 her bath whenever I get a chance, nad that usually is during the day. Don't worry about it.
2. As long as your DD is satisfied, one side is fine. Mine will sometimes nurse from both sides, some other times from one side only. Again, nothing to worry about here
3. Welcome to witching hour. TOTALLY normal (and sucky). I'm a second time mom and I can't wrap my head around starting a bed time routine for another few weeks at least. See6 You're definitely not alone in that department!
4. We moved DD1 to her crib when she outgrew her bassinet. She was about 3mo (she is pretty big, though). Planning to do the same with DD2
1. Bathtime can be whenever you'd like. Right now my evening bathtime is reserved my toddler. If my husband is home to do his bath I'll do baby's bath some days, but certainly not everyday. I found it got more important to incorporate bathtime into our bedtime routine after we started solids (so like 5-6 mos) and he was super messy after dinner.
2. I was told to always offer the 2nd side and if she doesn't take no problem. Just remember to start on that side next time so you're staying fairly even.
3. Evenings are notoriously fussy times. The nights my husband is home I often just sit on the couch and nurse - which is a welcome respite from my day with the toddler!
Just try to make it through and if you have a swing it can be awesome for this time!
4. My son stayed in his bassinet for 4 months and then successfully transferred to his crib. It's entirely up to you.
The thing about babies is there is no one answer. You're doing a great job!
1. A nurse told us children associate bathtime with bedtime. She suggested we start incorporating bathtime as part of the bedtime routine every night, so he will start to understand it's almost time for sleeping.
2. I had this problem. I've read that most women have a higher milk output on one side (usually the left)- my baby preferred that side. My letdown was a lot slower on the right side as well. What I used to do was have him start feeding on the left until the right side let down, and then move him to the right, trying not to change his body position at all. Now I don't have a problem getting him to latch to either side.
3. Both my pediatrician and several nurses have told me the secret to getting a baby to sleep through the night is to feed them every 3 hours on a set schedule. We start at 9 AM and feed every 3 hours throughout the day with 30 minute feeding sessions. If he acts hungry between feedings, he gets a paci (if he acts REALLY unhappy, I obviously don't starve him...you have to use your judgement). My baby is a month old and only wakes up once at 3 AM during the night since we started his routine.
4. Our baby slept in his crib after the first week. A nurse told us to go ahead and move him over, because he will sleep better (apparently babies can smell their mothers and want to nurse).
I hope this helps! The first few weeks are really really tough, but it gets a lot better. And don't be afraid to call your baby's doctor if you have questions like this...we have really made ours earn their money, and it has made our lives SO much easier.