I've made a decision! (long)

shari2010

Hey  everyone! I thought hard about whever I should go straight into the DE program or try IUI one more time. I've decided to try one more time with IUI. My RE said it probably wouldn't work since my eggs aren't good quality(thats why he won't do IVF with me!) but he said  I could try. I asked to try a new drug this time. I had been using Follistem for the last 3 cycles. So this time he gave me follistem and menopur! So I'm a little nervous since I have never used Menopur before. I was supposed to go for my fisrt check today but since Hurrucane Irene struck last night (I'm in NJ) so I was unable to go this morning! So now I have to wait till tomorrow morning to be checked and will start my drugs tomorrow night instead of today like I was hoping. I'm  really hoping this will work! But I'm I'm also realistic that it might not. I'm 40 and only started ttc a year ago. My SIL did IUI with donor sperm 6 times. 2 didn't work and on the 4th full cyle she had her DD who I love like my own!So now she is trying IUI again and is in her 2ww. I'm so excited for her but the thought of her being pregnant and me not is so hard! I have 2 sisters who have 7 kids between them and 2 SIL who have 3. I just want one! I'll be married a year in October so I got started late and I feel I'm being punished for finding mr. right later in life!  So here I go! One more cycle of IUI and then if not lucky I'll go into the donor program. I'm ok with using a donor egg but still have the dream of using my own. So thats my story for now! Thanks for listening! This really helps talking with women who understand what I'm going through.   

lindaeverly

I can only imagine how hard of a decision this was for you to make.  I will be thinking about you tomorrow & hoping that you can get in safely for the first steps in this IUI. 

I can totally understand how hard it is to be around so many children & wanting one of your own so badly.  I would never want to take away anyone else's happiness in having their own family, but it is hard to be around the sometimes.  I try to keep a smile on my face when I'm around all of my friends & their kids, but I do cry when I get home sometimes too. 

Try to keep your faith alive & know that you will have your happiness one day too!!!  ((hugs))

Bubs711

I know what you mean by meeting your DH later in life.  I've loved being the cool aunt, and he's loved being the cool uncle (I have 5 nieces/nephews and he has 8), but we're longing for a LO of our own now.

I hope the new meds work, and this IUI is successful.  Good luck to you!

HappyMrsK

Good luck to you!

ELF4321

Shari -- if you haven't already, you might get a second opinion on IVF and whether you need donor eggs or not.  My RE and most of the research I've done said that egg quality really can only be inferred as an issue -- none of the ovarian reserve tests really reflects quality, just quantity. 

My RE said the best way to figure out if there is an egg quality issue is to go ahead and try IVF, because then they can see how many fertilize and whether they grow.  I think a lot of RE's will not do IVF with DOR patients because they are afraid of bringing their SART averages down.  I would def. get a second opinion before deciding if you should move on to donor eggs. 

Colorado Center for Reproductive Medicine does phone consults with out of state patients -- you send them all of your records/test results and then have a phone consult with the doctor to see what they think.  They have phenomenal IVF success rates with a high volume of DOR patients.  I did a second opinion with them and the doctor had some interesting thoughts and ideas that my more conservative RE here didn't bring up.

Are you in North Jersey?  If so, PM me if you want to talk about the different fertility centers in the area.  I've done quite a bit of research on them and those in NYC. 

Good luck with your IUI.  Who knows, maybe the menopur will make the difference for you. 

happywifemomofone

Best of luck with your IUI.  I'm in agreement with ELF that I would consult with a second RE about IVF.  Women with DOR  DO have some good eggs, just not as many as other women.  IVF response is unlikely to be similar to that of a younger woman.  Saw a link on internet that showed  many dots.  In a regular woman, 100-150 of those dots are a different color (indicating a good quality egg)  In a woman with DOR there might be 75 dots with only 25 of them being a different color.  I know that I'll NEVER respond to stimulation medications like a younger woman, but I always try to remember that it only takes ONE.  Might mean that in an IVF cycle you might get 3-5 eggs, but only one is mature and fertilizes.    Hope that Menopur helps you to produce egg quality that you need.  You can also ask RE about DHEA supplements, studies say that it improves egg quality.  Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

shari2010

 Yes I have been taking DHEA fo the past 5 months. I live in central jersey and really need a second opinion before moving on to DE. I will try anything! Thanks for your support! 

shyntrue

(Hugs)  Our stories sound familiar.  Met DH the month after my 39th b-day.  BIL & SIL have 7 kids.  I hope your road isn't as long as mine has been.

Good Luck!

daosdf

This post edited by moderator to remove hyperlink spam.

krod2010

Good luck to you! I just finished IVF #5 in a year and I finally decided to moving on with DE with my identical twin sister. I am 40. She had no problems conceiving in her mid 30's 2 children. Mine is too long of a story to get into but I understand your feelings and just wanted to tell you good luck and I hope it works for you! We all know how hard infertility is and how hard it is to conceive over 35. I know how hard it can be on a marriage and doing this your first year-I am in the same boat.