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BM reaffirming her being SD mom

BM friended all of us on FB.  My DH has custody.  We don't really care, we accepted, we have nothing to hide and it might open up a whole new world to her as far as the stupidity.  She made a comment on one of the photos I uploaded of SD (14).  "that's my BEAUTIFUL baby girl!!!".  A few of my friends commented on it before and then she did.  I just responded to the other comments that they pic turned out cute etc. etc. didn't even acknowledge BM's comment.  This was the photo that they took at SD's new school for her ID and school pictures and SD wanted me to take a picture of it and upload it on facebook...so I did.  This has never happened before because in most situations that are encountered BM doesn't say anything.  At SD 8th grade graduation, one of her friends mom's turned around and said to DH and I "are you SD's parents" we were like yeah and introduced ourselves (he as dad and me as SM) and we chatted for a bit and BM and her BF walked away.  WTF!  Show some interest in your DD.  She doesn't participate in the school stuff.  I am just annoyed and venting because all my friends know she is my SD but no one cares.  You is just using some internet balls because she would never do that to my face.  Ugggghhh  No point to this post, just annoyed.  

Re: BM reaffirming her being SD mom

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    Insecure people do this alot on facebook.  I had a similar experience with an ex-fiance's wife when I friended mutual friends of ours.  It was wierd and annoyed me to know end, but I got over it because I saw it as HER issue. Not mine.

    You can do one of two things: 

    1. Recognize it as her insecurity and just ignore it and let it go. Keep her as a friend to show that you are making an effort. And genuinely do so.  And just know that this is her M.O. and to not let it get you worked up when she makes insecure comments like this.  It's just how she is.

    2. If you can't genuinely make an effort to get along, and she really drives you this crazy and you're pretty sure you're not going to be able to let it go - I suggest you hide all her comments so you don't have to view them, or remove her as a friend all together and block her.  Privatize your profile so only friends can see it.

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    image+j+k+:

    Insecure people do this alot on facebook.  I had a similar experience with an ex-fiance's wife when I friended mutual friends of ours.  It was wierd and annoyed me to know end, but I got over it because I saw it as HER issue. Not mine.

    You can do one of two things: 

    1. Recognize it as her insecurity and just ignore it and let it go. Keep her as a friend to show that you are making an effort. And genuinely do so.  And just know that this is her M.O. and to not let it get you worked up when she makes insecure comments like this.  It's just how she is.

    2. If you can't genuinely make an effort to get along, and she really drives you this crazy and you're pretty sure you're not going to be able to let it go - I suggest you hide all her comments so you don't have to view them, or remove her as a friend all together and block her.  Privatize your profile so only friends can see it.

    I agree with all of this!

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    That's what DH and I think...she's insecure.  I don't have any problems with her and we get along for the most part.  We have had moments were we don't but this is the first time she has ever done something like this in anyway, shape or form.  She's usually pretty passive about it and has said to me numerous times that she appreciates me being in her DD's life.  I have been with my H since SD was 1 1/2.  I just responded to comments that a few of my friends made and ignored it.  Hopefully it won't get to out of hand or she will be blocked.  
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    I'm sorry, I don't follow where the comment: "that's my beautiful baby girl" is inappropriate. I understand that you are the main mother-figure in her day-to-day life, but what's wrong with her mom acknowledging the picture and the fact that her daughter looks beautiful in it? What am I missing here?
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    hopanka - I actually kind of find it a pukey when mothers do this on facebook.  Posting a picture and simply stating "My Beautiful Daughter" as a title of a picture is one thing...but to put it in a comment with such a huge emphasis like she did is a bit much.

    It would be no different than her walking up to her daughter amongst a group of people and fussing loudly over her beauty in public.  Wouldn't you give someone the side eye if they did that?

    People don't seem to see how narcisstic(and insecure) they can be on facebook.

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    image+j+k+:

    hopanka - I actually kind of find it a pukey when mothers do this on facebook.  Posting a picture and simply stating "My Beautiful Daughter" as a title of a picture is one thing...but to put it in a comment with such a huge emphasis like she did is a bit much.

    It would be no different than her walking up to her daughter amongst a group of people and fussing loudly over her beauty in public.  Wouldn't you give someone the side eye if they did that?

    People don't seem to see how narcisstic(and insecure) they can be on facebook.

    I still don't see anything wrong with what she did  :::shrugs::: 

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    I probably have more sympathy for this because I go thru this with my ex's wife. And I might be assuming it's a similar situation but I totally get this and know there could very well be more going on than what the OP is conveying in this post.

    In my case it is like my ex's wife is competing and trying to one up me. It annoyed me to no end. I too made a comment to someone totally unconnected who did not have visibility to this and she thought I was over reacting. So I assumed I was being overly sensitive. Until...two of our mutual friends PM'd on seperate occassions said something to me about how annoying it was getting to them. That's when I knew I wasn't imagining it.

    I had her blocked for some time, and commented freely until a friend told me that whenever I post it seems like every time she will jump on and do run-on comments after me - as if to prove she's better friends with them than I am. It was getting ridiculous. So I unblocked her so I could watch what I say more carefully or just not comment. I now either post directly on a friend's wall, or watch and limit my comments on our mutual friend's status.  Ever since I've done that, she has considerably stopped, but she still has her moments - and almost always in conjunction with someting I have posted.

    So I totally can see it. Again, I might be assuming too much too, but I've been there. I can see she may have a similar situation on her hands.

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    image+j+k+:

    hopanka - I actually kind of find it a pukey when mothers do this on facebook.  Posting a picture and simply stating "My Beautiful Daughter" as a title of a picture is one thing...but to put it in a comment with such a huge emphasis like she did is a bit much.

    It would be no different than her walking up to her daughter amongst a group of people and fussing loudly over her beauty in public.  Wouldn't you give someone the side eye if they did that?

    People don't seem to see how narcisstic(and insecure) they can be on facebook.

     

    This is exactly what I was trying to get at and you got it spot on.  She is very insecure.  All my friends know that SD is my SD but now that BM is on facebook she wants the world to know that she her REAL mom.  It's just frustrating because it's embarrasing to SD and BM has no common sense or boundries.   

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