Gay

MGM81

Family middle name is Gay (my grandmothers middle name Era Gay) my Mothers middle name & mine.

We decided not to know the sex of our 1st and our top names were Ava, Alex or Max. We had a little girl & went with Ava and I decided to drop the "Gay" for a middle name. I couldn't pull the trigger with the middle name...

With our second thank god it was a boy and I could avoid "Gay" for a middle name and we went with Max.

So as I get older I am torn if we have a 3rd to use "Gay" for a girls middle name. I am not in love with the middle name but would be upset if another family member use it.

I can't use it or lose it so what do YOU think of the middle name Gay?!?!  

RedCardinal

Could you use Gayla as a mn, to keep the tradition ? It seems a bit more feminine.

Fancy3Face

I don't care for it, but if its a family name and you WANT to use it I'm all for it.  You could use May or something similar. 

LaComtesse

The men on my mother's side of the family, including my grandfather, are named Adolph. This is a tradition going back as far back as anyone can remember in Italy. Adolph.

My grandparents broke that tradition and named their first-born son "Michael". They were right to do so. Sometimes, names just stop being okay. I think it's safe to say "Gay" is up there. Not as bad as Adolph, but it's a rather unfortunate name these days.

Maybe alter "Gay" to "Gayle"?

NellaJ

My friend growing up had the middle name Gay. She got teased in school ALOT!

l&s&baby

@LaComtesse WOW. Just wow. Good thing your grandparents had some sense!!

 OP I agree that Gay has gone out of style... I get the family significance but just don't think it works as a mn anymore. I like the suggestion of Gayle, or if you didn't want to change the pronunciation maybe you could spell it Gaye or Gae.

Moneypenny424

LaComtesse:

The men on my mother's side of the family, including my grandfather, are named Adolph. This is a tradition going back as far back as anyone can remember in Italy. Adolph.

My grandparents broke that tradition and named their first-born son "Michael". They were right to do so. Sometimes, names just stop being okay. I think it's safe to say "Gay" is up there. Not as bad as Adolph, but it's a rather unfortunate name these days.

Maybe alter "Gay" to "Gayle"?

I agree with all of this.  I wouldn't do that to my child.  Kids are cruel and that makes your child such an easy target.  I agree that Gayle would be a nice choice.

magsugar13

 I am not in love with the middle name but would be upset if another family member use it.

So, what you are saying is that you dont like it and wouldnt use it, but dont want anyone else to have it either?

first of all oyu dont own it so anyone can use it, but i think that statement is very immature.

LaComtesse

l&s&baby:

@LaComtesse WOW. Just wow. Good thing your grandparents had some sense!!

 OP I agree that Gay has gone out of style... I get the family significance but just don't think it works as a mn anymore. I like the suggestion of Gayle, or if you didn't want to change the pronunciation maybe you could spell it Gaye or Gae.

Heh. Yeah, they're good people. I only recently learned that, apparently, my grandfather went by "Al" at school and that's how my grandmother was introduced to him and she had no idea what his real name was. When she went to meet his family, she referred to him as "Al" and my grandfather's mother glared at my grandfather and said "His. Name. Is. Adolph."

lageorgiapaperie

As PP said, I think Gayle would be a nice alternative to Gay while still honoring your family.

MGM81

Thanks 4 all the input! I think Gayla would be an respectable choice!

@ LaComtesse  Adolph would be difficult to continue! Thanks 4 relating

@ magsugar yea, your right I don't own it! I wouldn't care if others family members used it since my Grandma, Mom, me & my cousin have the middle name and I didn't invent it or own it. Any name is up for grabs!  I was more generalizing if other family use it I would be mad or more like a regret that I didn't go with the family tradition or continue with it. 

anna7602

MGM81:

I am not in love with the middle name but would be upset if another family member use it.

 

I kind of get this. I couldn't change my maiden name fast enough when I married due to how hard it was to spell and pronounce, but it still makes me a little sad that all my brothers' kids have this last name and DD doesn't. Ultimately, though, my tie to it is purely sentimental and objectively, I didn't see the point of giving my daughter a a ridiculously complicated hyphenated last name (especially when I didn't even keep my maiden name).

Take that argument as you will. I guess what I'm saying is that deep down you either really want to use it or you don't. You can still feel a little proprietary about it, but that doesn't necessarily mean you should use it.

ChavayJakov

It doesn't matter, honestly, what we think of the name Gay.  *You* don't like or want it for your children.  Really the only thing you have to do is get over yourself if another family decides to use the name.

ames71

My dad's cousin (who is pushing 60) was always known by the nn Gay. In the last ten years or so she's gone by her given name (Grace) more often. I think older family members are the only one who still call her Gay.

You said "thank god it was a boy and I could avoid Gay for a middle name" when your son was born. I think that says it all -- you don't have to carry on a tradition that you don't love simply for the sake of the tradition itself.

DaisyViolet

I had twin students named Prince and Princess Gay.  They did not enjoy Middle School as much as you  might...

SassyRedhead

Um it's time to update that tradition to save future generations agony.

kellyrn9956

I can't help it - I think of Gaylord Focker.

Sorry

But I actually think it's a very pretty name.

sugarpumpkin716

it might be a family name but it's just a terrible, terrible idea. if gayla isn't much better.

cowgirltu

If you want to continue the tradition, def use a variation of Gay.  My father, brother and uncle are all named Larry, but I dont love the name.  So we are using Lawrence for a mn.  It still honors the family name, but in a way that DH and I like.

SEWF

I know someone named Gaylin and someone named Gayle. Maybe those could work and be a bit more accepted.

kennifer26

If you would be upset if someone else used it then you better grab it if you can.

g00dg0llymsm0lly

I think although it's a legitimate family name, it is likely to cause problems, unfortunately. My ex's last name is Gay, and he got into a fight and kicked out of school because of it, so when he switched schools he started using his mother's maiden name, and still goes by that to this day.

Gayle is a win-win.

TruN

Wow the names you bumperss come up with is like sad. not good at all.

Mrs.Deputy

Could you do something else that means happy? Like Joy or Blythe?

MGM81

@Mrs.Deputy

LOVE LOVE LOVE Blythe! Ummm why didn't I think of that?!? Beautiful! Thank you! 

Instead of "Babies on the brain" I really just have baby names on the brain and day dreaming & thinking of more babies/names! Enjoy your weekend! 

BLPL101

Go with Gayle. 

704bride

Sorry, I don't like it.  Poor thing would be teased.

Mrs.Deputy

MGM81:

@Mrs.Deputy

LOVE LOVE LOVE Blythe! Ummm why didn't I think of that?!? Beautiful! Thank you! 

Instead of "Babies on the brain" I really just have baby names on the brain and day dreaming & thinking of more babies/names! Enjoy your weekend! 

It's one of my very favorites, too! Glad I could help 

kcvasquez

What about Gayle?

sobelleus

I know someone with the first name Gaye who is in her late 40's. And she is.