Not naming your baby before it is born...

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

plunderb

It's not unusual to wait til you see the baby to see if the name "fits" (Wrinkles? CriesALot?), but it should not really be surprising that you aren't waiting. Some families and cultures are a bit wary of naming or sharing names before the birth, so perhaps that's where she was coming from.

There was a woman in my breastfeeding group who still had not named her 10-week-old daughter ? they kept going back and forth between two names and planned on just alternating them until they settled on which they liked better.

SassyRedhead

With DD we had two names picked out.  After she was born I held her up and went around the room to my family and asked if she was a "Kate" or a "Reese" and the vote was unanimously  "Reese"  

I do think it's a good idea to come in with an alternate just in case they look nothing like the name you had in mind.

FWIW, she is definitely a Reese

jennasita

No. I could not do this. I have to have at least an idea (and probably the final name) before the baby is born. I want my children to have an identity as soon as they arrive.

Brilanea

Not related to the subject but Mrs.Mooney go to TTGP, if you haven't seen it yet you got a post just for you

& yes I was totally lurking & being nosey  

chankins14

DH & I have very different name tastes.  We talked names all the time but didn't decide on one until DS was 3 days old.  No biggie.  It looks like that's gonna be the story with this LO as well.

sweetadventure

We had a list of several names that we liked at the ready but we didn't choose one until we met our son.  Maybe it is silly to some but the name we chose felt right after we saw and held him.  We will do this next time too.  Also, it is nice even if you are pretty sure of your choice because it is not a big deal to change your mind since no one knows what your choice was.  It was important to me that we went in there prepared with several names that we liked and had considered for months to choose from.

paulaanne

SassyRedhead:

With DD we had two names picked out.  After she was born I held her up and went around the room to my family and asked if she was a "Kate" or a "Reese" and the vote was unanimously  "Reese"  

I do think it's a good idea to come in with an alternate just in case they look nothing like the name you had in mind.

FWIW, she is definitely a Reese

She is also ADORABLE!!!! Makes me smile!

OP - I don't see a problem waiting to decide to see what works, but I also think it's very normal for people to choose a name they love regardless.

Amanda&EricB

We are taking a list of names to the hospital, and will name him after he's born. I can see why people do it other ways, but for us this is right.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Brilanea

MrsMooney:

Brilanea:

Not related to the subject but Mrs.Mooney go to TTGP, if you haven't seen it yet you got a post just for you

& yes I was totally lurking & being nosey  

Thanks for telling me! I've been lurking there a bit (it was my home for almost a year... LOL) but would have missed it!

My pleasure. Was my home too for what seemed like forever (not sure if you remember me, I started posting less & less as time went by). I go lurk over there every now & then purely for entertainment - classic example: the fake bfp post

queenbone

My first son we were team green; he didn't have a name for 3 days.  My second son we knew was a boy, and were pretty sure on the name before birth, but he didn't have a middle name for 2 days

mightymartha

We named DD before her birth, but for this one we're going to see what Orthodox saints are venerated around the due date and name the baby when s/he is here. S/he is due on April 1, which is St. Mary of Egypt's nameday, so we're pretty sure we'll name a girl Mary-Something. It's also close to Pascha/Easter, so we'll consider that.

kygirlie113

We were Team Green and had two boy names and two girl names when we went in for delivery.  I just felt like I needed to meet my child before naming them.  And, if we have a second, we would probably do the same thing.  Not too many things in life are surprises (well, good ones anyways), and my DH and I enjoyed meeting our son, naming him, and then announcing it at the hospital.

But everyone's different.

ces25c

michellekay06:

I want a name before the baby is born, but I'm keeping options open. If my baby is clearly not a Riley like I'm planning we have other names that we like. I don't see a problem with being prepared.

We also have a name picked but have said all along we would change it if it didn't fit her.  I am actually starting to have second thoughts about our name but I think it's just cold feet.

If we hadn't come up with a name, I would have been ok as long as we had it narrowed down to a few choices.  I also would be fine with going a few days or maybe even longer without a name.  The only thing that would bother me would probably be all the people asking if we'd picked a name yet.

AlphabetFish

I think if I were having a baby (someday...) I would choose a name, and just make sure that I still loved the name after the baby had arrived. I don't think it would take me 3 days to choose. What did they do, read the entire baby name book at their daughter and see which one she "liked"?

There is nothing wrong with knowing what name you love and sticking with it. It's not like you'll look at your newborn, think, "Oh my God, this name doesn't suit him/her AT ALL and now I hate it!" and still name the baby that because, you know, you already decided and you can never change your mind, ever.

BUT, chances are, you will look at your baby and the name you like will fit fine, and everything will be okay. Plenty of people look at their newborn kids, and a name doesn't magically float down from the heavens, and they survive! 

barnwife

DH and I didn't discuss names when I was pregnant with J. Actually, technically we did have one name discussion which was solely about names that we hate and could never imagine using.

Oddly enough we started using one of those names to refer to LO while I was pg because we were Team Green and it made us laugh.

Anyway, we didn't discuss names we'd actually use until J. was born. And he was named in 36ish hours. But, yeah, I'd have waited longer if that's what it took to find the perfect name.

KatieLG04

DS didn't have a name for 2 days because we could not agree on a boys name we both liked.  DS was team green, and we had 2 or 3 girls names we both liked and would have decided shortly after birth.  For boys names we just were too stubborn until the hosptial staff came in and said it would be easier if we decided before the person left work for the weekend.  We needed that push apparently.  His name fits him well.

tusshie2004

I would like to have a name picked out before baby is born. There are a lot of cultures, specifically African cultures that wait to name the baby. When we named DS, I knew that he was an Amari. When I saw him, the name fit him. 

COMomma81

It wasn't by choice but our daughter didn't have a name for 3 days. We had had a list of compromise names we were considering that we took with us, but I'd had my reservations about them even before she was born and definitely did after she was born. Nothing fit and I hated feeling like I was going to have name her something that I didn't really even like or it didn't fit her.

Just as I predicted, it took the nurse coming in to the room to collect her birth certificate paperwork that sat blank on the table to force us to decide. I had a mini-breakdown about her not having a name and my husband let me chose a name I loved and it really does suit her. I'm so glad we gave it time instead of just settling on something just so she'd have a name for the sake of having one right away.

Fancy3Face

My niece didn't have a name for 3 days.  I think it perfectly fine to take your time.  Name regret can't be a good feeling

samakasrc

We are team green and we will be taking a small list of 3 or 4 of our favorite names to the hospital with us. With my DD We had her name picked out as soon as we knew she was coming. With this LO, being team green, we decided to not choose officially till after.  We had some trouble with family when we announced Evelyn's name, they were like "that's old, where'd you hear that???" and not in a positive way, so we aren't even saying what are current choices are this time around. The few that I've told my BFF and sister and stuff they've stuck their nose up at, so we'll pick and then it'll be too late for them to judge...

pensparade

NO. WAY.

I know people do that and if that's they're style, that's fine by me but personally, no. There is no way I could do that.

With DD I had to pick a name ASAP.

Having a name made me feel so much more connected to her as well. It made me feel like she was a real person, not just something living inside of me. It helped us to really visualize who she was going to be. I don't regret it one bit. I just can't wrap my head around this business of waiting to see the baby to pick a name.