still here

jcthomas1281

its been a year since my husband kicked me and the babies out. I am ready for this divorce to be over but the arguments continue. I thought we were in a friendly place with each other until today, when he called me a crazy psycho b**** and that no one in the world would ever want me because I make everyone around me miserable.

He has only seen his boys 4 times in the past year, but I know there will come a time when he wants them to visit him, and according to the courts I have to let them visit.

How did you all handle the first alone/overnight visit? I think I might go nuts, and camp outside his apartment.

PrettyInPearls23

He's only seen them 4x in a year and you have to let them go for an overnight visit?

But, to answer your question, stay busy during your first overnight visit. A busy mind doesn't have time to worry.

cmanmom

jcthomas1281:

He has only seen his boys 4 times in the past year, but I know there will come a time when he wants them to visit him, and according to the courts I have to let them visit.

How did you all handle the first alone/overnight visit? I think I might go nuts, and camp outside his apartment.

Yup, unless you change to PP, he can come and go as he pleases...not showing up for visits until there's nothing else going on, or in my case to keep his Mommy happy and giving him money.

My exH just exercised his first visitation in 18 months, thank goodness the original plan didn't involve overnights, but I even felt that 6 hours was too much out the gate for DS to spend with a virtual stranger.  Too bad for us.  Thankfully DS did fine, he's a pretty easygoing kiddo but still.  I asked to be with them until DS was comfortable but exH was having none of that.  I ended up driving DS 1 hour each direction myself to exH family's house so that at least took 2 hours off his time.  Of course he agreed to that since he doesn't have a license and would have some explaining to do to his family about why he needed one of them to drive him!

My advice - keep busy.  Plan something.  Go shopping, rent some movies, have dinner and drinks with a friend.  If it's overnight, sleep in!  Do something that is a pain/hassle with the kids involved.