Another hybernation ?

JakesBride07

How do you explain to not very understanding freinds/family the importance or reasoning behind tucking away during RSV season? And how do you deal with their ignorance and lack of support?

I already see a problem with the IL's because they think because we aren't on strict lockdown right now, we don't need to be during RSV season...and they already are making a stink about the holidays because DH and I have made mention that Thanksgiving and Christmas will be at our place, and limited only to Grandparents and DH's S and her husband. No school age kids, smokers, and more specifically none of the above if they are even remotely sick, because it's just to risky.

MIL has already mentioned her displeasure with this situation because it excludes her sister (DH's aunt) and her school aged son, (note that Aunt is also a heavy smoker) and she feels very strongly that we should still take the twins to Aunt's house for both holidays, like we always to, because it's "tradition".

And based on our most recent encounter I am willing to bet MIL is going to invite Aunt to our place against our wishes.

 

mfisher123

Your in-laws seem like a piece of work!

As for making everyone happy, it's not going to happen. Our Xmas last year was held at our house, with only a few immediate family members making the cut. We totally broke tradition by doing this, but there just came a point where DH and I stopped caring what others thought. Tough $hit!

Good luck! I've been keeping up with you guys because my daughter had a cleft palate and a g-tube as well. 

kaylaaimee

"dr's orders" is my mantra.

katie4253

How about, "This is the way it is, you don't have to come if you can't deal with it".

Seriously, I am so over ass hat in-laws.  

 

hnyloven

I definitely used "Dr's order" more than once during our RSV season. I also found that explaining exactly what RSV was and why it was so dangerous to DS helped those hard headed relatives and friends. Most people don't understand how a "cold" could be dangerous. Maybe try having your DH have one last heart to heart with his mom explaining the dangers and if she's still being stubborn tell her to keep her a$$ home too >:0

OscarQ

My plan is to come up with a plan, socialize it with the family and then stick to the plan!

I just sent DH the link to the RSV season post this morning and we just started talking about Christmas.  So he and I are beginning to come up with a plan for RSV season and the holidays now.

Someone on here has a blog post where they explained to family and friends how their baby coming into contact with germs presents more challenges than it would to a "normal' baby.  I'll probably write a similiar post on our blog and discuss it with our families.

As for Christmas, I really just don't want to travel.  Let alone deal with RSV season plus travel. Last Christmas was a nightmare and this year I just want to enjoy a peaceful, quiet time at home with my little family.

kck329

kaylaaimee:

"dr's orders" is my mantra.

This is our line as well. I also tell them that according to our neos, preemies have a 60% chance of rehospitalization in the first year. You can bet we are doing all we can to keep her healthy regardless of other peoples feelings.

JakesBride07

hnyloven:

Maybe try having your DH have one last heart to heart with his mom explaining the dangers and if she's still being stubborn tell her to keep her a$$ home too >:0

I will suggest this again, however the last two attempts...yeah they didn't go so well and judging by the fact that they will invite "strangers" (their neighbors) to come "look at the cute babies" with out asking us first. Seriously one night we were all out at the car, and the babies were in that car in their seats and a neighbor came by and FIL opened the door and goes "You have to see them!"

I was livid. They don't get it at all.

lemen99

I posted an informative post on my blog about RSV and preemie lungs.  We also said a lot of "the doctors said..."...and honestly, we just didn't care - we weren't shy about speaking up.

AVA0908

I got tired of explaining things pretty quick. I had no patience for people being ignorant, so if they didn't like our decisions, then they did not have to see my son. Your babies are first priority and decisions you and DH make might upset others. Put your foot down-you just have to keep thinking that you are doing the best for them. Good luck!