Things you love about your MIL?

ClaireBear90

It seems like a lot of us have been having negative experiences with MILs lately, everything from having them criticize our decisions to finding out that they told the world about our pregnancies even though we told them not to. 

Hopefully there are some things we can appreciate about them, #1 being that they raised our husbands. Anybody else appreciate their MIL? 

My MIL was a huge help getting ready for our wedding day. I could ask her to do anything and she'd do it. She has also helped with painting and yard work on countless occasions at our house. Lately my in-laws have been inviting us to come over for dinner almost every week. (This is a huge blessing since I can't stand to cook!) And when she isn't running around (she's the most energetic person I know) she and I have nice chats about gardening or vacations or DH when he was little.  

ETA: I don't mean to rub salt in the wound for anyone who has been hurt by their MIL. (I have been too, more than once, but I am convinced that she never intends to hurt me... and I tend to be a sensitive person.)  

mkarns

I'm visiting the in-laws right now. My MIL just warmed up a heating pad and put it under my SUPER sore back, without me askng for a thing. I thought that was sweet.

elizxu

My MIL is Colombian and has decided to stay in the states instead of going back to see the rest of her family until the babies are born (her other DIL is expecting 2 months before me). I know she is thrilled to be having two grandchildren, but I also know she's sad not to see her mother & sisters for almost a year. She's also a great tour guide in Cartagena, where my DH grew up, when we vacation there. She tells me all the history & stories of city. She's an AMAZING cook & remembers to speak English around me, even when I'm the only non-Spanish speaking person around...my Spanish is slowly improving. My MIL keeps her distance (doesn't intrude) but is happy to do anything my DH or I need or ask. She's really a wonderful lady & I'm lucky to have her as my MIL. :-)

wigirl2007

My MIL is wonderful.  She is really quiet, so at times its hard to hold a conversation with her, but she never oversteps her bounds or gets in our business.  She was wonderfully helpful with our wedding and let us do it the way we wanted, even-though it was a bit unconventional. 

She also works for an eye doctor and gives me free samples of stuff all the time.  This is awesome because glasses/contacts are the one thing my insurance doesn't cover.  Last week she brought over an entire case of contact solution.  Awesome!

NicoleD715

During my last year of undergrad my husband went away to grad school across the country. My inlaws lived close and they let me live at their house for a year. I got very close to my in-laws. Soon after my DH and I got married my parents got a divorce, it was hard going back to the west coast and seeing them since I didn't really feel like I had a place were I belonged, but my MIL kept the bedroom the way it was when I left and it gave me comfort that first trip back to visit everyone.

Also, a couple of weeks ago we meet my in laws in the middle of were we live and went camping and my MIL got me away from everyone and asked me if I thought I needed help after the baby was born and I said yes since I don't think my parents are coming out until later and she said she will do all she can to be out here right before or a little after the baby is born to help me. But to make sure to tell her if she is getting in the way.

I have also been hurt by my MIL, but I just have to remember my DH is her kid and some of the stuff said she was just being a mother to her son. 

mommybrynn

This is a tough one.  I appreciate that she travels a lot.  Does that count?

Lilcountrysmiles

I, too, have been burned numerous times by my MIL.  However, she is a great woman.  She has been dealing with alot lately (health related) and still manages to keep a clean house, she only has one working hand at the moment (surgery).  Anyway, she is constantly asking how i'm doing and inviting us over for dinner, my husband owns his own company and works from their house since his shop is on their property. So he is often tired of being around them, so we don't go over often, but it is nice to just get the invite. We do spend time after dinner together playing scrabble or doing puzzles, things she enjoys while the DH's work on proposals and things.

Jeter1028

My MIL has been one of those who has made some pretty hurtful and nasty comments during this pregnancy.  But, prior to that, I always thought she was great.  I know it's probably hard for her to realize that her baby boy is no longer a baby.. That he is a man now with a family.  I think that may be part of why she reacted the way she did about my morning sickness and whatnot.  But, what I do love about her is that after DH proposed, she called me and told me how happy she was for us and that she was happy that DH found such a great woman and then thanked me for loving him.  So, she can be nice when she wants to. 

Now, my SIL on the other hand - I think she is AWESOME.  We spend alot of weekends at her place and she's been so amazing to me.  I never had a sister (5 brothers) so it's been such a great experience to have her in my life.

goldenleaves

MIL is very caring and genuinely loves to serve people and make them happy.

paulaanne

My future MIL is amazing! She's like the mom I always wanted! She spoils my fiance and now me! Lol. If I say I like a certain food, you better believe it will be there the next week at dinner. She is one of the kindest women I've ever met! I know I am lucky I certainly feel for those who have to deal with their MILs that are not as pleasant.

anardi

I LOVE my MIL! She is awesome! She worked two jobs, put herself through college and raised her kids.

The sad thing is she lives in FL. I wish she lived by us. She is so hopeful with SIL's two DD's it is crazy! I would love her to help up here but it is just not in the cards.

She is easy to talk too and always wants to help us. She is coming at the end of the month and I wish she was staying longer!

talentedmomma

I appreciate that she has learned boundaries, unfortunately to late for her to have a good relationship with her other DIL. If I ask her to look for something, fabric, a toy, she will and usually finds it on sale. She lives in a major city, whereas I live in the middle of no-where. She is very considerate of my wishes and respectful of my family and traditions. I also appreciate that she lives more than 2000kms away and cannot show up unannounced.

bwtsn

Oh MILs... I love mine, I really do, but sometimes... I just have to bite my tongue. She has never done anything to intentionally hurt me, she's just really opinionated and sometimes her thought process makes absolutely no sense to me, but that's just who she is. She's also very kind, generous, and extremely family oriented (sometimes too much )

Oh well, without MILs, we wouldn't have our DHs!

TLizzy

My MIL is a very calm "go with the flow" type of person. I appreciate her laid back approach to life because I am very type A.

She is also very involved in La Leche League, which will be helpful when I start breastfeeding!

Crazygal7987

My MIL and I have had some MAJOR differences.  Including telling me that my DH husband and I should see other people...2 months before our wedding.  We were young, so although I was angry, I could understand.  My parents raised me a completely different way than she raised my DH, and because of that we butt heads alot.  But since we have been married, and she sees that I am not going anywhere, she has worked really hard to repair our relationship, and now I cherish her as a member of our family.

I know it sounds shallow, but she gives us a TON of stuff.  For my birthday this past month she bought us a new stove.  Ours was broken, and she knew it was a necessity, especially with the baby coming.  Mama's gotta eat!  My DH and I are probably her only chance at having grandchildren, and with how hard it's been to get pregnant, I think she was worried.  She is head over heels in love with our baby already.  She has already told her husband (my DH step-dad) that the baby will be sleeping in their bed while he/she sleeps over.  He isn't exactly "baby friendly" but she said he can sleep somewhere else if he doesn't like it.  She makes sure I have all kinds of goodies while we are there, and she lets me nap.  Definitely a nice change from the old days.  I'm more than happy to be giving her her very first grandbaby

catlady08

That she lives 3 hours away

halo_tx

I have always appreciated that MIL has never acted like I'm taking her son away from her (like I've heard about so many other MIL's).  She also never tries to get him on "her side" for any issue. We also both work in education so I always enjoy being able to talk about that with her. DH's parents were both workaholics and very absent for his childhood, and now seem to want to make up for that and have a closer relationship. MIL is supportive of my choice to SAH and says if she had it to do again, that would have been her choice.

Also, and I know this might sound shallow, but IL's are very well-off and generous to us- they've made a lot of amazing things possible for us. They paid for our dream honeymoon, gave us a down payment for our house, will start a college fund for the baby, etc.

Gem17

She gave birth to DH, and she remarried after divorcing his dad (dad was never in the picture).  She married a wonderful man who adopted DH.  I am thankful FIL was in his life, so he didn't turn out like MIL.  My DH is wonderful!

ALHolli

A year and a half after long-distance dating my DH in college, I transferred to his school and his parents let me move in with them. My first winter in the snow belt, I totalled my truck, and they purchased a new car so I could have something to go to work and school in. I ended up living with them for 3 years, and by the last semester of school I had lost one of my jobs and didn't have money to complete, so they paid for my last semester of school.

FIL took DH to Pittsburgh to look for apartments after we were engaged and both graduated since he was getting a new job here, and they picked out an awesome one. We got a ton of hand-me-down housewares from his parents and sisters to get started. They also contributed a large portion of our new house's down payment.

MIL also did most of the work for our wedding. She reserved the hall, organized the food, helped me make gifts, etc. My dad's been laid off for a long time now and she understood my family (who's far away) is too financially strapped to help with much, which my parents hate.

MIL raised 5 kids, DH and his 4 older sisters, and has always treated me like her own, even when I moved so early on in our relationship. I don't even know where I'd be without his family.

Angiee930

She is great SOMETIMES, but most of the time she really ticks me off, like her stupid comment at dinner the other night that made me storm out of the restaurant in fury about the baby. ALSO the fact that she is all buddy buddy with my husbands ex that is a complete psycho path, they were together for a year and a half and DH and I almost together for 5 years.... There have been times where I just want to punch her   

KatelynEA90

I appreciate that she always has a handle of vodka, a few bottles of wine, and some whiskey on hand. Obviously for when I'm not pregnant, and could really use a drink. Which is like once every 5 months because I'm not a drinker.

Unfortunately, I don't appreciate how MIL raised SO and neither does he. His parents ruined a lot of things for him, when he was too young to understand the consequences. (Sorry, I know you were trying to make a happy thing but SO was just venting to me about that so it was fresh)

JessieJH

My MIL is like Fort Knox. I can trust that woman to take a secret to her grave and so we were able to tell MIL and FIL. We were not able to tell my own family yet since they're the opposite and will have to wait until 'everyone' is told.

My MIL has been surprisingly good about not coming in to heavy with opinions, has been really positive and helpful and just generally supportive. I just adore her. My own mom will be great once she is in the know... I just wish she could keep a secret.

sschoonmaker

My MIL is amazing.  I started dating DH in high school and right away I felt part of the family.  After eight years of being with DH, I can't think of anything negative about my MIL.  They say that men fall in love with women that are like their mothers and that is so true in our case.  His mother and I have so many common interests and get along great.

greeneyed_bride

The thing I appreciate about my MIL - she lives 900 miles away.

We have had a pretty bad relationship (long story), and DH and I think she legitimately has a personality disorder of some sort.

tak2002

Hmm...she doesn't visit often. I love that about her.

Feb3

My mom said she would be with us when DD was born and then flaked at the last minute, so MIL flew in from out of state to take her place.  She was in the delivery room.  She thinks I'm fabulous - I know because she tells me all the time!  My step-MIL is also wonderful.  Fun to be with, supportive, and never one to step on our toes.  So I've been lucky in the in-laws department.  (My own mother, not so much!)

cathom7

My MIL, in general, is just a super kind and helpful person.  My Mom is not in the best health, and so when she comes to visit or help, it is REALLY AWESOME HELP!!  She tells me DS and I saved her son's life and he was so lonely without us;0)  I feel comfortable enough with her to go to visit for a week with DS, even tho hubs is at home working.  She ADORES DS(of course;0) and when we come to visit, she has me send a list of things for us to have when we get there, to make things easier....  She's just awesome.

Daisy07gray

I love my MIL-- but they don't know yet!!  We'll tell them no matter the outcome of this pregnancy... and she's very fiercly loving of her family.  I am grateful that she has raised my husband and youngest BIL. 

We'll see how she does this weekend- I'm really excited to share!