cafe press stuff

jennyjaws

Not sure if any of you are familiar with the cafe press site but they have really funny shirts/mugs/hats etc.  They have a great IF line and I purchased a shirt for my cousin's new baby that says "My parents did IVF and all they can afford is this lousy t-shirt"

Mrs.McIrish

Obviously you know your cousin's humor level etc but as someone going through IVF, I don't find this funny. Sorry.

jennyjaws

Oh, well, I am very sorry.  I did not mean to offend anyone.  My cousin has had 2 rounds of IVF and finally conceived.  Her and her husband do have a good sense of humor and we are a very close knit group.  I guess it just depends on the person. 

jennyjaws

I guess I will close my account.  I was worried that I would not fit in with the boards.  You either have to have a long standing relationship with everyone or keep your mouth shut and stay a lurker.  I guess I will not do either.  Hope everyone has their BFP soon.

jennasita

I understand where you're coming from because I felt the same way about a year ago when I was here. I'm back now after taking that long break. Please don't leave because someone made one comment because we really are here to support one another. It's true that we're not all alike and we're all in different places, but we can help one another.

I will say that the over 35 boards are much more welcoming than some of the others and I think that's because we're older and more mature. Having said that, I think we're all (even the under 35s) very sensitive people because of our circumstances. Hormones are flying everywhere. Stress is getting to us.

We should all try to be more aware of hurting others, I think. Every one of us. 

lindaeverly

I agree with both ladies above.  Most of the women on this board have unfortunately been through so much emotionally that it's hard to see things like that.  I know that it was meant in good humor, but we are pretty sensative.  On the other hand of that, being sensative does make us more supportive when we're going through the tough stuff.  We don't blast people like I've seen on other boards.  We can voice our objections in a polite way & still be supportive when needed.

Mrs.McIrish

I just gave my opinion and said you know your cousin's sense of humor etc and whether it would go over well. My comment wasn't nasty etc. Just that I didn't think it was funny if someone gave me the shirt. No need to close your account for one comment.

ELF4321

jennyjaws:

I guess I will close my account.  I was worried that I would not fit in with the boards.  You either have to have a long standing relationship with everyone or keep your mouth shut and stay a lurker.  I guess I will not do either.  Hope everyone has their BFP soon.

 

Seriously?  She didn't even say anything bad to you, just that she didn't find it funny.  I'm totally puzzled by why you would take it as mean or whatever. 

ELF4321

Mrs.McIrish:

I just gave my opinion and said you know your cousin's sense of humor etc and whether it would go over well. My comment wasn't nasty etc. Just that I didn't think it was funny if someone gave me the shirt. No need to close your account for one comment.

Yeah, you're definitely NOT the one being overly-sensitive in this situation. 

ELF4321

Oh, and for the record, I looked at some of the Cafe Press stuff and think it's pretty funny.  I especially like the baby onesie that says "My dad is a wanker". 

Country Girl in the City

If one of my cousins bought me that shirt, my feelings would be really hurt.  However, I am not close to my cousins.  However, should I ever have a baby I saw a onesie that says " my parents spent my college fund making me" that I think would be cute.

I think that for me, no one else can joke about my IF (including DH some of the time) but I will make jokes about it.

arevere

Please don't feel you need to close your account because of one person's comment. She was just being honest about how she felt. Everyone has different tastes and senses of humor.

Just FYI though, this is a board for anyone over 35, a lot of women here are also going through IF, and some of us are also trying for our 1st. So basically we're a bunch of over-sensitive nut jobs, strung out on IF meds and hungry for the blood of newbies. JK : )

Srsly though, no one on this board is snarky or mean. Sometimes we're blunt or brutally honest, but everyone needs a little bit of that in their life.Stick around and you'll get tons of positive feedback and support.

 

Country Girl in the City

arevere:

Please don't feel you need to close your account because of one person's comment. She was just being honest about how she felt. Everyone has different tastes and senses of humor.

Just FYI though, this is a board for anyone over 35, a lot of women here are also going through IF, and some of us are also trying for our 1st. So basically we're a bunch of over-sensitive nut jobs, strung out on IF meds and hungry for the blood of newbies. JK : )

Srsly though, no one on this board is snarky or mean. Sometimes we're blunt or brutally honest, but everyone needs a little bit of that in their life.Stick around and you'll get tons of positive feedback and support.

 

That was well said.

lindaeverly

I agree with everything said above!  You ladies are some of the most wonderful people that I have ever "met".  You know the worst of all of this & also know that we're all here for each other. 

lhcooper

Just to add a little to everything said above: OP, you do have to realize that most of us here haven't even gotten to the point where we can find IVF jokes funny; we're just desperate for IVF to work, period.  It would be really great if I could imagine actually having a baby as a result of IVF and so wanting to buy funny onesies for him/her, but my first and only IVF cycle just failed, and I am not going to *have* a baby to give any such shirt to, at least not through IVF and maybe not ever.  And McIrish, who is one of the most lovely and supportive people on this board, is in the middle of her first IVF cycle and desperately anxious for it to work.  In other words, we can all think about baby gear once we HAVE babies, if you see what I mean, but it's really hard to let ourselves go there before then while we're in the middle of this total hell.  So while I can see why you thought this was funny, it might have been funnier on the PAIF board where everyone can relax just a little bit about this kind of thing.  That doesn't mean you're not welcome here, and it doesn't mean you should close your account, unless of course that's what you really want to do.  This is the one board, in my experience, where snarkiness really never, ever happens; McIrish was not being snarky, she was just letting you know that the very thought of that kind of thing right now is not funny to her; she might also have been unconsciously suggesting that that kind of humor doesn't fit for many of us on this board right now.  I know it can be hard when someone doesn't find funny what you do, but I would try not to take offense if you can.

lindaeverly

lhcooper:

And McIrish, who is one of the most lovely and supportive people on this board

This!!!!!  McIrish is the farthest thing from snarky that you can get!!!!  Even when she is in the middle of her own treatments & dealing with all of the emotions that it brings, she finds a way to lend support to those of us who need it! 

boymamaco

Don't let the comments of one person, no matter if they are truly snarky or not, cause you to close your account. It's a message board and people can say anything they want... and remember, we are all strangers and each have our own opinions and experiences. Yes many of us have developed relationships but this board in particular is not cliquey and is very welcoming to newbies.

hav2run

Honestly, I think your post is harmless.  I have seen much worse in my years spent on this board.  I didn't see any humor in the post, but really got the point of the T shirt.  If I had an IVF babe, then I might get it more than I do right now.  But I am not going to convict you for posting something that you thought might be relevant in the name of evoking a chuckle.  You almost got one from me, but I have been on a hiatus for a bit to clear my head. Others aren't in that position, so it is easy to see where they might be a little bent about it. 

You should not delete your account.  Just lurk in a bit and post when you feel like you have an understanding of the board.  Definitely, definitely do that if you post anywhere outside of this board.  This one is the tamest of all of the boards here.  Everyone fits in, and gets along well here.  It has been that way since they created the board in 2007.  Just give it time.  You are welcome here. 

Classicoyote

lindaeverly:

lhcooper:

And McIrish, who is one of the most lovely and supportive people on this board

This!!!!!  McIrish is the farthest thing from snarky that you can get!!!!  Even when she is in the middle of her own treatments & dealing with all of the emotions that it brings, she finds a way to lend support to those of us who need it! 

I agree - McIrish is one of the warmest, understanding women on this board.  She has always been there with helpful advice no matter what is going on in her world.  She is a wonderful lady.  She makes everyone feel welcome.  Just give it chance.  It took me a while to start chiming in too but I was so glad once I did.  This is a great board.