Random lonely Sat night thoughts...Anyone want to play?
Mrs.McIrish
member
So DH is at work tonight and I'm home alone with my random thoughts:
- a year ago I took my last BCP. What a joke that turned out to be!
-if I bought the VIP 1 yr pass for fertility friend, it would now be expired and I'm still not pg. Good thing I didn't bother!
-why am I getting strange shooting pains in my left ovary since starting stims Yesterday? It is too soon for anything to be massive in there. I am also crazy thirsty!
-I watched Real Housewives of NYC on my DVR. Seriously, Ramona, you thought you were KU at 55 because you were late?
Any random thoughts to share??
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
Re: Random lonely Sat night thoughts...Anyone want to play?
Random thoughts....
On my vacation I went to Universal Studios in Orlando. While I was there I spotted an E.T. doll in a gift shop that looked like a "baby" E.T. I bought it and slept with it every night. I also brought it on the plane in my carry on.. you know so he wouldn't be stuck in my suit case. I am 39.
Today I went to the grocery store and I paused in the baby aisle--like I always do. I just wanted to buy those tiny newborn diapers SO badly. I was actually trying to justify why it was a good idea to buy them.. seriously.
Also my much younger cousin just announced the birth of her 3rd baby... a beautiful baby girl. Jealous? ME? No way..
I just got home from dinner with a friend from grad school. They have 2 boys -- 5 and 7. My friend's wife told me that their oldest was born when she was 34, after 6 IUIs. This made me very hopeful...
And then my friend asked if he could stay with me and my husband (in our one bedroom apartment, the last week that we have together before I return to Philadelphia, and during what should be my fertile window) for the five days between his dissertation defense and when he has to have corrections in. I love him, and understand his situation, but I really want to tell him no.
Time flies, and not in a good way.
PS: I am really really hopeful for your IVF, McIrish! Good luck!
- Why do I have another headache? I've been having a ton of headaches lately and they are annoying.
- I seem to be spending too much time on The Bump lately.
- Can't believe I'm going on a business trip for 4 nights this week (Wed - Sun). WTF is that all about? At least I can Bump in my hotel room and not annoy DF with my late night typing.
- Why do I feel like this cycle isn't going to work and I haven't even started the meds. What is the point of doing it if I'm not confident it will work?
- I've always been an emotional eater. This past year I've put on over 20 pounds. I'm back up and should update my weight loss ticker. I really can't afford to let loosing Lucy result in another major weight gain.
- I miss Lucy more than I ever knew I would.
That is hysterical!!! I bought my 2yr old niece a stuffed moose in Maine this week because I loved it. It had pink and purple butterflies all over it. You definitely have me beat! LOL.
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
OMG, I missed this. I am so heartbroken for you Betsy! Do you know what happened? I am soooooo sorry. How old was she?
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
I felt like I talked about it so much on 3T that I'm not sure I updated it here. We had to put her down last night. I'm just devasted. We both are really. The biopsy came back on Thursday that it was GI Lymphoma. While we were shocked (previous ultrasounds showed no signs and the specialist said he was 98% certain it wasnt lymphoma) the diagnosis made sense since she wasn't responding to any of the meds for IBD. She was getting more and more sick each day, and we knew we didn't have much time left with her. I stayed home from work on Friday and snuggled her the entire day. We are heart broken. It's been quite the year in our household. Ready for some good fortune to come our way (and for all the other ladies of TTC @ 35).
I remember how monumental it seemed when we stopped using them back in 2009! Total non-event!
My random thoughts:
- I don't mind paying for IVF nearly as much as DH does, because it's his "new car" fund that we're using. His car is still running fine and we just put a boat-load of $ into it the last couple of years, so I think he needs to keep driving it a few more years even though he totally hates it!
- On the paying for IVF front, I wish we had known we were going to need IVF a year ago, when DH's old company's insurance would have actually paid for it, unlike the new company.
- I have been out of work for almost a year and I don't even really want to find a new job because I'm afraid that will be like admitting that we're not going to be successful in our ttc efforts and I'll never get to be a SAHM like I want to be.
- Okay, that last thought was depressing and now I need to think of something less depressing so I don't end up crying myself to sleep tonight.
- I just kicked DH's a$$ at cards. I'm glad he's not a sore loser like I am when I lose.
There, that's better.
I must have missed it over on 3T. I'm really sorry to hear about this. My doggy is 11 and starting to show his age alot the last year or so. I live in dread of the day we have to make that decision. So sad for you.
Oh, I am so sorry honey. I have been through this several times and it really tough. My pets have always been my family. It is so hard. My Riley is 19 so I know our time together is getting there. I can't stand to think of it. You really have had a rotten year with terrible losses. Take care of yourself any way you can right now.
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
Thanks. I'm trying to not drown my sorrows in cupcakes, cookies and frozen yogurt.
But sometimes are easier than others. I think I prepared myself for it better than DH but I was more involved with the vets, specialists and administering meds on/off over the last two months. She was only 8 so we thought we had a lot more time with her.
Give your Riley a bunch of lovin' tonight!
I'll play!
Why am I having random pangs of pain in my uterus? And why have my hands been numb off and on all day? If these are side effects from Clomid, shouldn't they be done by now, I'm 13 dpIUI. Weird.
Why can't DH and I go one weekend without having a fight. I'm feeling crabby and PMSy. What's his excuse? : )
I'm worried about my fur baby. He has to go in for a teeth cleaning on Monday, and they might have to extract a tooth. He's only 2. Is it normal for a dog to have bad teeth at 2?
Today was the nicest day we've had in NYC for weeks. Not too hot, breezy and sunny. We we to the flea market and ate gourmet popsicles. Yum!
Oh, I missed this too! I am so, so sorry, lucyspeople. I am sure that you will miss her terribly for some time to come, but I'm also sure that Lucy enjoyed her time with you and you did the best you could for her.
I know how much the comfort of my dog has meant to me in the past year of IF struggles, and watching him decline from old age is killing me slowly.
Me: 36, DH: 42
Dx: DOR and MFI
DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal
IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!
SAIFW/PAIFW
Oh Honey I am so sorry to hear about Lucy. My dog is 12 and in really bad health, she has Cushing Disease and I know I will have to make the decision soon too and it just breaks my heart. Just know that you did the very best for her and she was extremely lucky to have you as a mommy. (((huge hugs)))