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Baby Showers
Requesting guests bring book to shower
Can anyone please tell me if it's acceptable to request that guests bring a book for the baby to start his library on the shower invitation? I am a very excited expectant grandma but would never do anything to embarrass my daughter. Thanks for your help :-)
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Re: Requesting guests bring book to shower
My experience has been that a lot of new moms and moms-to-be think it's a terrific idea, and a lot of shower guests not in those categories feel imposed upon.
I know people say you can get a little book for $5 or whatever, but if I'm getting someone a book it's not going to be from the dollar store.
The way to accommodate everyone is to host a book shower.
I'm not big on requesting any specific gift whether it be diapers, books, etc etc. When I shop for a shower, I have a specific price point in mind. If you asked me to bring a book, I would subtract that from the rest of the gift.
If your daughter wants to get books, she should add some to her registry and hope they get purchased. Much better, IMO than specifically requesting them.
Breastfeeding and pregnant!
I did this as well. I put several books on my registry and got them and plenty plenty more. No one had to say anything about bringing a book, people just bought off of the registry or bought books that they thought I would enjoy.
Again, some people don't appreciate being told what to bring even if it is just a book instead of a card. Others are totally fine with it though.
If anyone has a problem bringing a book worth a few dollars because they don't like being "told" what to bring, then they should keep their cheap petty behinds at home. I see no problem with it, knowing that it is something that can be used repeatedly and will contribute to the childs education. I believe it is totally different than a diaper raffle in that aspect. If they are going to be that stingy then they can deduct the cost of the book from their original gift and go with something cheaper. I'd much rather be asked to bring a book than go on someones registry to see their needs consist of $2,000 worth of nursery furniture as a "wish list". Buy your own damn cribs.
Just my opinion of course. There are some ladies on here who will spend weeks being offended at the audacity of being asked to "please bring a book" to a shower.
my sister is hosting my shower. it was pretty much a complete surprise to me when i saw a little poem on there about bringing a used childrenss book onstead of a card and tbh kind of made me cringe. apparently my guests think itss a great idea though so as pps said there are mixed feelings. i think the only thing that in my mind made it sort of okay is the request for used books instead of new.
although i love the general idea of it the thought of asking guests to bring books in addition to a present seems rude.
not so sure this is a good generalization. although i put my crib and carseat and more expensive items on my registry i did it solely for the completion coupon aspect. not everyone expects things like that to be bought. i know i sure dont.
We just put a note on our registries that we would also greatly appreciate books to add to our little one's library. Many guests did bring several books, or a book in addition to their gift and it was really nice.
You could put a note on the invite "A and B are registered at Babies R Us, and would also appreciate children's books for Baby C's library!"
How much is this completion coupon worth that you are willing to risk your dignity by asking your family & friends to buy big ticket items? I understand the concept but it cracks me up when someone is outraged about being asked to bring a book, then registers for everything under the sun. It makes no sense. If someone cannot afford the big ticket items without asking others to help, then maybe they shouldn't be having babies?
No, just comparing tit for tat. The logic does not make sense.
" I understand the concept but it cracks me up when someone is outraged about being asked to bring a book, then registers for everything under the sun."
I think you're mistaking annoyance for outrage.
Besides, think of the children who won't ever learn to read if they don't get books before they're born!
OP, this isn't directed at you, however, unless you are specifically having a book shower, I would leave requests for specific items off of the registry.
If someone wants to give a book, they'll give a book without being told to do so.
Everyone on here seems to complain about shower guests going off registry and giving something they like that the mother to be hasn't approved of, then they ask those same shower guests to do exactly what they *** about in the first place, but now because you are telling them to do it it's ok? I'd hate to hear what happens after the shower when you get a book from an author you don't like or if the cover doesn't match the room decor.
And, no amount of books in your house is going to help that child if the parents don't read to them. Or are you going to ask that the person who gave the book come over and read to the child as well. A child can learn just as much with 3 books and/or a library card and parents who care, they don't need hundreds.
So you're telling me that you're more offended to see something expensive a child needs (such as a car seat or crib) on a registry where the parents can use their completion discount to save literally hundreds of dollars (depending on how much is left to buy) than to be asked/told to buy something that, in theory, the parents can provide to their children FOR FREE with a simple trip to the library?
You hope we're ok with offending our friends and family by asking for high ticket items (which, when purchased, are often bought by large groups of people who all chip in a few dollars towards something significant than spent on stupid stuff)?
Every time I think your argument can't get any more ridiculous, you go and outdo yourself.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
To the OP (because I was distracted by the trainwreck):
If you want books, register for them. People who want to buy you books will buy you books. People who want to buy you a card will buy you a card. People who want to buy you a stroller will buy you a stroller.
It's tacky to make a registry of things you'd like and then say, basically, "oh and you need to buy me a book too! Kthxbai"
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
More power to you, give a book instead of a card whether it's requested or not. I'm sure the mother and father would be appreciative!
I'm not saying that to be snarky, if you want to do it, do it. And I don't necessarily disagree with you, I just don't need to me told how to spend my money, I'm an adult.
If you think your DD would like books for her LO then ask her to register for them.
Personally I always include a book anyway...but usually only in the $5-8 price range because I buy something off the registry and then always - always an outfit. I can't resist! LOL I never buy newborn size or even 0-3...I think of the season and size. Babies get so many tiny little outfits.
As for the book instead of a card...I never follow that "command". I will get the book...but I will also get a card and I write in the card. I just cannot bring myself to deface a book by writing in it. Besides what if MTB gets more then one of the same book...can't take it back if it is written in and can't give it to someone else either.
BTW...I kept all the cards we were given the first year of my LO's life. I have already donated a lot of the books that they have outgrown.
I'm from NJ (born and raised) and I had never heard of a wishing well.
Really?! That's so funny! It's basically just a spot for smaller gifts that people get aside from the real gift, and by small I mean under $5, maybe a bit more, but rarely. I think I've only been to 1 or 2 showers that didn't have one of some form.. I've been to weddings with wine themed wishing wells, baby showers with book themed wishing wells, etc.
This exactly!
At my friend's shower, her family and friends asked us to bring a book instead of a card and I was fine with it. I bought Goodnight Moon at Walmart for like $4. I also think my mom and other family wrote something about bringing a book on my shower invite and I am not embarrassed at all by it.
What? How did you get "I put the big ticket items (car seat, crib, and mattress) on my registry because I want to use the completion coupon for them" and turn it into "I cannot afford to buy things for my child"?
When we registered, we were told that we'd get a 10% off coupon for the completion one, plus we could combine it with a 20% off coupon we were likely to get, and if we signed up for the BRU card we'd get another 10% off. I'd say it's worth it to us to have 40% off. Which, to me, is a good amount.
I'm pretty sure I SPECIFICALLY said we don't expect friends and family to buy our big ticket items (all whopping three we have on there), and so I'm just not sure how you turned that around. Only about 10 people are going to be coming to my shower, and they all understand that I don't expect them to buy my crib, the carseat, or the mattress. Your annoyance at that statement is a little ridiculous.
This. I'm from PA and it's commonplace to have things like this. It's not offensive at all. You aren't throwing your shower, so you can't dictate what the invitation says. However, to the original poster who asked the question - where I am from, it's not uncommon AT ALL to add that to the invitation, AS WELL AS where the mom to be is registered. People want to know. I say go for it.
THIS!
I have never met anyone who was disgusted at the "please bring a book in lieu of a card" mention. Literacy in every sense is imperative for a successful school and work career; starting a child's love of reading early will only help them.
When my best friend was expecting, her mother-in-law and sister-in-law held a "book themed" shower with the request of a book. It was a wonderful idea (I was jealous; I teach high school English), but my friend and her husband hate reading. Afterward, my friend commeted, "I don't know why they did that; we hate reading and don't have plans to read to the baby." If that is the case, I'd say forgo the idea of a book.
Who is going to argue against the education of a child?
You contradict yourself and prove a point that I always make in these threads.
And no one here, not even the most adamant against requesting a book on an invitation, has ever said they are against the education of a child.
I've thrown quite a few baby showers and in/on the invitation I add list 3 things to bring (book included) to have a chance to enter into a raffle.
How i did it is if they brought one of the 5 things i put there name in a jar and at the end of the shower the expecting mommy drew a name and that person got a price! 
You could do it just for books but if you wanted I always listed books, diapers or wipes.
HOpe that helps!
If you're asking them to bring a registry gift + a book + diapers + wipes, I think they've had enough prices for awhile.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
What does that mean that the person got a price? That they are worth $50 so they clearly love the baby more than the person that's only worth $10?
Well that would make more sense, wouldn't it...
I completely agree. I have been to a few baby showers requesting a book and loved the idea. I am doing it at my shower too.