Confirmation. :(

mamarazzi

She's completely deaf. 

Her deaf ed teacher, H and I had suspected it for awhile, but her other tests had come back normal.  Her ENT blew us off, but we pushed for additional testing.  She had a "behavioral" hearing test today.  The goal was to get her to look toward the noise.  Not only did she not do that, when they looked at her physical response (eyes widening, blinking, sucking faster or slower on her binky, startling, etc.), she didn't flinch at a single sound - not even the ones that had me wincing.

The audiologist said it has to be neurological.  The next step is another sedated ABR just to see if there's something the first audiologist missed and an MRI.  We've been doing some signs with her already, but I'm taking an intensive class at the end of the month and we'll be trying to incorporate more and more signing with our conversations.

I had a minor meltdown, but I'm still in a bit of shock.  I mean, we suspected it, but knowing for sure that she hears nothing is a pretty big blow. 

shopgirl_07

I am so sorry.

melmax

I'm sorry. 

ridesbuttons

That is a big blow.  And I'm not going to offer any 'but at least...' or anything else.

Take whatever help and support you can get for yourself right now.  Do whatever feels right for yourself right now. 

Temp970088312507122

So sorry.

meghans30

I'm so sorry. 

Rebekah1021

I'm so sorry. (((Hugs)))

sunshiny79

I'm really sorry to hear that. I know it seems tough now but you all will learn signs so fast and she'll probably catch on quick too.

I went to school with two deaf girls and we all took classes so that we could communicate with them. They went to all of our regular classes and had an interpreter with them at all times. They never missed out on anything

 

MomToMaia1

((HUGS))

r9stedt

Oh honey... 

I'm so glad that she has proactive parents like you.  

 

monchichi

I'm really sorry--that must be difficult news to get.  One of my most well rounded students EVER was profoundly deaf.  He was in so many activities that it was crazy...including 3 different sports.  Your daughter is very lucky to have you

belle204

(((hugs))) girl.

july05bride2

sorry to hear that.  our youngest has a hearing loss in one ear and it too came as a total shock as well.  take some time for yourself and your family.  btw....as a teacher i have seen some awesome kids who have done well with cochlear implants.  let me know if you want to share the stories with you!

kac831

I frequent on another board, but i hope you don't mind me commenting.

I'm sorry, it is so hard to hear that diagnosis. As an Audiologist I hope I can offer another insight.  

 Has no one mentioned a cochlear implant? Children that are implanted early (around age 1-2) can often develop speech and language and enter kindergarten in a regular classroom.  The outcomes of children implanted with CIs is much impacted by implantation age. The younger the better, thus allowing them exposure to speech and language and with therapy, help them right on tract with language development.  Signing is great for the meantime, but I would not view this as a long term solution. Sign language is fine if you live within a deaf community, but replying on this as her primary form of communication will limit her opportunities. Many parents struggle with letting their child have the choice to have a cochlear implant. Unfortunately the reality is is a child is born deaf, the success rate of the implant really is related to age of implantation.  Waiting even until age 5+ can severely impact the success of language development.  A cochlear implant is an great example of what technology can offer.  It is amazing to think a child born with profound hearing impairment has the opportunity to hear and lead a life of hearing .  

I'm sorry for her diagnosis, it is a lot to take in! Find a good audiologist who can go over all of her options.  She has many, and it will all turn out fine.  Good luck!  

tammy79

I'm so sorry ;(.

Jamaica_Bride

when i open this post i want to send my condolences to you.

 

but then i thought about it.

 

you are an amazing mom to an amazing daughter, period. she is so lucky to have you as her mom- it really is a blessing. 

 whether our babies are deaf, lost before birth, special needs...they are our babies. we love and adore them for who they ARE not what they were supposed to be. 

 

( i do want to send you huge hugs. hearing that our babies aren't totally perfect i hard to hear. we're all here for you in all your successes and bumps in the road.) 

Marchmamma

Hugs.  I am so sorry.

happ17

aw hun, I'm so sorry

AnneUCSB

Huge hugs, Jess.  I am so sorry

Mrs.Tony

I'm very sorry : (

sunandsand

She's a beautiful girl and lucky to have you! *hugs*

lizard76

I'm so sorry.  That had to be hard news to take.

(On a somewhat random note, every time I see the picture of her, it makes me smile.  She's a beauty.)

JellymanKelly

I'm so sorry. I know it's little consolation to you now, but my cousin is completely deaf. She has had a wonderful, full life. She's done basically everything everyone else does, and she's happily married with 4 beautiful children. She's been able to have such a great life because she had wonderful parents who advocated for her at every step. I know little Ruby will have the same kind of life because you'll be there fighting for her.

Mominator

I'm sorry

BubblyToes

Oh girl, I am sorry to hear that.  But like I said before, I am so not worried about Ruby.  She's gonna be just fine. 

(((HUGS)))

cooker71

BubblyToes:

Oh girl, I am sorry to hear that.  But like I said before, I am so not worried about Ruby.  She's gonna be just fine. 

(((HUGS)))

Yup. This. But extra *hugs* since I know how shocking it can be to get a diagnosis about your child like that. If you ever want to talk or just vent, PM me. 

beanzer

Sorry Jess. ?Hugs to you!

Yodajo

(((hugs)))

You have a little diversion in your expected path, but everything is going to be alright. 

Temp374386125003286

Hugs!!

Purrrfect433

I'm sorry, jess! But...what an amazing gift it will be for your family to learn sign language and become a part of the deaf community. Silver lining and all that... As a mother of a special-needs child i totally get the spectrum of emotion you're feeling:( you're amazing, though, and Ruby entered your life because you and your family are exactly who she needs to become the amazing person she's sure to become:) Chin up, girl.

Angela814

((Hugs)) I can't imagine how hard it must be to hear that your child will have extra challenges in life. She is lucky to have you to fight for her.

mamarazzi

Thanks everyone for all the responses.  I'm so glad to have this place for support.

I don't feel sorry for myself.  I don't even really feel sorry for Ruby.  I just hate to think of other people making her feel different.  The world is cruel and I hate that she'll have to deal with more than an average kid.

At nearly 6 months old, I can already tell she's destined for great things (I know that's so cliche', but I truly believe it).  She's an amazing little girl with a huge personality.  She so charming and sweet.  I'm so proud to be her mama.

Really, right now, I just feel a bit helpless.  I desperately want to learn sign language RIGHT NOW so I'm armed with the tools I need to communicate with her.  I hate thinking that she might feel left out.

To the PP who mentioned the cochlear implants: yes, we've been informed about them.  However, at this stage in the game, we aren't considering them.  While we realize what amazing technology it is and how much it has helped deaf children, we're just not sure they're for our daughter/family.  We don't think of her as needing to be "fixed" to be like everyone else.  At this point, we feel like she can have just as wonderful and fulfilling of a life without CIs as she could with them.  They don't always work, the long-term effects aren't know and they would damage her ear(s), which are currently perfect structurally.  We're not completely ruling them out and we absolutely see the attraction to them, but they aren't our first line of defense.  We don't want to rely on technology that may not even help her.  I appreciate the info, though.

I'm so, so thankful for Ruby's deaf educator.  She offered to join us at the test today and was a great support.  She's been so amazing over the past few months and I feel really confident in her helping Ruby learn everything she needs to to reach her full potential.  I don't know how we'd be getting through it without her.

jettagurl

Hugs to you, Mama. What a rough road - but you got this.  You and R will rock this.  And in your 'moments', we'll be here to listen. 

 

amiamish

(((((hugs)))))) I'm sorry.

eclaires

hugs, chica!  you will rock this - I have faith in you and little Miss Ruby.

CubbyMama

Hugs! That has to be really hard and it sounds like you're dealing with it as well as anyone could. She is beautiful and one day this will have become just a small part of who she is, but now I'm sure it's overwhelming. This s a totally random comment, but I have NKOTB on the brain and Joe McIntyre and his wife found out when their middle child was an infant that he has profound hearing loss. They've done some interviews about how shocking it was and their experience to date (I think he's 3ish years old now?) if you have any interest in their story. Again, hugs!

UGAbride

I am sorry, I know it must be a lot to process (just that your child will have additional challenges in life).  Hearing this particular diagnosis hits very close to home for me since I have a severe, unexplained hearing loss myself, and have always wondered if my children would.  Ruby is so lucky to have you as her mother, and she is so going to have a wonderful life!

xnbride

I am sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you. She is a beautiful little girl and you are a wonderful mom. Everything is going to be ok. Big hugs.

rebs

Hugs to you! Ruby is one lucky little girl to have you as parents.

acppa

I'm so sorry  

Starr57

It's so hard to hear that something is 'wrong' with our kids... It's like a personal attack. Take time to digest it all. You have a wonderful outlook on it and I commend you for taking everything in stride. Good luck to you and your family!