how to handle sister/her badly behaved dog around LO?

ms12345

Whenever my sister visits home, she brings her dog (to my parents' house, not mine, thankfully). But of course, I want to see her and will go to my parents' house when she's there. The problem though is that she (nor my parents) see any issue with her badly behaved dog around my DD. They yell at ME for yelling at the dog whenever he goes near DD.

For the record, he's not *mean* per se, but if DD is in reach, his nose and tongue are ALL OVER her (ewwww). He's also 60 pounds and lumbering... if he hears even the wind knocking the front door, he howls and bolts around like a crazed animal. That makes me SUPER nervous, especially since DD is getting to the age where she wants to play on the floor and not be held all the time. He's also a terrible food thief... at Christmas (before DD was born), I literally went thru about 3-4 not even half-eaten plates of food because no matter what I did, his nose got on to my plate. I can totally see him snatching food out of DD's hands when she's more into solids (puffs, Cheerios, etc). He just doesn't listen at ALL. He's also the type to be all up in your crotch whenever he can, which pisses me off.

Yet I'm the bad guy when I get upset about him being around DD. If he was well-mannered, it wouldn't matter. But he's AWFUL. And I'm the one who gets yelled at like I'm crazy whenever I attempt to reprimand him, or when I ask my sister (or my parents) to keep him away from me and DD.

I'm at a total loss of what to do. They think I'm just "overreacting" because I've never liked animals, but seriously, if he was well-mannered (like my parents' golden retriever) it wouldn't matter at all to me. I get blown off if I even remotely make a complaint against him. (My mom accused me of being "hormonal" when I got pissed about him stealing a ton of food from me at Christmas.) I feel like I can't talk to anyone about it, meanwhile I just want to protect my DD (and see my sister, who I only see once every few months because she lives 6-7 hours away)!

christyp80

Hmmm...I'm not really a dog person, so I get where you're coming from.  However, I can see why a dog lover would say you're overreacting.  I think if the dog is doing anything dangerous to your baby, you completely have the right to ask your sister to let the dog outside, or to not go to your parents' house.  But if the dog is eating cheerios off the ground that your baby drops, I don't see that it's a big deal. 

Is your DD scared of the dog?  When he runs by, when he barks, when he licks her?  If not, I'd probably try to accept the situation.  Sometimes it seems that animals have a good sense of "baby" whether it's a human or a puppy, and they're actually very careful around them, even if they seem like they're out of control.  My cats will run at a million miles an hour right past Audrey when she's on the floor, but they've never gotten close enough to touch her.

LadybugPicnic2011

My dog loves ladybug, but she goes crazy when there is a tennis ball or when her "puppy friends"are over, typically I just sit on the floor next to ladybug and play "guard" just in case she gets too excited.  Is there any way you and your sister can sit on the floor, and form a kind of fence. From what I am reading, it sounds like a combo of you not liking animals (it seems like you admited this) and her dog needing to be trained a little better.  Could you invite your sister out to lunch or something, so she leaves the dog at your parents house?

TiffanyTheMom

Push him away from you. Kick. Yell at the dog. (And I didn't mean a karate kick, just like a 'put your foot up on him and push' kick.) I wouldn't sit there and let a giant slobbery beast be all over my kid. Whether or not I like dogs has nothing to do with the fact I/ don't/ want/ this/ thing/ up/ on/ my/ baby. Let your mom and sister think you're over reacting. Or, invite her to your baby-proofed, dog-free house.

sparkelz

I can relate to your post. SIL has a horribly untrained Italian Greyhound that jumps, licks, nips, and overall is a pain in the neck. She never trained the dog never will; now she has another dog (much bigger mixed breed) and doesn?t take very good care of her either. SIL lives next door to MIL/FIL and the dog is often at their house so that she doesn?t have to deal with it. The last time we were their the dog came up to LO?s car seat when we got their and wanted to sniff/lick her, I pushed him away and took her out and held her so that she couldn?t get to her. His teeth are rotten and I didn?t want his mouth anywhere near LO. DH thought I was over reacting but the dog has been known to nip at people and I wasn?t taking a chance with LO.

 

For me protecting LO is my number one priority so in your case I would either not care if everyone was mad about me yelling at/keeping the dog away from LO or I wouldn?t go over there when the dog was around and I would make sure that they knew why. For me LO?s safety is more important then hurting someone?s feelings because I won?t tolerate their dogs unruly behaviors.    

ms12345

TiffanyTheMom:

Whether or not I like dogs has nothing to do with the fact I/ don't/ want/ this/ thing/ up/ on/ my/ baby.

TiffanyTheMom, ILY. Seriously. You're a mind reader LOL.

When DD is older and can say whether or not she wants a dog all over her is a different story, but for now, it's up to me and DH (who fully agrees) to protect her from a 60 pound boundary-less dog who doesn't know his own size and steals food straight from your hands and plate (dropping food is a different story... like a pp said, that's fair game).

Even though I'm not a dog lover, I have no problem with fully trained well-mannered dogs... my parents' dog is AMAZING with DD. Their dog even knows the command "no face!" so she won't lick DD's face (when you say "no face!" she'll sniff DD on the back of the head instead!). They're really good at training, their old dog was the same way with babies and kids.

I was just thinking about this issue now because DD is really starting to get mobile and to the point where she doesn't want to be held a lot. Therefore, more floor time, which then means more chance for my sister's dog to overstep boundaries. The holidays are gonna be a nightmare.