Those TTC, PG, or have more than one child...

cutelilme1210

DH and I are thinking about TTC next month. DD will be 14 months old. We want our children 2-3 years apart. We are both on board and want another one. I am just having a little bit of a hard time imaging another one. I cannot imagine loving another one the way I love DD. I know that I will and I know it will all fall into place. I was just curious if you guys felt the same way. TIA!

greengirl0909

I worried a little bit about this, but ultimately I've always pictured myself with several kids, so we went ahead with it.  My sister and I fought some as kids, but now she's one of my best friends. I'm glad to be giving the same gift to my son.

I had a friend put it in good perspective.  When someone has twins, you never hear anyone talk about, oh one of them won't be loved as much or anything like that.  I think, good point!

llc730

Just got my BFP last week. We haven't even told family yet. We were TTC so very excited, but I definitely have mixed feelings. I am a part time SAHM so it has been just me and DD for what seems like forever. However, I figure I have about 8.5 months to get used to the idea.

Alexandra*sMom

We always wanted more than one child.  I heard people say that they couldn't imagine loving a child more than #1 - but I never thought that.  I honestly knew I would love all my children.  

For me, the first 6 weeks of having 2 kids was tough on me.  #1 was and still is my most spirited child.  Everytime I nursed the baby, she'd get into things (put vicks, lotions, everything up and out of reach NOW!).  She is also a natural climber, so on top of the dresser didn't work, the top of the closet did. 

What else??  Going from 2 to 3 was a peice of cake.  I was out solo with all 3 kids in a week. 

Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha

I didn't really feel that way when we were TTC, but now that LO#2 is almost here, I am feeling quite a bit of anxiety regarding that very topic. Totally normal in my opinion.

cutelilme1210

guppysown@yahoo.com:

I worried a little bit about this, but ultimately I've always pictured myself with several kids, so we went ahead with it.  My sister and I fought some as kids, but now she's one of my best friends. I'm glad to be giving the same gift to my son.

I had a friend put it in good perspective.  When someone has twins, you never hear anyone talk about, oh one of them won't be loved as much or anything like that.  I think, good point!

 

That is a great point. I never thought of it that way.

DH and I have always said we wanted 2 or 3 kids. I am an only child and do not want DD to be an only. I know its the right decision - just weird thoughts, I guess.

cutelilme1210

Alexandra*sMom:

We always wanted more than one child.  I heard people say that they couldn't imagine loving a child more than #1 - but I never thought that.  I honestly knew I would love all my children.  

For me, the first 6 weeks of having 2 kids was tough on me.  #1 was and still is my most spirited child.  Everytime I nursed the baby, she'd get into things (put vicks, lotions, everything up and out of reach NOW!).  She is also a natural climber, so on top of the dresser didn't work, the top of the closet did. 

What else??  Going from 2 to 3 was a peice of cake.  I was out solo with all 3 kids in a week. 

 

I guess using the word "love" isn't correct. I know DH and I will love all our kids, no matter how many we have in the end. I guess I am just so use to it being a family of 3 that I am a little nervous about the change. In perspective, I have the same nervousness about becoming a family of 3 and we did fine with that. I am just glad that I am not the only one what these thoughts. Thanks ladies!

kcisthebombdotcom

I felt this way throughout my whole second pregnancy. That feeling changed instantly the day DD was born.

KimW

I wasn't nervous about not loving him the same.  As hard as it was to imagine loving anything else the same as I love DD, I figured everyone else that told me I would was right.

 What I was worried about was not being able to give all of myself to DD anymore, or to DS.  And I can't.  But the joy that they both get out of each other more then makes up for it.  DD doesn't get all of my attention anymore, and DS never has, but they get a sibling out of it, which is way better IMO!

ANJ410

You will love them equally, trust me.

EMWindy

ANJ410:

You will love them equally, trust me.

ITA - don't worry about that.   That's silly.   Having 2 is wonderful (busy but wonderful)

bwm2bmw

I'm not so much worried about having enough love for them both as I am about just juggling life in general with two. I have a hard time now working full time with one but just keep telling myself that other people do it everyday (and with more than two!). Good luck

emiliemadison

I think everyone feels nervous about adding a baby to the family, whether it's your first or fourth. And you wont love your 2nd (or 3rd, etc) child "the same way" you love your first LO- you love every child differently because they are different people. But, you will love each one just as much as the other. 

sydsmom04

ANJ410:

You will love them equally, trust me.

I agree with this. Right about a month before DD#2 was born, I started to panic about having enough time and energy to give them both my all. (They are 5 years apart) It came as natural as anything else and I wouldn't change it for the world!

Soap1

emiliemadison:

I think everyone feels nervous about adding a baby to the family, whether it's your first or fourth. And you wont love your 2nd (or 3rd, etc) child "the same way" you love your first LO- you love every child differently because they are different people. But, you will love each one just as much as the other. 

I totally agree with this.  I'm going to go ahead and come out with it - there are favorites.  Let's eliminate the taboo on it, because it happens.  You will love your second child as much as you love your first, but it will be in a different way!

I love both of my children so much and would do anything for either of them, but my experiences with them have been so different.  Let's face it, they are their own people with their own distinct personalities and it's likely (if not unavoidable) that you'll just "click" better with one of them.  It doesn't mean you love the other(s) any less.

Basically, you are going to have enough love for all of your children, and you'll love them equally but in different ways.  That's how I feel, and my girlfriends with more than one feel the same way!

 

k.linn

DD will be 27 months when this LO is born. Mostly, I'm excited for her to have a sibling. She loves kids, and since she doesn't go to daycare or anything, she gets especially excited to spend time with her cousins and other kids. Sometimes I do worry that she'll be frustrated about not getting my undivided attention anymore, and of course there's that fear of the unknown in trying to juggle two kids and their schedules at once, but I think that's only natural.

epopp85

I felt that way a little, and even now feeling DD kick away in there it's hard to imagine having more than DS sometimes, but I can definitely feel the attachment building the same way that it did when I was pg with DS.  It just takes a while to get used to the idea.  It didn't really seem 'real' until the a/s and we found out that she was a girl.  Now we are super thrilled to be having one of each sex and that DS will have a playmate and that DD will have an older brother to look up to. 

mari_gold

Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha:

I didn't really feel that way when we were TTC, but now that LO#2 is almost here, I am feeling quite a bit of anxiety regarding that very topic. Totally normal in my opinion.

This is how I felt toward the end. Now that she's here, I love her, but I feel guilty about how much less time I can give to DS. That will change as she gets older, of course, but it has been an adjustment.

workingmama

bwm2bmw:

I'm not so much worried about having enough love for them both as I am about just juggling life in general with two. I have a hard time now working full time with one but just keep telling myself that other people do it everyday (and with more than two!). Good luck

This.  Exactly.  Also, the whole going from three to four thing.  The move from two to three was a little tough, still is sometimes!  We miss our alone time.