Would you get married w/o your parents blessing?

Rebekah1021

My cousin has had this boyfriend for years. She's now 22 and getting ready to move away to some bible college in Minnesota. Boyfriend is ok, but nothing to be excited about. 

He asked my aunt/uncle for their blessing to propose around Valentine's Day and they said no. They want her to finish school and get established. They also mentioned it would give him time to get a decent job. My mom and I suspect they were hoping that she would meet someone else. This guy isn't very ambitious and doesn't take care of himself. My mom and I kind of think he did it to stake his claim on her so to speak.

Well, they got engaged on the 4th of July. It's an understatement that my aunt/uncle are not happy. I feel bad for my cousin, it's her life and she's old enough to make her own decisions. She's now torn about what to do and is sad that they don't have a blessing. 

So, would you get married w/o a blessing from your parents? 

 

belle204

I would let them know I respect their feelings and thoughts but, as an adult, I would hope they respect mine. Hard spot to be in. I know they don't want to see her hurt and want the best for her but she's 22 yrs old. I think I would go ahead and get married and if things didn't work out then that's a chance I took.

veloelle

I would, but sometimes those around you can see a situation much clearer than you can. And if you have more than one person who questions your relationship, probably warrants a closer look. I have a friend who has horrible, horrible taste in men going back to the 8th grade. I mean, she just picks guys that are an awful match for her. I wish she would have headed advice (that she solicited) before she got married the first time. I think she could have avoided that divorce.

ghm

First of all, maybe I'm way off base here, but every girl I know that's married someone from "bible college" has married a man that has no ambition.

That said, I think for a 22 year old it must be hard to get married without your parents accepting it. We were 19/20 when we got married and did not have the approval of his parents. They certainly made things dramatic and voiced their disapproval but we still got married.

Honestly, looking back, I can see why they were opposed--I'd say most young marriages don't work out or are unhappy. We've made it really hard for DH to finish his engineering degree, too, because kids add an extra time/financial stress. I think we're fortunate that in our 7 years of marriage we've grown together instead of grown apart. We've both changed, a LOT. But in ways that compliment each other. I don't think that's always the case.