Two Under 2

Need advice: My one year old and the newborn

Hello,

I'm seeking advice from those with children very close together.  When DS2 is born at the end of August, DS1 will just barely be 1 year old (his bday is Aug 1.)

When I bring home the new baby, I'm curious as to how DS1 might respond (if at all) and what I might need to think about/do special for him.  Since he's so young, he obviously won't understand what's going on but I want to make sure that his needs and feelings are taken care of.

Any experience or advice you can share?

Thank you in advance!

Jen

Re: Need advice: My one year old and the newborn

  • My DS was just under 10 months old when we had DD. He did not seem to notice much at all! We had lots of family around to distract them, but really, you just do your best to share your time!. He will be fine, and will only ever remember having a sibling! 
  • I have a similar spacing. My 2 are 12 months and 22 days apart.

    The transition was so easy for my oldest. The day before I brought his sister home and the day after were exactly the same. At that point in time, he had just mastered walking recently, so he was far more interested in walking around the house than sitting with me while I held the baby.

    My advice is to involve him in any way you can and babyproof extensively so your oldest can explore safely. We have an oversized recliner, so if DS wanted attention while I was feeding DD, he could come sit next to me. We'd snuggle and sing songs (learn to feed a bottle or nurse one handed quickly!), I'd read him a story, or I'd let me help burp the baby. When I was holding the baby while she was awake, I'd sit on the ground and play toys/read them both books at the same time.  I also tried to give him as much 1 on 1 attention when DD was sleeping (which was a lot when she was an infant, and she still naps a ton!)

    GL!

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  • My experience was that the olders didn't mind the youngers at all - they loved their siblings and didn't have any sort of jealousy at all.  That said, I'd make every effort to spend any time you DO have (which will be little - if you're EBF even less) with the older.  Let DH or helpers take baby as much as possible to allow you to spend time with them.  Also, when you're watching them alone, you'll need to find safe spots in the house to leave baby - I wasn't able to be outside of arm's reach or the older ones were on top of the baby, poking eyes, etc.  That was really the hardest part for me.

    Otherwise, don't worry, it'll all come together.

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