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greenbean79
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How long is your commute to and from work each day?
greenbean79
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in Working Moms
Once I go back to work, I will be commuting 2 hrs a day (1 hr there, 1 back). This will mean i will get home around 6pm each evening. I hope that's enough time to cook, clean up , put the baby to bed, etc without going insane.
I am already worrying about how I am going to juggle working f/t and also being a mom/wife.
How do you ladies do it? Did it take you a while to get used to?
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Re: How long is your commute to and from work each day?
13 minutes door-to-door...tack on an extra 10 minutes in the evening for p/u from daycare.
I work 7 to 4:30 and we're home by 5 pm. DS goes to bed at 7 pm, so we have two hours to eat, play, and get ready for bed. Then I do a chore or two and get some time w/DH.
I have no advice about the long commute and getting home later as I would never live anywhere I had that long of a commute...but you just make it work and it does take some time to get into a good rhythm. Hopefully, your LO goes down later than ours does. If DS isn't in bed around 7 pm, he turns intoa bear and is up at 5 am or earlier the next day...with a 7 pm bedtime, he'll usually sleep until 6 am.
***Lurking***
I have a 45 min commute one way, so I know what you mean. It's hard, but you'll get into a routine. I have two older ones that help with the chores so it makes it marginally easier. LOL. Honestly, you just do the best you can, and you should develop a routine ASAP to help. It will get easier.
I also have an hour commute each way, and I won't lie to you, it is hard. But it gets easier over time. It helps if you have a supportive DH and can divide tasks evenly. My DH works 10hrs a day and spends 4hrs commuting, so its mostly me on my own.
These are my tips. I try to cook all my meals for the week on Sunday b/c there's just not enough time to make dinner during the week, its much easier to just reheat stuff. I have 2 sets of bottles that way you can prep one set for the next day, run the dishwasher with today's bottles, empty it in the morning, and let them dry during the day so they're ready to prep again at night. I do all my cleaning on the weekend, the only thing I do during the week is the dinner dishes. I try to spend time playing with DD and do my chores after she goes to bed.
When she was younger I was able to get some stuff done and put her in the swing, bouncer, entertainer, or jumperoo. Now she is older and mobile so it is harder. But I let her play with a drawer full of kitchen utensils while I do some things. The best thing you can do is babyproof really well so that you can give them some freedom- and thus freedom for you too.
Mines about 35-40 minutes in the morning and about an hour in the afternoon, but the afternoon time includes picking DS up from daycare. I had to alter my schedule in order to avoid peek traffic times as my commute could definitely be closer to an hour (w/o daycare pick up) if I worked more traditional hours. Is that an option for you?
Honestly, getting home at 6pm is not that bad. I get home around 5:30ish. Save all the cleaning for after your LO goes to bed and make easy dinners that take less time to prep.
1:15-1:30 each way depending on traffic/trains and if I have p/u or d/o. Sometimes the stars align and it takes 55 minutes, but that's the absolute best possible scenario and happens 2x a year.
I normally do drop off lately, leave ~7:15-7:30, get to work about 9:00; work through lunch and leave about 5:15-5:30. I should work until 6 prob. but whatever, I'm salary, I get home ~6:30.
DH gets off work around 5 and is home by 5:30, he normally chills out for a few minutes, starts dinner or makes a quick grocery run and then picks up DD about 5:45/6 and comes home w/ her. Somedays, they play at daycare for awhile, some days they go to the playground near our house. We all meet up about 6:30 either at home or nearby and then DH makes dinner for us while I play w/ DD, relax a little. I am basically on DD duty for the night and DH comes in and out depending on what's going on w/ her.
It takes about 20 minutes to get to and from work. I would add on an extra 5 minutes in the evening. I work a little earlier than some 7:45-4:15pm so there is a lot less traffic.
As far as cooking, I make something quick or pick up food on the way home. H works nights, so it's just me and LO.
Without exaggeration I would never, ever commute one hour each way to and from work. I'd quit. 10 hours a week? No way. My actual drive time door to door is about 10 mintes; 15 with child pick up/drop off.
Ok. Your husband can also cook, clean, put the baby to bed, etc. Time to reassess how your household operates.
My kids went to bed between 6:30 and 7:00pm from the time they were approx 6 months old 'til nearly 2. Even now my 4 year old goes to bed at 7:30.
Your nights are bound to be rushed and short.
Anyway, you will make it work. People do.
Would you be OK w/ renting for the next 20 years and/or never saving more than 100/mo or taking a 50% pay cut. Or moving away from your family and friends to avoid a long commute. Its nice that this is an option for you, but w/ my job and the area w/ live in and hour commute is pretty normal.
Even when I was single and lived in the city, it still took me 20 minutes to get to work - and I was living in an small studio apartment and making a fairly decent salary.
I'm in the same situation...I have a good job and there just aren't enough companies/jobs in the area that we live, unless, like you say, we move away from friends/family or take a pay cut. Otherwise, I would love to cut down my commute time.
This is not helpful and just makes the rest of us feel bad. I have an hour commute in one direction and my husband has a 2hr commute in the opposite direction. Sure we could sell our house, get 2 separate apartments 10mins from work each, and live separate lives. Oh but then that would invalidate your 2nd point.
By the way the OP never said her husband didn't help. I know my DH does the best he can, but when he's gone 14hrs a day it falls mostly on me.
I agree. Actually my husband does help, however, there is still a lot to do when we both have a 1 hr commute opposite ways, as we do. Not everyone has the luxery of being able to find a decent job close to their home.
Oh goodness
Didn't we establish yesterday that this board should be to support each other? Get over yourself.
To the OP, my commute is the same as yours and my advice is the same as JF198400's. The duplicate set of bottles & pump parts helps tremendously and so does cooking meals ahead of time. DS and I walk in the door at 6:15 p.m & he's in the crib at 8:15 p.m. I give him 20 min of uninterrupted mommy time first b4 I let him loose in the kitchen while I prepare dinner, make next day's lunches, etc. When DH gets home at 7pm, he helps feed / bathe him (really hectic when he works late & I do it all!) then he packs the daycare bag & washes weekday dishes. If all goes smoothly, I'm sitting in bed with an hour of t.v., reading, & 1-on-1 time with DH before I go to bed at 10:30pm & start all over again at 5:30 a.m.
In all honesty, it took quite a while to get used to, and I still find myself always exhausted and always like I'm rushing, but hey, that's life. You'll adjust & learn to make it work, but def hand off some things to DH (I made the mistake of not doing that early on). Good luck & don't stress about it mama!
I have an hour and a half commute each way. In the morning I wake the DS up at 6AM to feed her and I leave the house sometime between 6:30AM and 7:00AM. I leave work between 4:30PM and 5:00PM each day and arrive home sometime between 6:00PM and 6:30PM. Once I get home I focus on spending time with my DS until 8:00PM when she is ready for bed.
My husband is staying home with her right now, so I do not have to do chores or cook when I get home. We mainly clean on the weekends. Once the DH goes back to work I am sure we will have to adjust to the new schedule, but I am hoping that the nanny that will be watching DS will contribute some to the housework.
When I first went back to work after having DD, my commute was 1 - 1 1/2 hours each way depending upon traffic. It must be nice to be in a position to say what you would never ever ever do, but where I live, long commutes are the norm, not the exception.
I had to stay organized and plan things well in order to make the best use of my time. DH dropped DD off and I picked her up so that I had more time with her in the evenings. I pre-made dinners, relied on convenience foods more than I may have wanted, and used the time after she went to bed to run errands and do chores. And yes, my husband helped. He also had an hour commute - the same commute he has now, four years later.
You'll find the balance and sort out a system that works best for you. It's hard, but you and your husband will figure it out, I promise. Good luck!
DH and I communte about 45 min each way and carpool, so we all get home around 6 pm. I agree with alot of PP, planning ahead is key. Do as much as you can the night before!
Remember that the beginning is going to be hard, so don't put too much pressure on yourself. If you LO goes to bed as soon as you get home, it's okay. If they don't get a bath that night, just go with it. My LO is 1 and I feel like we are just now getting to a point where we have a dedicated schedule.
My commute is 1 hour 20 min each way. It is tough, but I've found a few things that help.
I switched my hours so I work 7:30-3:30 so I get home earlier. This helps with having some time to play with DD.
For dinners, I usually make them the night ahead after DD's asleep and then just have to pop them in the oven the next evening (things like casseroles, meatloaf, stuffed shells, work well). Or I do prep stuff like chopping the night before. Now that it's warmer, we'll grill. DD hangs out with DH while he grills stuff and I make the sides (veg & potato or something like that) inside. I also make big batches so there are left overs, can be used for another dinner or lunches the next day. I don't want to waste time we could be spending with DD in the kitchen.
Get DH to help. This took time, but is great now. It was hard to basically tell him what to do until he got the hang of it down, but before that I was getting DD down for the night, getting up every few hours to BF, and trying to do everything around the house. I was really resentful of DH watching TV and sleeping uninterrupted. Now he knows the routine and helps out a lot.
If you can afford it, get a cleaning person or cleaning service. It's SO great to have a clean house and makes keeping up with cleaning easier (especially now that our house is on the market). I clean on weekends only and do laundry during the week.
on average my commute is a solid hour each way give or take 10-15 min for traffic, holidays etc.
DH does drop off every morning and I do pick up every evening. I'm at my desk around 0730 and leave at 4pm at DC by 5, home around 515/530 depending on how long I chat about his day.
It's the "Norm" for our area. anything less than a 45 min commute each way is considered a great commute, an hour is totally normal. I have a couple people in my office that commute 2hrs plus each way.
1:45, but the train is an hour of that so I get some good me time in. I don't get home until 7:30 and then it's baby, dinner, and bottles for the next day. She goes to bed at 9:15 right now.
I do no cleaning at all (maybe dishes in the dishwasher) during the week. It's not a lot of time but I try to make the most of it. If she ever starts going to bed at 7 I will be really sad.
I work from home on Fridays so we make up some of the time then since I can nurse and also spend lunch with her, plus commuting time becomes family time.
Me too. I drive an hour each way, but I make a crapload of money and have amazing benefits. I also have daycare right in the hospital where I work, so DD will make the commute with me each way.
We will be moving in a year to another part of the country and I'll have a shorter drive. But it is what it is right now.
Me too. I drive an hour each way, but I make a crapload of money and have amazing benefits. I also have daycare right in the hospital where I work, so DD will make the commute with me each way.
We will be moving in a year to another part of the country and I'll have a shorter drive. But it is what it is right now.