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Northern California Babies
How long would you leave your 18 month old for?
I don't mean to be a PW, I've been meaning to ask you all for a while.
DH and I are talking about taking a little vacation, just us two before LO #2 comes. Possibly in early Sept. DS is very comfortable with MIL & FIL (and I feel comfortable with him in their care), but has only slept over their house maybe 3 times. Everytime they say how great and easy he was. They've already offered to watch him if we decide to go somewhere. DH and I have not been able to talk about a lot of details, but I'd love to go to HI, so I'm thinking 5 days. Is 5 days long enough/worth it for the travel time? We could always do a beach house on the coast here, but I just want to be a beached whale for a few days and that can be almost impossible on the chilly NorCal coast. Is a 5 day trip reasonable for that age? Would you do shorter or longer? What do you think?
TIA!
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Re: How long would you leave your 18 month old for?
5 days would be too long for me, but that is because DS is so high needs even at this age I can't imagine a grandparent keeping up with him for that long. KWIM?
Otherwise I think 4-5 days is fine but I would want to stay longer if flying all the way to HI. What about some place like Pismo Beach? We love it there and there is lots of fun things to do plus the beach.
We are doing a trip that long in August w/o P, who will be just short of 18mo. We had actually originally planned to bring him with us (for a friend's wedding) but now that we know I'm pg I just don't think DH and I can handle the travel with him in tow. MIL and FIL will be watching him, plus a combo of other family that watch/see him regularly. We left him for a weekend for our anni in April (he was about 14mo) for two nights and when we came back we were all excited to see him and he was too busy playing with his toys he hardly even said hello. Sheesh!!!! So after that we feel more comfortable leaving him. That said, if my in laws weren't totally okay with it and encouraging us to leave him for the trip, and he didn't know them as well as he does I might not do it.
ETA: re:timing, I think 5 days is fine if you stay in one place and fly directly there (like 5 days in honolulu or something) otherwise if you want to be a beach whale then I would do santa barbara or san diego in sept.
"Oh come on Gromit, a bit more, you know... alluring!!"
We took a trip to Vegas when DS was 15 months? 14 months? Wow...where has my brain gone?
Anyhoo...we took a vegas trip and were gone 2 nights, we definitely could have managed 4 nights, we missed him but we knew it was good for us to do it. I think 5 would be OK, but I think after 4 for me personally...on the FIRST time away would be too much. Can you do a 1-2 night test run before? I think now that we have been away once 5 would be no problem (but of course would miss the ever-loving-poop out of him!).
ETA: I have thought about it some more...I dunno if 5 days would be "no problem" like I stated. After the 2 nights I was ready for 1 more night when I was still at the hotel but as soon as I packed the bag back up and I was heading to the airport...nothing was fast enough to get me to him. I leaned to my huz and said "I am glad we only did 2 days." So you know...I really don't know. I think it is something you have to analyze within yourself.
Money Matters The other half's blog.
EJ is growing up too fast!
I'd absolutely recommend San Diego in Sept. It will be gorgeous and the water will be warm(er).
I can't see doing 5 days but that's because I'm still BFing at night and in the AM and I don't know who I'd leave him with. I haven't spent a night away yet.
I think it's just different for everyone. I couldn't do it. I've only ever left her for a few hours. And if I leave, DH is watching her or she is sleeping for the night and my sister and BIL come over to "watch" her while we go out for a few hours.
There is no way I could go away for 5 days but that's me. I know others do it all the time! I'm just freak like that! I guess the nesties can add me to the list of crazy/wacky/dumb moms since I can't leave my kid for more than a few hours. LOL!
At that age, we left Katie for a little over 2 weeks with my mom. AT our house though. We were in Ireland and Scotland.
Kristin
Awh, I was slow to the game but now wish I had left Ty earlier. The first time I really left him was to give birth to Jake. If I could do it allllll over again...I would have started doing so MUCH EARLIER!!
No way to answer that...It is totally what works for you and your kiddos. I know out of the 6 of us (my bros and sis) that have had kids 3 would for sure have done it 2 would for sure not and 1 I dunno.
I just think it is such a personal thing. If you and the inlaws are cool with it...then I dont see a reason not to. I am leaving Jonathan for the first night since he has been born...But thats what works for me KWIM??
And if he is good being there it might be smart since number might not be so it could possibly be a long time before you can try again
br
Its definitely a personal choice. DH and I went to vegas for 4 days last month and DD was 20 months. It was difficult and we missed her like crazy but we (I) really needed the break. DD did great with my in laws (which are really close with her) and when we got home, she was so excited and ran to give us a hug. It was awesome.
I'm sure they will be fine but it is whatever you feel comfortable with.
ditto ditto ditto!!
although when i only had one, i just couldn't cut the cord!!! we never went away, never got a sitter, no one ever put my kid down, etc. Now I'm like hey you off the street, you want to watch my kids?? Great!!!
I know! I just wouldn't be able to bring myself to do it. I would be miserable.
I'm obsessed with my daughter...it's a little ridiculous...LOL! It's the truth!
Thank you all for your input. I'm honestly a little wishy washy with the idea, somedays I'm like "heck yes! I'll pack now", and others "no way, he'll forget who I am
(". He would actually be closer to 20 months of we went in Sept, and I know that it will be years before we'd ever be able to do something like this again. I also know that I would be crying pulling out of IL's driveway (like I have done just when we've had a date night), but DH and I could use some time to reconnect and downtime before this one comes. It's a touchy subject for sure...
Oh, and Heather, GO! Drop Lily off around dinner time, get a room in the city, get breakfast the next morning and then go pick her up. You will sob like a baby, but you will be so grateful for that time alone. Seriously, do it.
I didn't reply earlier because I felt like a wet blanket. I am not the mom who wanted to ever leave DS so I could reconnect with anyone, much less my husband. And he had no interest in it either so I have no guilt or qualms about it. We rarely go out (we were homebodies before DS) and that's just fine by us. His first night apart was just before his second birthday last year and since then we've done it with varying success about 6 more times. Never longer than one night.
I wouldn't do five nights in Hawaii if I were you, and I wouldn't do HI for fewer nights. Like others, I would find a way to escape to a warm southern CA beach and skip teh 5 hour flight. Maybe San Diego?