How are you (or are you?) talking to your toddler about allergies..?

MrsBeckO

At what age should we start teaching DD about safe and unsafe foods. She has a peanut/tree nut allergy. I know I (and DH) will be her sole advocate(s) for a long time, but I'd like to start teaching her about her allergy as soon as possible. For now she will say "No NUTS!" but she just thinks its a game right now. My niece (who spends a lot of time with DD) is just about 3 1/2 and just recently seems to be remembering that "peanuts can make Cam-A-Lam veeeeery sick". So I guess I still have a while before DD really comprehends anything, huh? 

Just wondering how other PA moms are approaching this whole thing.. teaching kiddos about their allergies? 

g_belle

We talk about it all the time now.  If we're having food that he can't have (or if DH puts real butter on his food) and J says he wants "daddy's green beans" we tell him- "no- daddy's green beans have butter and that will make J sick".  And he repeats "make J sick".  We also are working on "we don't share food.  that's how people get sick" when he tries to give us things off of his plate.  At a family picnic when he reached for a pancake- we told him "no J- those pancakes have eggs and milk and will make J sick.  Mommy made you special pancakes and they are in the cooler- let's go get those."  He's usually ok with it. 

When we're in the grocery store I'll narrate things as they happen/come up.  Like our produce section starts with the bananas.  So I'll say "we're going to pass up the bananas and go find J some grapes because the bananas will make J sick". 

I know he won't really "get it" for a while still- but I'm sure he understands more than I think he does and it certainly doesn't hurt to start the dialogue sooner rather than later. 

luvmagoldn

My toddler is allergic to milk, egg, peanuts, tree nuts and sesame.  We have many opportunities (sadly) to tell him that something is not safe for him.  When he was around 18 months old he would hold out is hand and say, "make baby sick" when he saw food.  Then he started saying it in a questioning way, "make baby sick?"  That's when I changed my phrasing to something more positive.  If I had to tell him something was not safe for him to eat I would immediately counter with something that IS safe for him.  Now he will ask, "safe for me?" before he touches food.  When I say yes he gets a BIG smile on his face. 

We've had a lot of opportunities for this as his older brothers do not have the number of allergies he does (DS#2 is allergic to tree nuts and kiwi) so we have unsafe foods in our house.  

 We have had to use the epi once so he definitely knows what that's about.  About a week ago I left the twins with DH and took DS#3 with me to the grocery store. I got a block or two away and realized I left his epi-pen on the table at home.  I called DH and told him I was swinging around to get it.  Fast forward to today - I took all the boys to the library.  We got a few blocks from home and DS#3 asked me, "Mama, have epi pen?"  He was totally paying attention to the event a week or so before and remembered it.  I am glad he got the message that we absolutely have to have it wherever we go.   When I told him yes, we do have the epi he simply said OK! in his upbeat little way and started chattering on about something else.

There is a cute book called The BugaBees that explains food allergies to kids in a way they can understand.  All three of my kids like that book and the older kids like going through the is this safe for so-and-so exercises in the back.

https://thebugabees.com/

Making kids appropriately aware of their allergies is difficult to be sure.  I want my boys to be aware and learn how to manage their own allergies (at some point in the future) without being overly afraid either.  It's hard to find a balance.  For right now, i think we are doing ok but we'll see what the future holds.

Court0026

We read the Bugabees book and he knows what he is and is not allergic too.  He likes to go through it and the little "quiz" at the end.  That said, it all means nothing when he is out somewhere.  We are working hard on good eating and drinking habits.  No sharing food, ask us if he can have something first, educating everyone we know, etc. 

MrsBeckO

Thanks ladies! I like the point about teaching them not to share food.. though that will be really tough with her in preschool and having tons of cousins close to her age, none of which have food allergies and have been taught *to* share. 

I'll look into that Bugabees book, too!

Thanks!

Oh, and I thought I remembered seeing some allergy flash cards on some website but now I can't seem to find them.. does anyone know what I'm talking about or of something similar? 

carlinlp

Here is a list of other books.

We also have a photo of each allergic food on our fridge (and she had one on her desk at school, etc.)  I wanted to make it visual for her especially because she has allergies to nuts, eggs, and other items that are often used as ingredients and are hidden.  It's just not that easy to say don't eat a nut/egg.  So for eggs I have a photo of an egg, a scrambled egg and a cake, etc.  We've tried to teach her to say "is this food safe for me?" but the real key has been "don't share food with anyone, ever".  I just don't trust other people to feed her.  Her allerbling bracelet has stopped other adults from feeding her several times, totally worth the cost.

MrsBeckO

carlinlp:

just don't trust other people to feed her.  Her allerbling bracelet has stopped other adults from feeding her several times, totally worth the cost. 

Yeah, I learned all about not trusting others to safely feed her this weekend. I'm amazed we didn't have a reaction incident while we were at the lake for the day with DH's family.. it was a nightmare for me keeping her away from unsafe foods. Definitely convinced me to order a bracelet... some people just need a constant, visual reminder to think about what they're doing! 

carlinlp

The smaller allerbling fits teagan so it might be a little big on cam but not for long.

magdusia

My son is only 20 months old so i know it's early but we pretty much just read books about it right now.  I have 2 cute books about allergies.. i know he doesn't get it yet though. 

I make sure when i read the ingredients i include him in it.. Mainly when we shop i point to the ingredients and i say "no milk, no soy, no nuts, no eggs... eeewwww" and sometimes in the house -even though i know it's safe, i still go to the ingredients and i point to it and say "look A, it's Safe!" and have this super excited face. He gets excited too.  So i guess i am trying to teach him to see certain words and associate my expressions to them.

I'm pretty sure the older they get the more they will understand and the more they will ask.. They will read our body language when we are around food. 

He also wears an allergy bracelet and i talk about it to him..

 

macchiatto

I really am just starting to now. I mean, there were times when Will would ask for something and I'd say, "I'm sorry, honey; that would make you sick" but I didn't full-on explain the whole allergy concept to him yet. (He outgrew most of his allergies just recently so now it's just corn for him and eggs for Alex.) I think at this point, 2.5, they're old enough now to understand it better. They're also not in a lot of settings with food where I'm not there; the church nursery workers and all baby-sitters know about their allergies and at the Y daycare, we write their allergies on the sign-in sheet but no snacks are allowed so hopefully it will never be an issue there. I was nervous about family reunions this summer with the peanut allergy but very thankful that's no longer an issue.