Before 8 a.m. this morning...

bb_n_jp · June 2011

Before 8 a.m. this morning, the following things happened:

1) DS1 set off the house alarm, while I was in the shower with soap in my hair. I had to get out, turn it off, and Google our alarm company to call them off since they still call "D"H and I knew he wouldn't answer the phone. Finally got them, they called off the police. Back in the shower until...

2) My phone rings again. It's only 6:30a, so I jump out with conditioner in my hair to answer it. Because of the alarm noise, our dog has jumped the fence and is two blocks away. Long blocks. Up hill. I throw on my hideous purple robe, and run barefoot to rescue the dog.

3) I arrive back at my house to find that DS1 has shut and locked the front door. He is now playing happily with his Buzz Lightyear. It takes him a good 5 minutes to finally come let me back in.

4) Back in the shower. Rinse. Phone rings again. REALLY? It's my mother. My cousin tried to kill herself last night by drinking a bottle of rubbing alcohol. She's probably going to be ok, but wow.

5) I hang up the phone with Mom after about five minutes and realize it's WAAAAYY too quiet. I go into DS2's room, where he and DS1 look really, really guilty. They've eaten an entire bottle of Hyland's teething tablets that DS1 retrieved via step stool from the very top of his dresser (no idea why I still had them). Hello, Poison Control? Luckily both PC and the manufacturer said they'd have to eat six bottles each to hurt themselves but still HOLY HELL.

6) I've had it. Everyone dressed, air-drying my hair, slam down some waffles with peanut butter for breakfast, they actually eat which is a miracle, out the door to the car and.... the sprinklers are on, which is way too much for a 2-year-old to resist. Back inside, new outfit for DS2, back to the car, STRAP THEM IN and off we went.

I can laugh now, but only sort-of, because it's now almost 10:30a and "D"H still hasn't answered any text messages which means the f*cker is still asleep.

ladipale · June 2011

O M G! What a rough morning. you are a champ for handling it all.

hope the rest of your day sails by.

kfishie · June 2011

WOW! What a morning. Huge hugs to you! Glad your kids are okay and wishing the best for your cousin. And, hopefully, you get a little down time for yourself so you can just relax and enjoy something nice Drinks

. You deserve it!

2bearichards · June 2011

Holy sh*t Blair! Hope the rest of your day goes a bit smoother. Hugs friend!

Mrs.K&C · June 2011

Oh, Blair. I'm glad you can laugh about it now because I'd still be fuming at this point!!! I hope your day gets a million times better.

You are one strong woman, lady.

StefandTodd · June 2011

OMG. Wow. I hope your day improves IMMENSELY. I'm so sorry for such a wild and crazy morning. I agree with PP's that you are one strong woman!

futrkingsley · June 2011

If I were you, I would have called in "crazy" and stayed home after a morning like that! I'm sorry! What a mess. I'm glad everyone involved is going to be okay.

My smoke detector went off this morning while I was in the shower too! THankfully no one else was home and it stopped without me having to do anything. But it made me wonder about the heat/etc.

Hope your day gets better FAST!

Mrs_Shmoopie · June 2011

2bearichards:
Holy sh*t Blair! Hope the rest of your day goes a bit smoother. Hugs friend!

Pretty much exactly this. What a way to start the day!

Mrs_Shmoopie · June 2011

Oh, and ditto to whoever said that you should print this out. But don't stash it in their baby book. Put it somewhere for safekeeping. Then when they're 16 and want to borrow the car you can pull it out and say, "Remember that time I had to run out naked w/soap in my hair b/c you set off the alarm? Yeah, I'm still pissed. No car for you." And when they're 17 and need extra money to go skiing w/a friend, "Please refer to Item 2. Dog ran off b/c of you, whole neighborhood saw me in my purple robe. You owe ME money for the extra counseling I had to go through after that." Etc. Apply liberally.

And more {{{{HUGS}}}}}

SweetieP · June 2011

You are amazing. I would have lost it in more ways than one!

StefandTodd · June 2011

futrkingsley:

If I were you, I would have called in "crazy" and stayed home after a morning like that! I'm sorry! What a mess. I'm glad everyone involved is going to be okay.

I almost said this exact same thing. I would have given up completely on a day with that many obstacles. In fact, I'm pretty sure I would've made the decision to do so after just the first few incidences...the rest would've just been further justification and reassurance I was doing the right thing.

Again, hope your day improves!!

quesarah · June 2011

Ugh, sounds like a crazy morning! ((hugs))

everydayeve · June 2011

That is one hell of a morning! I know everyone says you should've called in to work after that, but I would've gone in just to escape the craziness happening all around me at home. I hope your day gets better. Really, I think that should be enough crazy to last you for a very long time. Your quota is filled!

MsPurple24 · June 2011

You are a freaking rock star. Holy crap.

MommySteph2009 · June 2011

Wow, what a morning. I'm sorry that you had to deal with so much so early in the day. I hope the rest of your day is smoother.

dirtbikemom · June 2011

Many hugs!! That is a crazy morning. I hope your day is improving and you get a nice glass of wine tonight!

mythreesons03 · June 2011

That sounds like a HORRIBLE morning. I hope the day turns around for you!

marsnemmo · June 2011

OMG Blair big big hugs!!!!!

dblhappiness · June 2011

OMG!! I hope your day goes MUCH smoother--with extra long naps from the boys for you!!

m&m818 · June 2011

Mrs.K&C:

Oh, Blair. I'm glad you can laugh about it now because I'd still be fuming at this point!!! I hope your day gets a million times better.

You are one strong woman, lady.

Ditto!