WWYD (long)

aprilsarahjune

DH and I are in a wedding at the end of July.  It is a 6 hour drive and then involves a ferry ride.  DH and I don't really have vacation time to use (lay off for him earlier in the year and bed rest for me), so we will arrive as close to the rehearsal dinner time on Friday night as possible and leave on the first ferry on Sunday morning.  Because of the speed-demon style travel and the fact that we are in the wedding, I don't think we can bring the girls with us.  (Also with the car seats in the back of the truck, there is not really room to take another adult with us.)

So here are my ideas.

(1)  Have my parents spend the weekend at my house.  (If I take the girls to their house, I will have to drive south 1 1/2 hours and then my trip north will be 7 1/2 hours and like I said, we don't have much vacation time to spare.)  They really want to watch the girls.  They are great people and great with the babies, but as with most grandparents, they don't necessarily listen to the way I say things need to be done.  Also, they would have to get up several times during the night and I am not sure they are up for the task.   I think I will come home to two very grumpy babies and to someone else's reorganization of my house.  And then we will have to start our workweek in chaos in addition to exhaustion.

(2)  Have the nanny spend the weekend with them.  But I have never spent the night alone with both babies, so can I really expect someone else to do it alone for 48+ hours?  The up side is that this girl does things exactly the way I want them done.  If she can hold onto her sanity over the course of the weekend, I will come home to happy babies and a house and life just the way I left it. 

(3)  Have the nanny spend Friday night, my parents spend the day on Saturday, the nanny spend Saturday night, and my inlaws drive up Sunday.  I think this might strip the girls of any sense of routine and security though, so probably not a good idea.

Thoughts?

OrangeSmoke

I actually think #3 is a great idea.  Having grandparents come over for a good part of the day will probably give her some much needed relief.  Just make it clear to all parties that the nanny is "IN CHARGE". 

 

monkski

yeah, I think I would do #3 as well. If their routine is off, they will adjust again. It might take a couple days, but all will not be lost.

klr210

I am a dissenter. If you trust your parents to care for them well and they are up for it and WANT to do it, I say, let them have a chance to bond with the babies. Sure they'll leave tired, and the babies may be a little out of sorts, but my bias says it's worth it. (I didn't have involved grandparents myself, and although I go crazy with "grandma rules vs. mom's rules" I am so grateul for their bond, it's precious and priceless).  

ETA - Have you mentioned to them how often the babies wake during the night? If they are concerned then maybe offer to have the nanny stay overnight too. I think the commute back and forth for the day shifts may be just as draining as overnight baby duty.

 

 

erinruns

The first time I left my girls their nanny spent Friday night with them and my parents came up on Saturday and stayed until Sunday.  Each party only had one night to deal with, so they weren't quite as exhausted and it worked out really well.

If you had your nanny spend the weekend with them would your parents be hurt?   

aprilsarahjune

Thanks for the advice, ladies!  Sorry I waited so long to check back.  Not sure what I am going to do yet, but I certainly should give my parents the opportunity.  Perhaps I will have the nanny stay on Friday and my parents stay the following night, as previous post suggests.