A question for the ex-believers in God

Mama_SAS

I guess your question isn?t for me because I?m not an ex-believer, but I want to answer because not every atheist comes from a bad experience with religion.

I was born atheist and raised atheist, and so were my parents. I had no idea that people believed in any gods until 4th grade, I think. I still didn?t understand to what extent they believed. I thought it was like ghosts, just something that we couldn?t see that some people believe in. I was much, much older when I realized that people believed that this whole thing was a Really Big Deal, so to speak. I was pretty shocked to the extent of stock people put into these beliefs.

My grandfather was raised Catholic. He is a genius, literally, and he is extremely logical and scientific. Catholicism was not logical to him and had many scientific inconsistencies. By the time he was 20 he had completely rejected it. My grandmother wanted to still believe, but in talking to my grandfather she realized that, to her, what he said made more sense than what the Catholics were saying. (This is where faith comes in for many of you, I?m sure. They didn?t have any.) When my grandfather told his sister that he was now an atheist she whispered ?Don?t worry, I?ll still tell people that you?re Catholic so Mom and Dad don?t find out.? This was in the 1930s, I believe.

I do not know how far back the atheism goes in my mother?s family. 

Libby1978

Mama_SAS:

I guess your question isn?t for me because I?m not an ex-believer, but I want to answer because not every atheist comes from a bad experience with religion.

I was born atheist and raised atheist, and so were my parents. I had no idea that people believed in any gods until 4th grade, I think. I still didn?t understand to what extent they believed. I thought it was like ghosts, just something that we couldn?t see that some people believe in. I was much, much older when I realized that people believed that this whole thing was a Really Big Deal, so to speak. I was pretty shocked to the extent of stock people put into these beliefs.

My grandfather was raised Catholic. He is a genius, literally, and he is extremely logical and scientific. Catholicism was not logical to him and had many scientific inconsistencies. By the time he was 20 he had completely rejected it. My grandmother wanted to still believe, but in talking to my grandfather she realized that, to her, what he said made more sense than what the Catholics were saying. (This is where faith comes in for many of you, I?m sure. They didn?t have any.) When my grandfather told his sister that he was now an atheist she whispered ?Don?t worry, I?ll still tell people that you?re Catholic so Mom and Dad don?t find out.? This was in the 1930s, I believe.

I do not know how far back the atheism goes in my mother?s family. 

I'm so glad you shared a different point of view.  This will be how Oliver grows up more or less.  The other two have been exposed to religion/church, but they know how DH & I believe or don't believe now. 

Mama_SAS

rochella:

I've had a lot of problems with God, especially in my pitfalls of depression, and I've read almost every atheistic author (Dawkins, Hitchens, Russell, etc) to become an atheist or at least an agnostic, and I just can't stop believing.  Every time I try, God proves himself to me again and again.  Every aspect of my life is consumed by proof of His existence and His love.  Additionally, as a Pentecostal, I've seen absolutely unbelievable things and I've seen people change completely.  I don't even like to talk about it because I KNOW how skeptical and cynical our world is and I know they'd just roll their eyes and say it wasn't true. 

Even though I don't find faith "comforting" and I don't get to have all the signs that my other Pentecostals have and I feel like a very "blue" Christian, I believe in God like I believe in the color blue.  It's not this grandiose struggle with faith.  I couldn't stop believing if I tried - and I have.  It's a lot easier to tell people why you DON'T believe in God than the reverse.

ETA I also believe people seriously anthromorphize God, like insanely much so.  The only "human" aspect of God is Jesus Christ, IMO.  That's why the predestination vs. free will debate or the God-can't-be-omniscient/omnipotent/omnibenevolent/omnipresent "logic" model drives me up the wall.

Something about religion we can agree on!!

You do not choose your beliefs; you believe them. Try as hard as you want and you, Rochella cannot make yourself stop believing in God anymore than I can make myself believe that any gods exist. I?m sure it is much easier for me to explain why religion is unscientific and illogical than it is for you to explain how you feel God or how you have seen God?s work. 

(This paragraph is not directed at you, Rochella, it?s about all the religion talk in the last month - some go great and some go off the rails.) I think these open discussions are great when we talk about how we personally feel instead of arguing about how the others are wrong. However, as soon as one person steps from an ?I? statement to a ?you? statement the defenses go up and everyone is on the attack.  I truly think it a good thing if we learn where the people around us are coming from, whether we agree with them or not, but when they turn to arguments we get nowhere.

LW2410

Libby1978:

LW2410:

I don't think that I ever really believed. I was raised in the Methodist church, at my mother's insistence. My parents made me go to church every Sunday and I had to get confirmed. I have nothing but nice things to say about most of the people in those congregations. The pastor of the church that I attended was an exceptional man! He wasn't pushy at all, very respectful, and he knew that I rejected Christianity. He was a genuinely good person. He told me that he was only in the Methodist church because, to him, it was the most lenient denomination. He professed that to him, Christianity is about a relationship between you and God, no church required. I found that idea very respectable.

That being said, after a lengthy analysis of Christianity (and other religions later on, as I am fascinated by them all), none of it made any logical sense. I understand the whole idea of "faith", but I just don't buy it. Why should I believe in something that lacks any sort of proof? I think that the mind can play a powerful trick on people. If you want to believe so wholeheartedly in something, it will become true in your mind, even if there is no proof. I believe that people who are of religion are under this power.

If it helps someone to become a "better" person, then I'm all for it. For my mother, it's about a sense of community. If someone feels like they need religion to tell them how to behave, or have morals, and they are guided by these morals, then that isn't a bad thing. I have ethics. I'm good for the sake of being good.

The conflict arises when people of religion feel the need to push their views on me. I used to engage in arguments/debates with people of religion but those days are over. It's like talking to a brick wall, for both sides. I will never convince a religious person to be atheist and they will never convince me to believe in religion. I'm firm and happy in my non-belief. I can comfortably say that I don't know what will happen when I die, but I'm pretty certain that it will just be a dreamless sleep. I've always loved to sleep. I know that this life is the only one I have so I'm going to make the most of it by keeping an open mind, learning as much as I can, being kind, and loving those that touch my life.

I love everything you wrote!  Very well said!

Thanks!