Easy success stories

greengirl0909

Hello ladies!! I try really hard to be sensitive to everyone's situation on these boards, so please know I'm visiting today with the best of intentions, and trying hard not to upset anyone.

I will be 35 next month. I've always hoped for many kids, we're hoping for 3.  Our first LO is 14 months old and last month I miscarried.  Everyone has been really encouraging, "well at least you have one"  "well, you know you can get pregnant" but as we prepare to start TTC again, I am struggling. As I read about the increased risk of miscarrying and all of the increased risks, I'm freaked out.  I'm going to be 35, I'm overweight.  I'm having trouble sleeping at night and although we were working on weaning, I'm really emotional about that, thinking what if I never have another baby?!

I'm not sure where I fit in around here, and again, with no disrespect, some of the TTC boards can be discouraging with all of the struggles some ladies are facing.  So I was just wondering: are there any ladies out there who conceived at 35+ without assistance? I guess until I have a reason to worry, I'm just looking for some hope! TIA

BrideBuddies

First off.. I am SO sorry for your loss. Most of us on here have been in your shoes at one time or another.  It just goes with the territory and there's no rhyme or reason for it sometimes.   Give yourself plenty of time to recover, both physically and mentally, before you start thinking about another try. 35 is just a number.. not an expiration date. 

I will say, the fact that you did have one successful pregnancy and it was recent---that does tip the odds in your favor for another child.   That was what my doctor told me, anyway.  That has a lot more to do with it than merely your age.   I was 41 when I had my son and I'm definitely not a supermodel.. .not by a longshot.   We haven't ruled out having another and I'm pushing 43 now.

We had an early miscarriage/blighted ovum when I was 39.  Very discouraging.  I did get pregnant again with no special efforts.  I was super nervous about it.   We were extremely high risk for Downs, too, but all the tests did not indicate any problems.  We opted not to have amnio or CVS testing.  Our kid is perfectly healthy, for which I am eternally grateful.

I am a firm believer in the power of positive thinking, so I'm convinced that having the proper frame of mind does a lot of good.  Oh, and a heck of a lot of prayer and "giving it up to a higher power/God/karma"... whatever you believe in.   Preachy, I know.   We had just started to think about adoption, and BAM!

Peppernut

I am so sorry for your loss!  Miscarriages are so traumatic, and emotionally exhausting.  

I am 43, pregnant with our second, and we may not be done.  I have had six miscarriages, two were ectopic, but they were almost all before I was 35.  We got pregnant with Margaux within a month of deciding to try, and this second one as well.  No charting, no fertility aids of any kind.  Margaux has a VSD, but is otherwise healthy and thriving.  This new baby has no genetic issues and her anatomy scan was clean.  These pregnancies have been easy on me, as well, no big health issues.  I'm reasonably active, in the overweight range but not obese, and I eat well.

Don't let the naysayers get you down!  Miscarriages are awful, but you can recover!  It'll all be okay! 

 

Strunella

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I know from personal experience that it is a painful road to travel.  I got pregnant the first month of trying and after my loss, we TTC for about 3 months on our own.  I felt the need to try to expedite the process because 40 was lurking around the corner, so we saw an RE.  Months of basic intervention were unsuccessful, and just as I was about to sign the dotted line to begin an IVF cycle, I discovered I was pregnant.  DH and I still wonder if I would have gotten pregnant earlier had we not been so anxious to intervene. 

I had a great pregnancy for an old chick and we just started TTC #2.  FWIW, my doctors didn't treat me any differently because of my age.  Other than being offered diagnostic testing early on (which we opted to do), my pregnancy was no different than that of my friends in their early 30s.

greengirl0909

Ladies, thanks so much, this helps and your words are so encouraging!

Pesky

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I m/c'ed (chemical pg) between DD and DS.  DD was born when I was 35, DS when I was 37.  And I'm on the younger side on this board.  Don't think your fertility falls off a cliff when you are 35.  Just take it a cycle at a time.  GL!

KerryHS

I am so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. But yes, have hope and lots of faith that you can get pregnant especially since you did it once before.  I am 42 and had my third baby in January.  Since I had already been blessed with two, I had put all sorts of limitations on myself - only trying for 6 months, wouldn't do IVF, all kinds of things that is hindsight seem completely stupid.  I was blessed with natural conception, but now that he is here the idea that I put all of these false limitations in place seems beyond dumb.  All anyone talks about is how hard it is to get pregnant so I think it looms above all of us women.  I think that it is great that you reached out to ask for reassurance.  Please let yourself relax - I swear it makes all of the difference.  Wish you all of the best.

stever

I am very sorry for your loss. I also agree that some of the other boards can get a bit scary so feel free to post on our board all you like

As for TTC, I conceived DS our first month trying literally on my 35th birthday. Had a very easy pregnancy and birth.

Good luck!

rsrn02

I'm very sorry for your loss. Take time to heal physically and emotionally. 35 is just a number. That said I had a hard time ttc. It took us 2 years and intervention. I am obese and have health problems. I understand the risks. I am trying to get healthy before having another

MyPunkinPie

I'm so sorry for your loss and hope you will find comfort and encouragement from the responses you receive here.

I conceived for the first time at 41 without assistance and within the first 2 months of trying. We were so blessed to carry a healthy baby to just shy of 36 weeks without any complications. At a "mere" 35, you are still a very healthy age to conceive and carry a baby!

Although there are some scary issues to deal with when you are AMA, just think - you'll get to see your baby a lot more since us AMAers usually get more ultrasounds!

ateytelb

Sorry for your loss. Looks I always conceive on the 1st try, doesn't matter if I am 19 or 40. I did have one m/c though before I got preg. with my baby.

fiazo

So sorry about your miscarraige.  It took us years to to get pregnant. We finally conceived through IVF at age 38, had DD at 39. Have been hoping to get pregnant naturally this time around. My DD is 22 months old. This past Jan we started seeing an RE again. After reviewing my history & doing numerous tests (one being HSG) she pretty much told me it is improbable for me to get pregnant on my own. She suggested using donor eggs. Me & DH decided to go this route & we were just playing the waiting game...waiting for the right donor to come along. The very next month I got pregnant on my own!!! I am now 11 weeks at 42 years old. I still wouldn't mind having 3, but am totally content with 2.

It's understandable to be depressed right now having just miscarried & have those thoughts in your head, but don't give up hope. Reading all that statistical stuff can make a person go crazy. There are risks for everything. Look at the risks on any medication bottle. It doesn't mean it's going to happen to you, it's just got to be reported.

In the meantime this board, although slow sometimes, is very encouraging & supportive of each other unlike some of the other boards. In fact there are a bunch of girls on Weight Watchers here. If you are overweight & want to do something about it, they would be a great support group. Reach out. We are here for you.

aglenn

I was 35 when DD was born, and she was a "surprise" baby so I didn't try at all... we have been trying for #2 for 2 cycles now, but our timing was way off the first month.  This morning I just got the faintest of faint lines (see siggy).  So, I'm being super cautious since it's still so early, but if it makes you feel any better your age is not necessarily the end of the story.  My OB told me when I was pregnant the first time that she wasn't at all worried about my age, and that there are so many other health factors that are so much more important than age to a successful pregnancy outcome.  Good luck to you!

AngelaU1971

I'm so sorry for your loss.

And yes, I conceived and had 2 healthy babies after 35 with no assistance.  We TTC for 2 months and got pregnant with Charlotte when I was 36.  Ruby was a surprise at 38!  So yes, it's possible!  Good luck!!

YaraC

I'm sorry for your loss. Miscarriages are awful. 

There are lots of ladies on this board and the pg35 board that conceived with no assistance. I am one of them. I conceived my daughter at 36, got pg again at 37 but had an m/c and now am pg again at 38.

Many women conceive easily over 35 just as many women under 35 need help.

 

Good luck. 

FLchicken

Very sorry for your loss.   Hoping some baby dust lands your way soon and you have a healthy baby.

I conceived the first month of trying at age 35.  After doing research, I started the first month with the CBEFM, OPK sticks, pre-seed lube, and charting.  I was prepared for a long road ahead, assuming and preparing myself for perhaps a more diff TTC journey due to age.  I was fortunate to get preg right away and have an easy pregnancy.  You never know!