Introducing myself :)

mizzmeg

Hello Ladies!

 I am currently only one week PP and had a horrible unplanned c/s experience. I posted on the May '11 board a lot. I can't help but feeling bad and jealous of the natural birth moms now. Iris mentioned this board to me and from what I have read, I feel like I belong. 

I would like to try a VBAC for my next pregnancy. DH is afraid of rupture, but if I am a good candidate I will try. 

I am hoping for support on here that the real world doesn't understand. Thanks!  

je2161

Hello, I am also from the May '11 boards. I gave birth 3 weeks ago, and had an unplanned c/s. I have been feeling very disappointed/regretful that I didn't deliver vaginally. I am convinced that a trial of labor will be in my future for the next baby, because I have been doing a ridiculous amount of research, and a VBAC has a very reasonable risk profile for a woman with one low transverse incision.

My emotional response to the unplanned c/s has been to become obsessed with VBAC! I posted a few days ago under the title "Obsessed with VBAC...anyone else", and it describes the details of my birth story.

What you are feeling is very normal, and I have felt the same things. It's tough when you envision the birth one way and then it turns out differently. Just know that these feelings do get better over time! 

cchill01

Welcome.  You've come to the right place.  What you are experiencing is very normal.  Most of us have been through the range of emotions...anger, sadness, jealousy, loss, disappointment.  Give yourself time to heal physically and mentally.  Once you're feeling physically better, you will start to feel mentally better.  I was really mad at myself for not "trying harder."  Slowly, I've been able to forgive myself and start to heal.  Though, after 17 months, I still have a long way to go.

Cut DH some slack too.  He just went through what may have been a MORE traumatic experience than you did.  My DH was a total wreck during labor and my c-section.  When my heart rate dropped and they called for support, my Mom said that DH really fell apart.  I on the other hand was half drugged and didn't realize what was going on.  I remember thinking - "ooh an oxygen mask, I like oxygen." LOL. 

Try not to think or talk too much about a VBAC right now.  You'll have plenty of time to bring DH around.  Enjoy this time with your little one!  And Congratulations!

iris427

Welcome!

My husband had a hard time understanding how emotionally difficult my cesarean was and why I wanted a VBAC so much.  We had some hard days and some arguments because of that.  But eventually I was able to help him understand what it meant for me and he ended up being my biggest VBAC supporter and my rock during my second pregnancy and birth.  Give your husband some time and I'm sure he will come around.  And give yourself time to heal physically and emotionally. 

whyhellopoppyseed

Girl I completely understand, I had the SAME terrible unplanned experience last summer and am PG again. All I can say is to remember that you are NOT broken! You can most likely have a VBAC next time! Be encouraged. Education is your ally! I'm hoping for a VBAC in January. GL!!