names

35baby

I know this isn't an after 35 question, but I am wondering about this.  Should I let my boyfriend pick the name of my first child? I want to have input into her name, but I want him have the final say.  The main reason being that he already has children and isn't that keen on another one.  I figure if he get invovled in things like her name, he will feel more of a connection with her.  I cannot wait until he sees her to realize what a beautiful gift he has been given yet again.  Am I wrong in my decision? Welcome any feedback.

Pesky

No offense, but I don't think giving him naming rights over your kid is going to increase his sense of responsibility (or lack thereof) one bit.  Obviously, try not to choose a name he hates, like may that of his ex-wife, but beyond that, I wouldn't be giving him sole veto.  Odds are good if things go south (God forbid) YOU are the one raising your DD and best to have a name that you think suits her and you can live with if your feelings towards her father change.

35baby

Not offended at all.  Was looking for opinions either way.  I feel he will come around in the end but you never know.  He only got to name two kids one of who died, so I want him to feel more connected with this pregnancy.  Dispite what may happen with us (g-d forbid) She will always be his kid and he will always be able to see and spend time with her if that is what he wants.  What are names you have or are considering if I may ask?

Daisiesinmygarden

I agree with Pesky. I would ask for his opinion and would not choose something he hates, but I wouldn't choose something I wouldn't have chosen otherwise. Maybe pick a few names that you love and let him choose one, if you feel you must. Or let him give you three options for LO's middle name, with you choosing the one you like or veto them all if they are not something you can live with.

BrideBuddies

I think the best way for both of you to connect over this child is to work together to come up with a name that BOTH of you like.  The more you include him in the whole process, the more enthusiastic he'll get.