I don't understand my thermometer

leslie13510

I feel like I'm running a slight fever.  I take my temp orally (no I haven't had anything to eat or drink lately and yes the thermometer was all the way under my tongue Mom!) and it reads 97.7  I take it under my arm and it reads 99.2 which = roughly 100.2.

The eff is going on up in here? 

Clearly I have some rare tropical disease, that I've miraculously contracted here in the desert mountains of Colorado, and I'm dying.  That's the only possible explanation.  Somebody please come watch the duo (oh noes, I did it again... I mean Riley and Nathan) until DH gets home.  TIA.  LYLAS.  NFT.