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Decision made

aurora1974aurora1974 member
in TTC after 35

Hello ladies.  Well, DH and I have decided that after this cycle we are going to stop treatment and just go it on our own, understanding that it may never happen.  This was an incredibly difficult decision to come to because I want to continue on, but DH doesn't.  Plus I'm not in a good state of mental health because of all of this.  So we've decided that due to money reasons and for the sake of our marriage (and my mental state) we are going to stop with the treatments.  Still haven't decided if we're doing IUI or TI this month, but whatever the outcome it's the last time we'll need to make that decision.  I will probably still be lurking on here,(I can't seem to stay away) but probably won't post very much. I wish nothing but the best for all of you.  This board has gotten me through so much this last year and has been a wealth of knowledge as well. 

Here's hoping you all get BFP's soon. 

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Re: Decision made

  • mtlaurelmtlaurel
    Wishing you all the best.
    TTC #1 since June 2010
    Me: 36, DH: 42
    Dx: DOR and MFI

    DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
    Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal

    IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
    IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
    DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
    DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!

    SAIFW/PAIFW
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  • klm195klm195 member

    I hope this cycle is THE cycle for you and you come back with your BFP news!

    I think it takes a lot of strength to decide to stop treatment.  But at some point you have to say enough is enough. I'm sorry to hear you are suffering not only physically, but mentally too.  I think it's something we all question...what is this doing to me?  Am I strong enough to keep seeing BFNs?

    I wish you good luck and I hope you do come back and post and visit!  I know I've not posted much here, but the support I've gotten so far is amazing!

    Take care!

    Married September 2010, ttc since August 2010. So far - nothing
    Me: 40, Husband: 33
    After an emergency D&C on Nov 8, 2011, we are giving up hope of ever becoming pregnant.
    PAIF/SAIF Welcome
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers PitaPata Dog tickers image
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  • Mrs.McIrishMrs.McIrish member
    I wish you the best. It's tough to make a decision you don't want to make. I've read a few books lately that show how damaged the marriage can become due to IF and typically, the woman's obsession with it. I never want that to happen to me and DH and I'm sure you don't either. Perspective is important.  We have to live the life we have, not the one we wanted/couldn't get. Good luck always.

    TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
    DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
    5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
    OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
    DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
    DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
    CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
    DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

    DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
    First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

    K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

    imageimage

    SAIF/PAIF Welcome


    http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

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  • areverearevere
    Wow, I really admire that you're making a decision together to put your emotional health and your marriage first. I hope that whatever the outcome, you are happy and healthy, and your DH is too. Good luck! And keep lurking and posting. Let us know how you're doing.
    Me = 38, Husband = 31. TTC since 1/10. M/C at 8 wks 5/10. Started trying again 9/10. All tests normal: AMH/MIS, FSH, HSG, SA. Estradoil high. 6/20/11 - Clomid+Ovidrel+IUI#1=BFN. 7/17/11 - Clomid+IUI#2=BFN. 2 natural cycles = BFN. 10/6/11 - Clomid+Ovidrel+IUI#3=BFN. 10/31/11 - Clomid+Ovidrel+IUI#4 = BFN. 11/26/11 - Follistim+Ovidrel+IUI#5 = BFN. IVF#1 - Menopur+Follistim. 2 ET 5/11/12 = BFN.
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  • trishdeleontrishdeleon
    I really commend you for that decision....good luck to you and yours!!!  
    TTC 4 years Husband-50 Me-36 'UNEXPLAINED INFERTILITY" 6/15/11-period started 6/16/11-us showing 23 antral follicles 6/17-6/21-clomid 50 mg 6/23/11-follistim inj (150 mg) 6/26/11-US (3 follicles 26, 26, 19) estradiol 1100 OVIDREL TRIGGER AT 7 PM 6/27/11 IUI #1 (60 million sperm post wash) 6/28/11 IUI #2 (60 million sperm post wash) 7/5/11-progesterone level 7/12/11- first day I can do pregnancy test
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  • Country Girl in the CityCountry Girl in the City
    So sorry that you have had to make these difficult decisions.  I am wishing the best for you.
    BFP on IVF #2 6/29/2012. Beta #1 7/3 = 522; Beta #2 = 1180; Beta #3 = 6491 image BabyFruit Ticker
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  • owlprofowlprof member
    I agree with the other ladies - it sounds like you guys are making the (hard) decision to do what's best for you and your marriage.  Good luck with this last go-round!
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  • 10-4LilBuddy10-4LilBuddy member
    Wow - I commend you for making this hard decision.  Good luck!
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  • shyntrueshyntrue
    ((Hugs))
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  • lhcooperlhcooper member

    That is really courageous.  And I'm willing to bet that once you make the decision, that BFP will in fact come your way sooner than you might think.  And even if it doesn't, you sound very much like you know what you need to do for yourself and for DH, which is amazing.  

    me - 41 (dx: DOR); DH - 53 (no problems); 7/18/09 - married!; 8/4/09 - BFP on first (real)try; 9/14/09 - missed m/c; 9/15/09 - d&c; 11/09 - 3/10 - 4 natural cycles = BFN; 4/10 - dx hyperthyroidism caused by Graves' disease; 6/10 - thyroidectomy; 7/10 - 12/10 - 1 natural and 5 medicated IUI cycles = BFN; 1/11 - new RE; dx low ovarian reserve (AMH .42; 1/26/11 -- BFP (ectopic) from IUI #6; methotrexate 2/10/11; 6/2/11 - IVF #1 = BFN; 9/12/11 - prescreening for DE; 9/15/11 - IUI #7 (unmedicated)= BFN; 11/8 - begin DE cycle (shared risk program); 12/5 - ER (5 eggs/4 mature/3 fertilized/2 left by day 5) 12/10 - ET of one 1BB blast (expanded, "fair" quality), none to freeze; 12/22 - totally shocked by +hpt; beta #1 = 413; #2 = 3952 2/14 - CVS reveals a healthy baby girl! EDD: 8/27/12 DD born 8/31/12, 10 lbs 10 oz and perfect in every way. 
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  • happywifemomofonehappywifemomofone member
    Wishing you all the best!  Please don't forget to let us know if you get your BFP on your own.  We can always use some encouragement around here!
    TTC since 10/09 Me-43 DH-44 RE and testing 10/10-11/10, Recommending IVF 1/11 New RE AMA and DOR-DH low motility IVF #1.1 cancelled 3/11 due to poor response IVF #1.2 May 2011, one perfect 8-cell embryo, 3dt-BFN, IVF #2.1 Converted to IUI d/t poor response. New RE 9/2011. IVF 2.2 completed using HGH,EPP,DHEA, Q-10 and accupuncture. Transferred one 8-cell, grade one embryo on 10/19. BFP 10/31/11 Chemical pregancy on 11/2/11. Started stims for IVF #3, our final try, on 12-2-11. ET on 12/18. Transferred 3 Grade A embryos-BFFN Planning DE IVF, late March/early April- Donors ER expected to be 4/2-4/4. PAIF/SAIF welcome
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  • danish16danish16 member

    Sounds like you made the right decision for the two of you.  You never know - my 40 year old co-worker went through a few failed IUIs and they had given up on any further interventions, assuming they would never get pregnant on their own. 1-2 cycles later, she was pregnant and now has a lovely little girl.

    Wishing you all the best, no matter what happens!

    Me: 41, DH 43 TTC #1 since 8/09 CP 10/09.
    3/11 Clomid-Ovidrel-IUI #1-progesterone= BFN.
    5/11 Femara-Bravelle-Ovidrel-IUI#2-progesterone=BFN.
    6/11 Femara-Ovidrel-IUI#3-progesterone=BFP!
    Beta #1 7/1: 39. Beta #2 7/5: 301 U/S 7/19 - saw HB!!
    EDD 3/12/12
    DD born 3/5/12
    Baby #2 Beta #1 12/16: 439.  Beta #2 12/18: 1240
    EDD 8/22/15


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