WWYD re: Ex?

Zista

I've stayed on friendly terms with my ex... as in big-ex, together for almost four years, asked me to marry him, last big relationship before DH, etc.  We rarely communicate, but we're Facebook friends and once in a while send each other a note about how great it is to see each other doing well in life, yada yada. 

He wrote me one of those notes the other day so I went to his FB profile... and surprise!  He has a second kid listed.  A seven year old kid.  Which would put her conception smack dab in the middle of our relationship.

Even though I've moved on (and am oh so grateful I said "no!"), this is really bugging me.  Loyalty and integrity are important to me, and I don't think I can stand even being FB friends with someone who abused my trust that way, even if it was seven years ago. 

WWYD... confront him and find out if it's true?  Just defriend him?  Do nothing... the past is in the past so why should it bother me? 

LauraLynneC

any chance it's a child of a SO?  FB doesn't have step- designations so my children have my DH listed as their "father" despite being their step-father. 

StellaZ

LauraLynneC:

any chance it's a child of a SO?  FB doesn't have step- designations so my children have my DH listed as their "father" despite being their step-father. 

This. Maybe they even adopted? It's odd for an OLDER child to show up all of the sudden? I'd ask for sure...he might lie but I'd at least inquire about the kid, it's a normal thing to ask regardless. It would bug me WAY too much not to know, or at least try to get an answer.

JDCSKF

LauraLynneC:

any chance it's a child of a SO?  FB doesn't have step- designations so my children have my DH listed as their "father" despite being their step-father. 

 

This...my step son has me listed as his mom on FB. I'm 35......he's 21. No way did I have him when I was 14!

zazzu

Curriosity would kill me. It'd bother me forever to not know the whole story. And like pp's said, maybe it's a step child.

Seattle_JiLLn

zazzu:

Curriosity would kill me. It'd bother me forever to not know the whole story. And like pp's said, maybe it's a step child.

This - I would have to ask.  I'd just say "FB says you have a seven year old... when did that happen??" 

Zista

JDCSKF:

LauraLynneC:

any chance it's a child of a SO?  FB doesn't have step- designations so my children have my DH listed as their "father" despite being their step-father. 

This...my step son has me listed as his mom on FB. I'm 35......he's 21. No way did I have him when I was 14!

Ah, thanks, never thought of that!  That would make me feel WAY better.  However, I'd be surprised... his wife looks awfully young, and I've never seen pictures of another daughter...

You are all right.  I'll just ask.  I'll be surprised if he answers, though. 

The other thing is that his wife has mysteriously disappeared off his facebook page.  He's still listed as married, but her name and all her photos disappeared, including the early ultrasounds where she tagged him.  Maybe she blocked me since I never accepted her friend request (I've never even met her, so I have a rule about that)?  Weird, weird, weird.   

doublem

Zista:

JDCSKF:

LauraLynneC:

any chance it's a child of a SO?  FB doesn't have step- designations so my children have my DH listed as their "father" despite being their step-father. 

This...my step son has me listed as his mom on FB. I'm 35......he's 21. No way did I have him when I was 14!

Ah, thanks, never thought of that!  That would make me feel WAY better.  However, I'd be surprised... his wife looks awfully young, and I've never seen pictures of another daughter...

You are all right.  I'll just ask.  I'll be surprised if he answers, though. 

The other thing is that his wife has mysteriously disappeared off his facebook page.  He's still listed as married, but her name and all her photos disappeared, including the early ultrasounds where she tagged him.  Maybe she blocked me since I never accepted her friend request (I've never even met her, so I have a rule about that)?  Weird, weird, weird.   

That is totally weird.  I'd definitely ask in a nonchalant way - please do, because now I'M really curious!

JRS72206

zazzu:

Curriosity would kill me. It'd bother me forever to not know the whole story. And like pp's said, maybe it's a step child.

This! Ask, Ask, Ask!! 

WatchPot

doublem:

Zista:

JDCSKF:

LauraLynneC:

any chance it's a child of a SO?  FB doesn't have step- designations so my children have my DH listed as their "father" despite being their step-father. 

This...my step son has me listed as his mom on FB. I'm 35......he's 21. No way did I have him when I was 14!

Ah, thanks, never thought of that!  That would make me feel WAY better.  However, I'd be surprised... his wife looks awfully young, and I've never seen pictures of another daughter...

You are all right.  I'll just ask.  I'll be surprised if he answers, though. 

The other thing is that his wife has mysteriously disappeared off his facebook page.  He's still listed as married, but her name and all her photos disappeared, including the early ultrasounds where she tagged him.  Maybe she blocked me since I never accepted her friend request (I've never even met her, so I have a rule about that)?  Weird, weird, weird.   

That is totally weird.  I'd definitely ask in a nonchalant way - please do, because now I'M really curious!

What she said! Be sure to fill us in!

Zista

As anticipated...  no response yet.  Boo.

kaskade

Gah!  That was one of the things I wanted to check tonight.  I want to know too!