I need opinions!!!! WWYD?

M&MBride0506

Okay, as you all know I'm saving money for the IVF.  And I had about 4500 and just needed like 6000 more.  We were scrimping and saving but we spent some.  But my sister in law and her husband asked to borrow 3500.  Now, they are the couple that everyone asks to borrow money from, they never need money.  But for whatever reason, they are having a hard time, which, who isn't? And they said that if we lent them the money, they would pay it back in a month and they would allow us to use their credit card for 5000 and then we would only have to save 2000 for the ivf.  We would have to pay back the credit card of course but...I'm like amazed.  I'm excited at the prospect that we could start ivf earlier than I had first thought...but should I do this?  I mean, we know them and we know that they are good for the money, so it's not that.  But WWYD?

Thanks.

baze2

IMHO don't do it. Nothing comes between families faster than money.

But then again, the credit card thing is scary. I would never put IVF on a credit card. I mean we did but we paid it off within one week of the charge showing up (we used the cc for the points but virtually paid cash) The interest rates scare the crap out of me.

I would say no to the loan unlessyou have borrowedfrom them in the past. and No to the CC and keep saving...

 

madelyn07

I wouldn't do it. 

I agree with the PP. 

Borrowing money from family is a sticky situation. 

I'd never feel ok using someone else's credit card. And I'd also never put IVF on a credit card..unless you had the cash and were just doing it for points/miles/money back/ect. 

 

NMscubagirl

Just my humble opinion: Unless they have a good history of handling money extremely well, and they have a track record of paying things back on time, then you could possibly throw your hard earned and saved IVF money down the tubes. It always feels good to help someone out, but if you don't really have the means to do it, it is OK to take care of yourself and say no. You really need this money. 

cookie_queen

Money and family don't mix.

I wouldn't do it. 

theworms

i agree with baze and madelyn

i hope you figure out the best thing for you and DH

GL cutie

thebeadinglady

See I am split on this. If your family is like mine, I would absolutely do it. We are very close, and at some point everyone has borrowed for somebody in our family. And if it came down to it I would put an IVF on a cc, but cc debt doesn't scare me much as long as you know you can pay it off. I figure the possibility of a child would be worth the interest rates.

On the other hand if your family is like my in-laws, I absolutely would not do it. DH's family is a black-hole for money. He has paid for their mortgages, phone bills, car payments, and his bro's cell is even on my DH's name a credit (which has come back to bite him in the a$$ many times). It is only recently he has been able to say no to them and it is only because we need the money now. 

Good Luck with what ever you decide. It is a hard choice, I know how hard it can be to wait such a long time to start IVF. (((hugs)))

mdluv21

I agree with the others about money and family not mixing.  I don't think I would loan them the money...what if something fell through and they couldn't pay you back?  Then you would have even longer to save for IVF.

I don't agree with the other ladies about putting IVF on a credit card.  We paid for IVF with cash but put meds and intralipids infusions on a credit card.  It was low interest rate and we paid it off pretty quickly.  People finance cars, houses, etc.  I don't see how paying a little interest on your future child is a terrible thing.

I would NOT put it on someone else's credit card though - that just seems like a fight waiting to happening.

I am sure it is very tempting though because I am sure you want to start IVF sooner than later, so it is easier said than done and you are the only one who knows your family situation so maybe something I would never do with my sister, is fine with yours.

GL with everything.

emca

I wouldn't do it, but that is just my opinion.  I feel like money is a really weird thing between people, especially family members. 

Mandy_Lou83

baze2:

IMHO don't do it. Nothing comes between families faster than money.

But then again, the credit card thing is scary. I would never put IVF on a credit card. I mean we did but we paid it off within one week of the charge showing up (we used the cc for the points but virtually paid cash) The interest rates scare the crap out of me.

I would say no to the loan unlessyou have borrowedfrom them in the past. and No to the CC and keep saving...

 

I agree w/ this.

matt'sbride

I wouldn't do it. They need $3500 but they could pay you back in as little as a month? I don't know these people, but that just sounds fishy to me. Also, it would be much more satisfying (IMO) to save the money ourselves without having to go into debt, even if it's someone else's credit.

Then there's the idea that I don't like to borrow/loan money to people I know. I think it complicates the relationship, or could even ruin it. It's just not a situation that sounds like a good choice to me. I'm sorry to say it though, because I know how badly you want to start IVF. (((hugs)))

DeputiesWife

madelyn07:

I wouldn't do it. 

I agree with the PP. 

Borrowing money from family is a sticky situation. 

I'd never feel ok using someone else's credit card. And I'd also never put IVF on a credit card..unless you had the cash and were just doing it for points/miles/money back/ect. 

 

This 

love2b_mrst

I don't think we all know enough about your family and your SIL to tell you what to do.  Everyone is different, and every family is different.  I know that I would loan my brother money in a heartbeat.  If he asked me for it, I would know that he was really in need, and I also know his personality and he would do whatever he had to do to pay me back ASAP. 

As far as the cc thing, I agree with mdluv.  While I wouldn't use someone else's cc, I would put IVF on my own cc in a heartbeat.  And my H and I are very anti-cc...we just spent a couple of years paying off all our stupid cc debt from our younger years, and it feels great to be cc debt free.  However, there is nothing more important to me right now than having a family, and unfortunately this is not something that you can just put off and put off until you have enough money.  Before we were lucky enough to find a job with insurance coverage, our plan was to start saving as much as we could for a certain amount of time that we were comfortable waiting to start IVF.  Then we were going to finance the rest of it with a low interest cc. 

That being said, we were also going to purchase the guarantee IVF plan so that we didn't spend a bunch of money and if we weren't successful have nothing to show for it.  With the guarantee you get a big percentage of your money back at the end if you don't have a take-home baby.

Sorry your choices are being dictated by finances...it sucks and is so unfair.  I hope you come up with a decision you are comfortable with.

Ginger71

Families and money don't mix,IMO. We bought into DH's brothers house so he could give his wife a brand new house and we used it as a rental.  It's been a collossal mess from the beginning from work needing to be done on the house to dealing with relators when we decided to sell.