Opinions needed.

Angiee930

Ok so I have this friend who is pregnant with their second baby, they are going to do the registry and whatnot but she she putting stuff for herself and her almost 3 year old on it, I would love to here opinions on this and see what other people think. In my opinion I see this as wrong and very tacky to put gifts that are meant for new baby for yourself and your toddler.  

dragon_chica

Is she doing this registry for a shower someone's throwing for her?  If so then yes it's tacky.  If she's doing it for herself to get the completion coupon then I don't see anything wrong with it.

morgs&chad

dragon_chica:

Is she doing this registry for a shower someone's throwing for her?  If so then yes it's tacky.  If she's doing it for herself to get the completion coupon then I don't see anything wrong with it.

This.

RoxyLynn

Showers and registries are for first-time Moms only.

cherokeemomma87

If she is having a shower and putting things on the shower registry for her and #1 then yeah thats very tacky. Most people are against having a shower for your second baby, I dont go one way or the other. Some circles/families throw a shower for every baby, to each their own. But putting things on a shower registry that are for you or kid #1 is wrong in a big way.

Angiee930

Thank you! I totally agree, I am still very up and down about having another baby shower for my 2nd baby, I am more leaning towards a no on that and maybe having a little welcome baby party with just great friends and food and what have you. I just think that she is being extremely selfish about the "mommy and big sister need some nice things too" attitude. 

tmac1022

dragon_chica:

Is she doing this registry for a shower someone's throwing for her?  If so then yes it's tacky.  If she's doing it for herself to get the completion coupon then I don't see anything wrong with it.

my thoughts exactly, actually my first thought was she probably just wanted the completion coupon, besides who cares? It's really not THAT big of a deal what her motives are.

shockleyh

I'd probably LOL if I went to pull up a registry & saw this.. depending on the item. If it's a nursing bra/ nursing cover/ other baby-related thing a mom will NEED to care for the new baby, I see no problem with that. I hope this is for the completion coupon but I'd probably add that stuff after I had a shower.. if I had a second shower. I think that's up to the circle of people involved. My family does a smaller shower for 2nd babies, especially with large age differences or with gender differences.

BallSox

I'd say it's none of your smurfing business what she adds on her registry.  Roll your eyes when she's not looking if you must but unless she explicitly asks "What do you think about me adding my personal items and items for the first born on this registry?" keep your opinions to yourself. 

awollenweber

If she is telling people about the registry, I'd think she is doing it for more than the completion coupon.  I agree that it is tacky...

I plan on waiting until I get my coupon and then adding a bunch of extra stuff, so I can purchase it and get the discount, but the chances of my friends/family seeing it is minimal.

MissMommyMac

RoxyLynn:

Showers and registries are for first-time Moms only.

I disagree with this. I find it quite normal to have a shower for every child, as long as someone offers to throw you one and you don't throw it yourself. It's a celebration of that individual child!

sleepingbeauty

i've heard of this before and i also see it as being tacky.  the shower is for the baby.  yes, some people will bring gifts for the mom or for the older sibling so they don't feel left out, but you don't put that stuff on the registry.

sleepingbeauty

MissMommyMac:

RoxyLynn:

Showers and registries are for first-time Moms only.

I disagree with this. I find it quite normal to have a shower for every child, as long as someone offers to throw you one and you don't throw it yourself. It's a celebration of that individual child!

i agree with this.  especially if your mom or sister or best friend really wants to throw you a shower for #2+, or it's a different sex, and you're not including stuff for #1, i don't see a problem with it.  i threw my sister a shower for both of her boys.  it was just a nice time to get together and celebrate before the baby came.

rhubarb123

Actually a shower is to shower the NEW mom-to-be with things needed for her baby.  IMO it is not a celebration of the new baby (that would be a welcome baby party - the baby would actually be there to celebrate!).  I would definitely give the side-eye if I saw things on there for herself and her toddler.  Hopefully her hostess is smart enough NOT to include the registry info on/with the invitation.

meygan1228

I don't think showers are for first time moms only! There's a modern rule of ettiquette that applys now -  if there has been a considerable amount of time between baby 1 and baby 2 (or baby 4 and baby 5) or the new baby is the opposite sex of the last baby, it is perfectly acceptable to have a show for this baby. (In our situation I have a 7 yo DD from a previous relationship. My DH and I married last September and this is his first child. My MIL is throwing me a shower but invited my entire family and my friends along with her side of the family so everyone could celebrate the baby. All but a few will be attending - even those who came to the shower for my 7 yo DD!)

 That being said, remember not to lose sight of the focus of the shower. THE BABY. For the friend to register for gifts for herself and her older child is totally unacceptable. It's not a wish list it's a baby registry.