Announcement Question..

Alicia_22

This might be a stupid question but... Right now we are in a legal risk placement as they are having to terminate the birthfathers rights. They are not concerned about it but I was curious when we should send announcements. I wish I could go ahead and send them but I'm wondering if we should wait until the rights of the birth dad have been terminated? Her birth mom will not give any information about him so it's not that he won't sign, we just don't know who he is unfortunately. 

Junebride007

I would wait...It's just me but anytime there is a slight chance I would rather be safe. I always look at the pros-and cons.. Pro to waiting.. you get to celebrate when it it official.. cons to waiting... you have to wait.. pros to sending.. you get to tell everyone right now.. cons to sending.. you would have to tell everyone if it fell through.

katiej23

We are in the same situation.  No one is worried, but we are having to 'wait it out' and advertise for the birth father.  I decided to send announcements.  Finalization for us won't be until DS is about 6-8 months old, and I wanted people to know about him before then (we had a suuuuper fast placement - not many people knew we were adopting even).  I decided that if something DID happen, the people who received announcements would be the ones who I would want to support us in that situation. 

MrsKolasa

We didn't finalize until Luke was 9 months old, but since he was born right before Christmas, we sent a birth announcement/christmas card. I understand why people wait, but I couldn't. I also agree with Katiej, if something were to have fallen through, we would need the support of the people who got the announcements.

Do whatever you feel is right.

MamaB2009

We had a similar situation.  We had to wait the 30 days for them to search the putative father registry before rights were terminated.

We waited until after the 30 days.  She was born in early November and we just sent combo Christmas cards/announcements in mid-September.  Most of my friends who have biological babies, seem to wait 6-8 weeks, so it didn't seem unusual to me.

ETA:  We did not wait for finalization to send announcements.  We just waited until after all rights had been terminated.

FinallyMrs.G

MamaB2009:

We had a similar situation.  We had to wait the 30 days for them to search the putative father registry before rights were terminated.

We waited until after the 30 days.  She was born in early November and we just sent combo Christmas cards/announcements in mid-September.  Most of my friends who have biological babies, seem to wait 6-8 weeks, so it didn't seem unusual to me.

ETA:  We did not wait for finalization to send announcements.  We just waited until after all rights had been terminated.

This exactly to a T. We waited until BF rights were terminated but not until finalization. We just finalized when she 5.5 months old, I wanted people to know long before that.

MamaB2009

UGH...and I meant December...not September.  Stupid Mommybrain.

FinallyMrs.G

MamaB2009:

UGH...and I meant December...not September.  Stupid Mommybrain.

I knew what you meant

Alicia_22

Thanks for the advice. I'm going to wait and talk to the attorney to see what the timeline looks like for terminating his rights. I don't mind waiting a month or so, but I don't really want to wait longer than that! Everyone knows about her already, I just want to send cute cards with pictures!  

Dr.Loretta

We waited until TPR was complete for both birthparents. It took 6 months, but it was still exciting to send out announcements

GLynn2009

We brought DD home on 9/23 and sent annoucements out right before Halloween. I wanted everyone to know about DD before we attended a holiday event and no one knew who the toddler was.