POLL : Would you paint your son's toenails?

I<3MYHUSBAND

So if your son saw your toenails painted and really wanted his toenails painted, let's say blue in case color matters, would you paint his toenails for him?
[Poll]

KellyMRocks

Yup. and I have. Finger nails too.

EmmieB

I will also let him go out wearing only a diaper/shorts, wellies, and a super hero cape if he wants and we're just running errands/playing and he's not going to freeze.

kids should be allowed to express themselves. if not when you're a kid/teenager, when?

EmmieB

KellyMRocks:

Yup. and I have. Finger nails too.

what color?

m&m818

I voted other. I'd leave it up to my DH. We kind of set a rule, that I got all veto rights for girl stuff (ear piercing, make up, clothing, hair length/color etc)

And DH gets veto rights for any boy. I would be fine with it, but wouldn't do it if my husband said no.

KellyMRocks

EmmieB:

KellyMRocks:

Yup. and I have. Finger nails too.

what color?

Toes pink. Nails were totally hooker red.

 

 

kittylove

I voted yes, andit wouldn't matter what color, and we could do his finger nails too.  I would also let him have a shaved head, long hair or a mohalk painted blue, pink, purple or all 3. Bodies are for self exspression and as long as it all can get washed away, taken off and changed over time it is fine. Just no tatts or ear stretching till he is 18 and he can't pierce his tounge till he is off our medical.

fjaril

my old board had a discussion on this after toegate (j crew ad with the pink toe polish).

we're fine with it. whatever.

danandkelly

For sure, and fingernails too. 

My brother spent YEARS with painted finger nails and toe nails all colors of the rainbow.  It didn't harm him in any way, I think it's perfectly okay. 

Smuches4u

Another Yes here.  I have been known to put eyeshadow on the boy as well if we're playing dress up - sometimes vampires, sometimes superheros.  One time he wanted to be the bad guy and asked for a dark eye (black eye).

DH would likely be mortified if I let DC out of the house with fingernails painted any sort of femme color, but toes are easily hidden to save ego & regularly only get me an eye roll.

soon2Bkranz

I vote the "other because it depends on his age mostly Right now no way...I have painted JLKs a few times but she is too young to sit still so I dont do it very often.

But old enough to sit stil and not get in on his clothes and my couch...sure why not

Mrs.BoomBoom

Yes, but nail polish is only for home until teen years

MommySteph2009

Funny, DS was asking me to paint his last night.  I was painting mine dark grey.  I did not, but not ruling it out, although I think DH would.

StefandTodd

Absolutely positively.  This actually came up years ago between me and an ex-bf and was sort of an argument (me: why would you say no? him: reasons that made me cringe and realize he wasn't right for me ) ...so it's actually something T and I have talked about enough to know that it would be totally okay in our house (assuming kiddo is old enough to actually want his toes painted, and could sit still long enough to not make a mess, etc).

AvaLikeLava

kittylove:

he can't pierce his tongue till he is off our medical.

LOL!

megan0071234

I will let either of my kids do whatever they want to their appearances as long as it is not permenent. When they are teenagers, they can pierce whatever or do their hair however they want. No ear stretching or tattoos until they are out of the house though. DS wants his ear pierced really badly, but is too chicken to do it. But overall, I think that there are so many other battles worth fighting, and that the parents should be the supporters of their kids physical appearance (unless my daughter looks like a ho, then that is a different story). If they choose to be really individualistic, chances are they will be teased by someone else, and they should have you to defend and support them.

teambaumer

I wasn't allowed to polish my nails or to touch makeup until I was 16. I will do the same with LO. Regardless of sex.

But, if I wasn't sticking to my rule, I'd let him!

futrkingsley

I wouldn't tell him no because he's a boy.  But I'm not super keen on little kids in "make-up". My neices (4.5 and 3.5) both wear nail polish ALL the time.  And one nephew has shown up iwth it too and he's the same age as DS.  It's not gender thing for me though, it's an age thing.  Even though it doesn't hurt him/them, I kinda want to hold off on that stuff a bit longer.

alibee09

KellyMRocks:

EmmieB:

KellyMRocks:

Yup. and I have. Finger nails too.

what color?

Toes pink. Nails were totally hooker red.

Hooker red ... I love you, Kelly.

I<3MYHUSBAND

I ask because I came home last night from getting my toes painted blue, and Darrian REALLY wanted his toes painted. I painted them with some blue paint I had (he got to pick green or blue). Dh wasn't *very* happy, but not really objective. My Mom had more to say about it but in a joking manner. I was curious on everyone else's thoughts because I didn't really think twice about it but then after wondered if others would do the same.

SarahCee

I voted other too. It would depend on his age, same if it were our daughter. DH wouldn't go for it. DH's cousin painted her sons' nails about a year ago, he was 7 at the time, I guess he was pretty adament about wanting it done even though his mom warned him that he might get teased for it. He was REALLY teased bad for it, and asked her to take it off when he got home from school that day. I would be hesitant to do it at that age just for that reason, I'd be kicking some kids' a$$es.

EmmieB

alibee09:

KellyMRocks:

EmmieB:

KellyMRocks:

Yup. and I have. Finger nails too.

what color?

Toes pink. Nails were totally hooker red.

Hooker red ... I love you, Kelly.

ditto

EmmieB

MrsJulieT:

*Putting on my flame retardant suit*  Ok I'll be the odd ball out and say no. Dh has said absolutely not. While I know it is not the popular opinion on this board at all, we believe it's ok to teach gender roles and that telling him no nail polish is for girls is ok. That difference between men and women and boy and girls are ok and is part of the reason we are male and female and not all one gender.

 With that said, when I was working  in before and after school child care I did paint boys nails because it was ok with their parents and they weren't my kids so it wasn't my call.

i understand where you're coming from, but I've also never seen nail polish as being just for girls. certain colors, sure, but all nail polish? nah. especially given it's temporary.

I also am a firm believer that a lot of that is genetic, as it were. those cliches are there because of the innate behavior of boys and girls and things like tool kits for girls and nail polish for guys are just fun games.

 

danandkelly

MrsJulieT:

*Putting on my flame retardant suit*  Ok I'll be the odd ball out and say no. Dh has said absolutely not. While I know it is not the popular opinion on this board at all, we believe it's ok to teach gender roles and that telling him no nail polish is for girls is ok. That difference between men and women and boy and girls are ok and is part of the reason we are male and female and not all one gender.

 With that said, when I was working  in before and after school child care I did paint boys nails because it was ok with their parents and they weren't my kids so it wasn't my call.

This is NOT a flame, so please don't take it as such.  I'm honestly curious, and this goes to anyone who voted "no" about the nail polish.

Do you feel the same way about "boyish" things for your daughters?  Will you preclude your daughters from say playing in the mud, catching bugs, climbing trees even playing with trains or cars etc since those are stereotypically "boy" things to do to define gender rolls.  Or is a girl who chooses to play with those things simply a "tomboy"?

 

My.ABC.Life

teambaumer:

I wasn't allowed to polish my nails or to touch makeup until I was 16. I will do the same with LO. Regardless of sex.

Ha!  I was thinking the same thing!  For me it was make up in HS, can't remember about the nail thing, but I used that peel off "Tinker Bell" crap for years!!

I was at my niece's 8th bday party this weekend - a nail and girly things party.  As I was painting her 7-year-old friend's nails - a bright purple - the little girl said "Oh fun, my mom only ever lets me pain then light pink"!  OOPS!!  Hope my SIL asked the mom's approval first! 

Celyn

My husband had older sisters who dressed him up and painted his nails on a fairly regular basis.  He's quite straight and well adjusted.  People who insist that child follow gender roles they don't understand limit their children's ability to learn about it and develop as individuals, imo.  Now, the question should be would I do it if he didn't ask and the answer is no.

2bearichards

I am not going to put on a flame free suit because I believe everyone should do as they want with THEIR kid.

That said, no, I will not paint my son's nails.  I feel you have to draw a line somewhere.  I believe there are some things that are meant just for girls, makeup and nail polish among them.  I have already had this conversation with my son regarding makeup because he has asked when he sees me get ready.

2bearichards

Mrs.BoomBoom:

Yes, but nail polish is only for home until teen years

How do you explain that one to your kid when he is old enough to understand?  If it is something you are hiding, why not just say no?

ChristinaMT4

My boys have all had their toenails painted. They've also played with my shoes and purses, and all of them had a baby doll when they were little. Some people feel that allowing those things is harmful, I don't. As a matter of fact I feel that not allowing them the freedom to explore these things is harmful. Telling a child who is too young to even know what gender is that they can't do something because they're a boy or a girl seems so unnecessary and even mean. In this day and age I see no reason why we place limitations on a person based on their sex. I mean, why can't a boy cook, clean, take care of babies, wear pink, etc? And why should a girl not learn how to change a tire or mow the lawn? All of these rules about gender seem so silly and outdated to me. 

MadameD517

Another yes. Both of my brothers had their nails painted when they asked for it, actually it's how they learned their colors. Even if H had an issue with it I think I'd argue him down, on principle. It's not like you're giving your kid a tattoo.

Celyn

Last I checked, Johnny Depp is clearly a man with a devoted female following.  If painting his nails and wearing eyeliner hurt his rep as a sexy man, it wasn't noticed.  Lots of guys manage to do it without gender confusion. 

fricksgirl

Another yes here, I will, and I have. He thinks it's funny in the summer.  Whatevs, not a big deal to me.  But, I kind of secretly hope my kid is like a crazy Adam Lambert style teenager.  I'm all about the dramatic, the expression, the make up.

I've already been told I dress Simon "crazy" by the teachers at his school because he has tons of babyleg legwarmers and a pair of leopard print pants (a la Steven Tyler).  Sure, they were from the girls section but the kid rocks 'em out hard and even being bald would NEVER be mistaken for a girl wearing them, because I pair them with rocker-style shirts, etc.  I love that kind of androdgynous David Bowie rock look, even for my kids. If Mystery (the Pick-Up Artist from MTV) and Bret Micheals can do it and look hot, I'll gladly let my kiddo take a stab at the eyeliner.

I only WISH my husband would wear it!!! 

 

I<3MYHUSBAND

No flames for Those that say "no". I think my DH would for sure say NO and prefers to stay in gender roles. He just doesn't really force the issue because he knows that I think it's a double standard. I actually just did it not giving It much thought.. I actually knew LOTS of guys in HS who wore nail polish, usually black. And all were straight if it mattered. Only after D came to me and said daddy said why do I have nailpolish that is for girls.. And I just told him it usually is girls who wear it but sometimes boys do, just not as much. Anyhow I think more people feel like my husband or like some have said here... But don't feel comfortable saying it.

Mrs.BoomBoom

2bearichards:

Mrs.BoomBoom:

Yes, but nail polish is only for home until teen years

How do you explain that one to your kid when he is old enough to understand?  If it is something you are hiding, why not just say no?

I think you explain it just like you do everything else.  You need shoes on to go outside, you need a jacket because it's cold, you have to take a bath after you've been playing in the mud.  Why allow it at all?  Because it's fun...just like playing dress up.  Like ABC, I used that tinkerbell stuff forever when I was a kid!  I would also do my kid up in make-up...but once again, only at home.

tiki_t

I do!!! 

SportyMrs.23

No.  I'm with Julie on this one.

 

And for the mud playing, etc.  I don't consider that "boy" only things.  Make-up, imo, is for girls.  Now...I wouldn't let Lilly where a jockstrap to her softball game because jockstraps are for boys.

Mrs.K&C

MrsJulieT:

danandkelly:

MrsJulieT:

*Putting on my flame retardant suit*  Ok I'll be the odd ball out and say no. Dh has said absolutely not. While I know it is not the popular opinion on this board at all, we believe it's ok to teach gender roles and that telling him no nail polish is for girls is ok. That difference between men and women and boy and girls are ok and is part of the reason we are male and female and not all one gender.

 With that said, when I was working  in before and after school child care I did paint boys nails because it was ok with their parents and they weren't my kids so it wasn't my call.

This is NOT a flame, so please don't take it as such.  I'm honestly curious, and this goes to anyone who voted "no" about the nail polish.

Do you feel the same way about "boyish" things for your daughters?  Will you preclude your daughters from say playing in the mud, catching bugs, climbing trees even playing with trains or cars etc since those are stereotypically "boy" things to do to define gender rolls.  Or is a girl who chooses to play with those things simply a "tomboy"?

 

I knew this question would come up. No we will not tell her that she has to stay clean and can't play cars or suggest that she not pursue a career that is seen as a "mans" job.

We will encourage her to be more lady like and teach Ryan to open doors for people (yes we will teach both kids to open doors for people out of respect for others but especially emphasize that men open doors for women and we think that that distinction is ok to make if that makes sense). 

We will teach Ryan to cook, but he knows that mama cooks dinner. Yes we know that a lot of men cook and that many men hold successful careers as chefs. It's not that we don't want him to know how but in our family it's something mama does at home and I will probably encourage Taylor to help me more at dinner time with cooking than Ryan. Likewise he will probably be encouraged to help daddy in the yard more than she will. That doesn't mean they won't be allowed to help in the other stuff at all.

I'm not sure if that clarifies it or lands me on people's blocked lists, maybe some of both. 

And although these are the views we hold for our family, we most definitely teach them that every family does things their own way and that is ok. Some kids are allowed to cuss some are not, it's what makes families different and unique. 

 

Julie, I know our values are different and we have some very different opinions but I think you're very respectful and I totally respect the choices you make for your family. Just because we're different doesn't mean we can't enjoy conversations or exchange ideas or what not. I hope you continue to share your thoughts and opinions. How boring life would be if we were all the same. 

SweetieP

I wouldn't voluntarily paint R's nails. I have explained to them that makeup and nail polish are for girls.  If he's going to insist on it, I'll do it...but probably something like blue or black or purple or something more masculine.   Go ahead and judge.  I don't care.  

mrs.moosie

I'm not a mom yet, and am like 3 days late with this post, but, hey, why not share anyway?

I don't think I would paint my future  toddler son or daughter's toes. More than being a "girl thing", it's more of a "big girl" thing (to me). I would allow my daughter that priviledge when she's older, maybe in middle school. I figure, the more I "give" to a baby, the less I can slowly introduce and use as incentives when s/he is older. I also plan on waiting to allow my daughter to have her ears pierced or wear two-piece bathing suits or shave her legs. I want my kids to be comfortable and enjoy their time as kids without feeling a need for what I consider "grown up" things.

But, I don't have kids yet, so who knows what tune I'll be singing when the time comes. I have plans and ideas, but they're not too rigid.

amyfelice

futrkingsley:

I wouldn't tell him no because he's a boy.  But I'm not super keen on little kids in "make-up". My neices (4.5 and 3.5) both wear nail polish ALL the time.  And one nephew has shown up iwth it too and he's the same age as DS.  It's not gender thing for me though, it's an age thing.  Even though it doesn't hurt him/them, I kinda want to hold off on that stuff a bit longer.

this is exactly how I feel. I wouldn't do my daughter's nails either until she's older, maybe 6 or 7. At least I don't think I would right now.I also didn't think she's be watching Dora twice a day so who knows? If she cries hard enough..  

ETA: It' s also toxic and I work hard to use non toxic, paraben free, petroleum free products wherever possible for both of us so I don't like any extra toxins. I don't even do my own that often.