Washington Babies

~shar01~

Hey mama, responding to your f/u on the FFFC (thought it might get lost in there.)  I'm so sorry for the passing of your heart cat Yasha.  What a great thing to have given her a wonderful home for the last six years of her life.  I totally understand that you need to be ready for another one, and sometimes it takes a while to heal so that you can fully bond with the new one.  It makes complete sense that you have not felt as connected to Zola, particularly as she is fond of your DH and of course now you are busy bonding with your little one.  Does Zola like playtime or treats?  Some of the things we've found to be hits in our house- the laser pointer (followed by treats so they actually get a "reward" and not just continual frustration when they can't "catch" the dot :), a toy called the Flingamastring, wand toys like Da Bird and sparkler wands, treat dispensing toys (for clever/food motivated cats- Ball of the Wild is a good one, or Kitty Kongs), the ping pong balls with the rattle inside and ribbon "tails," catnip and/or honeysuckle toys and the kitty DVDs with animal footage.  Of course, ours have each other to play with so that lessens their dependence on us for entertainment, but when we play with them those all go over pretty well.  

Also, do you have set mealtimes or free feed?  You mentioned feeding her, so if you're the one doing most of the meals, and at set times (well, 2x a day feedings, anyway, even if the time every day isn't exactly the same) she may start to feel a closer association with you as her caretaker and help her hopefully want to connect with you more than currently.  If your DH mostly feeds, or if you free feed, switch it up (when you have time- my DH does a lot of feedings when I'm nursing/getting DD to sleep, exhausted, etc.) and see if that helps over time.  I'm willing to bet she'll come around eventually.  MY DH's cat is VERY strongly attached to him and it took a long time for her to really "like" and now love me, and I really had to put a lot of effort in because she's such a Daddy's girl.  Feeding, treats, playtime, quick pets when she'd let me, etc.  She'll never love me as much, but it's gotten close. :)  

Hope that gives you some thoughts.  Hang in there, I know it can be rough and there have been times I've threatened to ship mine all to the circus when they're naughty little pests, but things do get better.  If you ever want to bend my ear about anything cat-related, or otherwise, just let me know! 

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Re: ~shar01~

  • Thanks for the advice!  I'll have to try the kitty treats from a dispensing toy.  Z loves treats but it might be more fun for her to have something to play with & then receive a treat.
    As for feeding, DH & I switch it up (I feed her in the morning & he feeds her at night - that's when she gets wet food & dry food).
    Last night I made an extra effort & stayed up an extra hour after G & DH went to bed to read on the couch & invited Z to sit on my lap.  She did sit with me for about 5 minutes.  This morning she actually jumped on the bed purring.  I think she wanted to cuddle more but G woke up & was hungry so I couldn't cuddle.
    I am going to stay up & read again tonight for a little bit & see if Z will sit on my lap.  She doesn't need to love me, I just want us to get along Smile

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  • Aw, I'm so glad she sat with you and showed some interest in cuddling!  That is wonderful. :)  Hopefully she will continue to come around more in time.  And I hope she enjoys the treat dispensing toy too!  If I might make one suggestion, I'd try alternating night feedings, if you only give the wet food at night.  Cats are much more satisfied (digestively speaking) with wet food due to the greater amounts of protein/moisture in it, and if you are the one giving it to her at least sometime that will help strengthen the positive feelings she has toward you. 

    (Or just ditch the dry food entirely and go all wet. ;) 

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