How do you deal with rude comments?

Bashert628

My DS just turned 1 yesterday, and I'm due again November 9 with #2 and we're thrilled. I've been getting the spectrum of reactions when telling people I'm pregnant. My parents were ecstatic (which is what I expected). My grandmother and MIL's reaction was immediately "how are you going to pay for another one?". Not a congratulations (although MIL congratulated us after it hit her, but my grandmother is a piece of work and won't congratulate us). I basically told my grandmother that unless she is paying for us, how we are going to pay for another baby is not her concern. My BFF was happy but I could tell she was thinking in her head "what the heck is she doing???". That's the basic reaction that I've gotten from most of my friends though, and it's the reaction that I hate the most. What do you say when people give you the side eye for having 2u2?

MammaBear81

The best thing to do with rude comments is smile and nod...  I find the most rude comments come from people without kids, or the ones who have 1 or two kids that are out of control and seem to think that all kids are that way.  You can respond with a snarky comment, but they usually don't help the situation.  We have an au pair (so fixed childcare costs), boy and girl clothes, cloth diaper, and EBF and still got the same "how are you going to pay for another one?" comments... (yes I do realize they will cost money in the long run, preschool, college, activities, and plenty of unplanned expenses) people just don't think.

I don't understand why people just don't get that the proper etiquette for someone announcing a pregnancy is an enthusiastic "congratulations" and a big smile and hug.  Anything else is just wrong.

beebe929

Well my Dad told me in early pregnancy (my step brother's kids are the same age difference as mine, but a couple months older) "you guys are having your kids too close together, 3 years was the perfect age difference"... um ok Dad, you know I can't change it! uggh

the "you have your hands full" comments are annoying.  Good luck!

saturdaynightdoubletree

My grandmother had 7 children and everyone always made rude comments to her, so I've just stolen her response.... "I love sex!"... it usually catches people off guard and they back off.

In all seriousness though, it's your life, not anyone else's. Feel comfortable with your decision. Embrace your two precious babies. Let go of the negativity others bring to the table... it's not their concern and the only person that is really losing sleep is you, and it's not worth it. GL!

katie052409

saturdaynightdoubletree:

My grandmother had 7 children and everyone always made rude comments to her, so I've just stolen her response.... "I love sex!"... it usually catches people off guard and they back off.

In all seriousness though, it's your life, not anyone else's. Feel comfortable with your decision. Embrace your two precious babies. Let go of the negativity others bring to the table... it's not their concern and the only person that is really losing sleep is you, and it's not worth it. GL!

 

Im definitely stealing this one!!! Love it!!!!

WhitePicketFence

I actually haven't gotten many rude comments yet, however, I'm sure that when I'm out in public with the girls later that they'll start rolling in.

WorkingTeenMom

I laugh and just let it go. The people saying these things don't know how it is. They don't know the situation and they're just talking to talk. Don't give them a reaction because it will only make them happy and you miserable. Though sometimes it might feel good to give them a piece of your mind, it won't help anyone out in the end.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Sweets2005

I used to get them all the time when I was pregnant, now not as much. I just would smile and nod and mentally flip them the bird.

Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha

I understand 2u2 can be surprising, but UGH! Come on people! It's not like it's Octo-Mom or something!

Surprisingly, I haven't gotten as many comments this time around as when I announced I was pg with DD (my own mother's first reaction was "Was it planned?") When I do get comments, I usually tell people that's just how my husband and I wanted things to happen. It's a pretty boring answer, but it's kind of hard to argue when someone says "I want it that way" AND I find it usually makes people realize that the question they just asked was rather douche-bag-y. So yeah, it gets the point across and shuts people up. Win-win

smssy2005

When my husband told his Mother she started screaming and blurted out "Was this planned". I remember my first pregnant MIL was a huge source of conflict for me. I am just working on letting her reaction go. It's not about her. It's hard though because DH and I are happy, and a baby is a blessing. Why can't everyone see that?

smssy2005

When my husband told his Mother she started screaming and blurted out "Was this planned". I remember my first pregnant MIL was a huge source of conflict for me. I am just working on letting her reaction go. It's not about her. It's hard though because DH and I are happy, and a baby is a blessing. Why can't everyone see that?