how to introduce 14 month old to sibling?

nhstar

Just wondering how you made the transition. Did the older child come to the hospital to meet the baby? How soon? What do you say to a 14 month old to make them understand? I'm guessing you dont....

I'm just not sure how all this is going to go down.

ridesbuttons

Big brother did not come to the hospital.  We were only there a day anyway.

We made no big deal about the baby when we came home.  I walked in and greeted DS1 (who had grown into a huge little boy in the one day I was gone with these BIG GIANT HANDS) and DH followed carrying little brother in his carseat.

We let big brother 'find' his little brother on his own and then made the introductions.

 

howleyshell

17 months here.

He came to the hospital.

I took wrapped gifts to keep him entertained because hospitals can be very boring places for toddlers - one for each day and things he'd play with for a while like a magnadoodle or new book.

As for how to introduce?

We made sure he was in the bassinet instead of me holding him. 

We just said "Here's your brother.  This is the baby that was in Mommy's tummy.  Now he's on the outside and he's going to be coming home to live with us."

He looked at him, looked at me, posed for some pictures and went about his business.

Totally clueless.

In fact I thing the bigger issue for him was that he'd been without Mom (which was unusual at the time) so he was kinda like:  Yeah, what ever.  Just schooch him over so I can snuggle my Mommy.

He barely noticed the baby. 

 

Telyco

Mine are 13.5 months apart. DS did not come to the hospital b/c of swine flu - they weren't letting any kids in. I had a c/s so I was there for three nights...he was home with my mom and DH went home every day to put him to bed...but then came back to the hospital with us.

I think having DS come to the hospital would have been overwhelming for him...and I'm glad he didn't come (not that we had the choice) But in thinking about it - he would have been too young to process where mama was and why she couldn't come home...what all the wires were and everything. Basically - the only reason to have him visit is because I would want to see him...not really what was best for him. If he was older maybe I would feel different.

When we brought DD home he gave her kisses and looked at her. BUT his little lip came out the second she started crying. He cried when she cried for about a day - and then he couldn't have cared less...but would give her a kiss here and there while passing by.

BrittKav

She came to the hospital about 3 hours after the baby was born. She sat in the bed with me and I held them both while she looked the little one over. No explanation needed.

kcisthebombdotcom

DS came for very short visits to the hospital. My parents were watching him so they dropped by for 1/2 hour visits everyday. The first day, he was a bit unsure. He pretty much ignored the baby and went about playing with a balloon in my hospital room. lol. When we got home, that's when they really got introduced. He had missed me in the hospital, so I was holding both him and DD in my lap at the same time.

Although I didnt think he could understand much, I still did read him a big brother book everyday (and it's still his favorite!), told him about his sister coming, etc. When I finally introduced him to his sister, he clapped. lol. So he did realize a little bit.

MStason

DD spent a fun night at grandmas house and then once we came home she spent 3 days going on adventures with her aunts and grandma. She was great with DS, giving him kisses and she enjoyed laying in bed with us while I nursed him.  What really seemed to help was everyone giving her attention still and keeping her schedule up. I still gave her breakfast, DH still gave DD her bath. Grandma still took her to the park 2 days a week. We would tell her the baby loved her so much.

I think being so close in age helped

RNOHIO

DD came to the hospital the day that I had DS (I had him at 4am and she came that evening).  She didn't really understand that he was coming home with us but she was very gentle and liked to kiss him.  When we got home she was fine.  The first few days she didn't want that much to do with him but after a week or so she LOVED him.  I don't think that you need that much explanation.  They won't fully understand anyways.

saturdaynightdoubletree

DD had baby dolls first. We practiced putting them in the bouncy seat, crib, etc. etc. When DS was born DD came the next morning to the hospital and loved meeting the baby and touching his hair (she's still obsessed with rubbing his head). At this age they understand, but have a hard time communicating back. I just told her "this is your brother. we're going to take him home and love him and take care of him." Once he was home she started carrying baby doll around EVERYWHERE with her, and continued putting them in all his seats, etc. feeding them and mimicking everything I was doing.