Preemies
How often do you visit the NICU? Intro
I had my boys on 4/7 at 31 weeks. They are both doing great. Breathing on their own and increasing on feeding. They are tiny born at 2lbs 8oz and 3lbs 4oz. I came home yesterday and today was my first full day home. I manage to make it to the NICU for a 2 hour visit. I got to hold my LO's and I came home. I hurt my incision getting off the car and now I feel like crap. I couldn't make it back to see my boys and say good night. I feel horrible. I sent MH on his own with my BM and asked that he spend time with them. Is it normal to feel this bad and is it normal to want to heal also before making so many trips out? I guess I am lost and don't know how to feel...
Birth story is in my blog.
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Re: How often do you visit the NICU? Intro
Congrats! I'm glad your boys are doing well.
I visited Andrew once during the day (usually a couple of hours, but more at first when I wasn't back to work part time) and then once again at night when my DH got home from work. That said, we live 5 minutes from the hospital, and had no pets or kids at home. We also took about 1 evening a week off to do something "normal" (like go on a date) to keep our sanity.
Please don't be yourself up. Do what you can but also take care of yourself. You need to be healthy when your baby boys come home!
First of all, congrats on the birth of your babies! I have a totally different situation in that I had DS out of state while visiting family. I just graduated with my masters so I didn't have a job (except a part time one) so I stayed with him pretty much the entire 4 months in the hospital. There were some days that my in-laws had to drag me out and make me spend at least one night in their home just do I didn't go insane. Hubby went home to keep working so we didn't go completely broke. :-)
In the end, we ended up deciding that we were moving to where he was born since we really liked the doctors that took care of him (pediatrician) and my perinatologist who saw me on a regular basis while I was on bed rest.
It is completely normal for you to feel bad. I did all the time about anything and everything. But in order for you to be your best around the babies, you have to take care of yourself as well! I hope they continue to do well and have a short NICU stay. Keep us updated!
First off Congratulations on the birth of your little boys.
I remember going to the NICU for a few hours in the morning (DH went back to work the following week), usually I had to get someone to drive me there. And I stayed for two hours or three. Once DH came home from work and we had dinner we would return after shift change and stay another 2 or 3 hours. It was the hardest thing we ever had to do was leave her at the hospital. I remember crying every night, not sleeping very well, having awful dreams, waking poor DH up in the middle of the night, asking for my baby.
I know the doctors and nurses say for you to get as much sleep possible and try to get better and it's hard. I read your birth story and you are truly a strong mama. Having to deal with all the trauma and now the NICU.
I pray that you start to heal soon and that your LO's have an uneventful NICU stay. Please stick around the ladies are this board have wonderful advice and love to listen. Please keep us posted.
I visited 2X per day. I wanted to be there for LO's afternoon feeding and evening feeding and bath. I also pushed myself too far in the beginning and hurt my incision. I had let DH take a few visits for the team. I felt horrible but the NICU nurses and my Dr kept reminding me that "if Mommy doesn't feel well you won't be able to take care of the baby."
Honestly, I never left - to the point that my health suffered because of it. I lost 33 lbs. in less than 2 weeks - I credit it to the NICU diet. I would spend 14-18 hours a day there. It seemed like I would get there...do a feeding & before I knew it the next feeding would be an hour away so I would tell myself why not just stay for the next one & then the process would start all over again.
I did not sleep, I did not eat, did not take care of myself & when he finally did come home it wasn't good for me. My advice don't stress too much about it. Do what you can do & do what your body tells you to do. My body told me it was too much but I ignored it.
Hang in there!
First off - Congratulations Mari on your boys
So glad to hear that they are doing well!!
The first few days after I was discharged it was hard for me to go to the hospital for long periods of time because of my incision. So we went probably twice a day for an hour to do their feeds/care (morning and afternoon). I would then call before bed, and then again around 3am when I got up to pump. Once I started feeling better and could drive myself I went up every morning and stayed through the morning feed and noon feed and then went home for the afternoon. Then we would go back up when DH got home from work. We were also really blessed to only live about 10 minutes from the hospital.
Don't feel guilty right now if you cant get up there as much as you would like. Like pp have said, you definitley have to take care of yourself so you can be at your best when they come home
Please please let us know if you need anything - this board is so extremely supportive 
FAQ: My Friend Just Had a Preemie, How Can I Help?
Congrats on the birth of your twins! It's perfectly normal to feel guilty when you aren't able to spend 24/7 with your sons. My second son spent 3 weeks in NICU last year and I was only able to spend 2-3 hours with him a day. Because I was a PT independent contractor who worked from home, I returned immediately to work following delivery. Add a 2 year old to the mix and our family living out of state, I just wasn't able to spend much of my day at the hospital. I just reminded myself that he was getting the best possible care from the nurses and that I would get a lifetime to spend with him very shortly. The fact that he slept 99% of the time made it a bit easier too.
Hope you are able to bring your sons home soon! Take care of yourself!