Parents who dont RSVP!

jencastorri

My daughter's 6th birthday party is this Sunday and I have ahd one parent call me and say they cant make it. I ran into another parent a few days ago and she told me they would be there. I sent out invites last week to the 19 kids in her class and other than 2, no one else has responded. I told them to call, text or email so there is no reason not to respond! The same thing happened last year. We've only been in this town for 1.5 years so im not sure if it's like this everywhere or is it jsut happening here? We rented a moonwalk and would like to have known how big to make the cake and how much of the other things to provide. Its so frustrating.....If youre one of the parents who dont RSVP then shame on you!

luvbeingmom

i think it happens everywhere...

what's worse is people who DO rsvp, and then don't show up...

i had a party planned for 50 people, half of that actually showed up

at least if they don't rsvp at all, you don't have to count them lol

neverblushed

Yeah -- this is annoying.   I generally think that people who don't RSVP are going to be a no show, but I always feel compelled to buy extra goodies and favors, just in case.  It's a drag.

But... I never invite the whole class, so the actual number of people who don't RSVP to my kids' parties is a lot lower. 

littlemermaid

I think it's everywhere.  When you give people multiple options to respond I just don't see why it's so hard to just RSVP.

lizloo85

We invited 3 boys and 3 girls from DD's class. One did RSVP and show up; never heard from any of the others. I was kind of hoping that they would all show up w/out rsvping. Good thing she has lots of cousins to invite also!

lizloo85

StarAnnice:

Oh, I haaaaate that! 

There has only been one party I didn't RSVP to.  Honestly, I didn't know about it.  She did evites and didn't give anyone a head's up.  I never look at my evites unless I am told to (much like PM's).  I had no idea he was even invited until about 6 months later. 

 

LOL  

 

Now he just has an early start for the next one. 

mama.bear

I hear ya!

katieisawesome

My DD's birthday party is next Friday and I only have confirmation from like 3 parents (and we invited over 20 kids).  It will be interesting to give my headcount to the venue and see what actually happens  I am thinking of sending out a follow up reminder this week (I sent out invites a few weeks ago to allow parents time to plan since the party is during vacation).

notkateanymore

I've found that asking for Regrets Only works better then RSVP. That being said, there are still rude people in the world that don't do the right thing and they should be shot. 

It's one of my biggest pet peeves actually. I'm planning two huge parties in the next couple of months, so I'm sure it's going to happen again too. 

Surfinbride

This is a common problem. I'm sure some areas/social groups are a little better than others... but, I don't know anyone who gets the replies that are expected.

When my daughter was in preschool, we had to invite the whole class. People had no respect. Maybe it was because it wasn't their friendship, but their child's. Most parents did not reply. Some replied the day of the party. We were already at the place we rented for the event... when we got home, we had messages from people saying that they were coming. I had mailed nice invitations with an RSVP deadline... I gave my phone, email and home address. Their lack of response was surprising. 

To deal with it every year after that, here is my system. I know it isn't good form. However, if no one appreciates a beautiful proper invitation enough to respond, I will not mail one.

I use evite. I also send a note in the email with the details in case they don't like or want to open the evite. I send it out a month in advance of any event. I use the evite options to send follow-up. You can send to the whole group or specific groups. I send a note to those that have not responded by the deadline (usually 2 weeks prior to the event). Let me know if your lil darlin will attend. I want to make sure I have enough goody bags and treats (whatever) for each child.

Now that my daughter is older (9) and most of the parents are friends, I'll put in something silly:

If you don't reply YES or NO, I'll assume NO. Then, we'll lock the doors... block you from the bounce house and eat all of your cake and ice cream.

About one week prior, I send a reminder to all YES and MAYBE guests...you know, the good ones. We are looking forward to celebrating with you!

If I never hear anything, I will call and play dumb (evite shows that they opened it). Hello, I'm X, A's mom. I tried to send you an evite, but I must have a bad email address or a typo. We'd love to have your lil darlin on date/time. Will she be able to join us?

I'm sure Emily Post would not approve, but my headcount is always accurate.

 

vanessa11411

It'll happen year after year. It sucks.

jlw2505

I HATE parents that don't RSVP - I just find it rude.  Actually, I hate it generally when people don't RSVP.  I invited my DH's 2 sibs and parents to my DD's party back in March and they never said anything about getting the invite or if they were coming.  I had to ask them!  I am one to RSVP within a day or 2 of getting the invite.

Ilumine

I hate this too.  So what I ended up doing with SS's friends was JUST planning for the kids who RSVPd. 

When a parent showed up with their kid, I would politely pull them aside and let them know that since I didnt know that they were coming, I did not have enough food, party gifts and in two cases, tickets for their child. 

While I did not stop the child from participating, I did not provide them with the extras.  And in the case of the two tickets, I did not pay for the child to go into the water park or the movie. 

I dont mean to be a cold hard witch, but I have limited funds and I have limited funds.  The money wasted on the "just in case" can be used for SS and DD to do activities during the year, their favorite name-brand snack or hell, my yearly massage. 

I will not feel bad because of a PARENT'S lack of consideration.