What do you think about your SO going out without you?

aussiebabies

So DH is out at the bars tonight  and I'm left at home with DS watching the Wiggles He's actually been pretty good this preganancy about not even asking to go out without me and it's his friend's birthday so I was pretty nice about it but....I guess I'm just feeling bummed. I like to have a good time too and I feel like I have officially been pregnant or breastfeeding FOREVER. I wish I could just go out to a bar with my buddies and let off steam too! Not mention I'm feeling as big as a house and can't stop about thinking about all of the cute not pregnant girls that will be out tonight. It's not that I don't trust DH but still, it's just a sucky feeling..

Has you SO gone out without you this pregancy? How did you feel about it?

toadstool

Mine has not, but I wouldn't be that upset if he did. I will say that I would have an issue with him drinking now that I am on bed rest. It would be just our luck that I would have to call my mom to go to the hospital again for pre-term labor after DH had a few. I really wouldn't want him driving me and our unborn child if he had been drinking, so that would really tick me off.

KERJF

I dont have another LO at home already - but i dont mind if DH goes out with friends. He doesnt go out often - but mostly it was after days where he had class (weekend masters program) and would hang out with people then.

blugoldqt

I was on bed rest for 3 months and SO is in 3 bands and a recording producer..... needless to say I spent 99% of my time alone.... he would be at bars 3-4 nights a week but he isn't out "partying" and doesn't get drunk....so although I was jealous and lonely, him going out to that environment didn't bother me....

gymnst1013

Yep, he has.  Hasn't bothered me in the slightest.  I've gone out without him too.

pam1005

DH does every now and then. I don't have an issue with it though.  I really don't want to go to a bar with smoke around a whole bunch of guys anyways.  I get my time when I need it and DH works a lot, so it doesn't bother me.

Unexpected16

My boyfriend goes out usually 1-2 nights every week and I don't like it at all.. I just started my 7th month and wish he would rather stay home with me than be out at the bar  

rickandcaitlin

Really sore subject for me right now. I am so beyond mad at dh. I have been feeling neglected and alone for about a month now. He keeps promising me to spend time with me but something always seem to come up that's "better" then hanging with me. I was put on bedrest on Tuesday and am home with both DS's while dh is in the desert 2 hours away until Sunday.

heysupnatalie

i've called my FI's friends a few times to get him OUT of the house! haha.
i go out every friday night for dinner with my friend and her husband, we call it "sexy date night". but i only go without my FI because he works every friday and saturday night at a restaurant, so rather than sit at home alone i go out.

AuburnTiger11

I'm sorry. 

 

My DH and I aren't interested in bars... or partying...or drinking... or anything like that.  A day hiking the mountains or going to the beach or traveling together is our idea of fun...

I have been without my husband this entire pregnancy (he lives in NC 8 hours away because he is active duty army and I am in AL in college)... and... I just accept it.. 

 

EmmysMom08

My DH has gone a couple times to an open jam night at a bar. I've gone a couple times with him. I don't mind. But i'm getting lonely and annoyed with all the band practices he's got through the week right now.

Scout05

gymnst1013:

Yep, he has.  Hasn't bothered me in the slightest.  I've gone out without him too.

This. We go out together often, but sometimes it's nice to have a boy's/girl's night out.

It might bother me if it was all the time, I guess, but honestly I'd rather eat ice cream and watch bad TV these days, so why shouldn't he meet the guys for a beer and the game?

As long as he let's me know when he'll be home, and gives me a head's up if plans change, it really doesn't bother me.

Hallil

My DH is 'socializing' at a work function right now actually. I don't mind, as long as he can function tomorrow and doesn't do it every weekend. I don't go out much, and I'm home alone all day but I know that he works hard during the week and if he wants to have a couple drinks and visit I'm not going to tell him he can't.

norbert5

DH is out tonight actually. 

I don't mind it too much.  I went out Tuesday night with my girlfriends and he went out tonight with his guy friends.  I normally have 2-3 girls' nights a month and he has one a month.  He also stays away one or two nights a week for work.  It is hard having him away, I am sure it will get harder the more pregnant I get.  But for work he has to and he's needs time with his friends so I just know that he is providing for us and taking care of himself so that he can be a better dad and husband.

I also feel like I have been pregnant or BFing forever.  I realized a few weeks back that I haven't had a margarita in two years.  I miss them, a lot.

laurakaz13

gymnst1013:

Yep, he has.  Hasn't bothered me in the slightest.  I've gone out without him too.

This. 

Epiphany27

I wish he'd go out more so I have more time to myself! I'd rather take a long hot bath and read a book than watch boring TV with him. I try to get him out of the house as often as possible but he's a damn homebody.?

minnemamabear

I would not mind too much if DH did go out, but he made the decision to give up drinking with me throughout pregnancy.  Though I would never have asked him to do this, sometimes I really appreciate that he is sacrificing right along with me!

Baileysmommy2007

My DH doesnt go out with his friends. He is totally a family man.  When he isnt working, we go do everything as a family.  We have a 3 yr old DD so we pretty much are home by bedtime except on occasion. DH got over the party phase along time ago.  Yes he may have an occasional beer or buy the occasional bottle of liquor but he doesnt make it a habit and that probably happens maybe 3-5 times a year.   

MommaA117

mine goes out for a beer with the guys every so often after work. I am fine with it. I usually get a back rub or some fast food brought home in return. He always calls and asks if it's okay with me first.

Eiskonigin

>.> Honestly, I WISH DH would go out for a little while sometimes. He has always been super clingy, even when we were dating way back in HS. We aren't old enough to drink (and since I'm pregnant...it's not like I would if I could, lmao), and he has some issues with alcohol any way, so he just won't...

But, I sometimes really enjoy his company. He works long hours. PT in the morning at 5:30, and usually home after last formation by 6 pm. I do miss him all day, and it's sweet that he likes to text...every 5 minutes...but there are times (many...) I just want to toss him his coat and push him out the door and tell him, "Get out of the house and do something WITHOUT me for once". Lol.

cwyland

Go out with him.  I felt a little awkward doing that once I started showing, but we settled into a great bar that is smoke free with karaoke.  I have a small glass of wine or a coke and we have fun like we would any other time.  He goes out 3-4 times a week right now, but it's usually just after work with the crew and he stays an hour or so and has a single beer.  I like my alone time.  It gives me time to run raids on my MMO.  Yeah, I'm that kind of geek.

 

The whole "other girls" thing doesn't bother me.  If it did, I would have lost my mind a long time ago.  He's cute, young, and works as a pirate on a tourist cruise.  I went on the "adult" cruise for my birthday and got to see first hand how bad he gets hit on.  I found it hilarious.  At the end of the night, he and the tip money go home with me.  So who cares?

ilovejud

I'm only pregnant 9 months.... If I have to suck it up and stay out of bars for that time period... DH can too.  He knows I have no desire to sit at home by myself while he goes out and drinks... so no, it doesn't happen and yes I care.  I have no family or help in the area, so if we can get a rare chance to get a sitter and get out, then we can get out together and he can take me to dinner dammit!!  After all, I'm the one who has to deal with sickness, back pain, and all the other joys of pregnancy, the least he could do is spend time with me while our baby grows in my belly.... we have the rest of our lives to get out and spend time with friends...

Nechie122

Considering how brutal DH's schedule has been at work -- and how much he's done around the house on his rare days off -- I don't begrudge him time out with his friends. Yes, I miss going out with my friends the way I used to, but I shouldn't hold that against him. That said, I do think he "owes" me a few Friday or Saturday nights watching the baby after she's born so I can have some well-deserved fun. It's only fair!

kristennd

I wouldn't find it at all healthy for either one of us for him to be stuck home with me all the time. Even now that I'm on partial bed rest and can't go out on my own. It definitely does not somehow make it more bearable if he suffers too; that's a little deranged. I regularly encouraged him to go out on his own before the pregnancy and nothing has changed. I like regularly having the house to myself. 

CarrieB.

My DH is a theater editor so he has to go to shows all the time and I don't always go with him. Sometimes he will stay afterwards to talk to people, which is okay as long as he texts me when he's on his way home. I go out without him, so I don't see what the big deal is unless he would stay out until like 3am and not tell me. 

mandicotter

first----my husband and i have always had a very honest relationship - he always lets me know if he wants to go out and i honestly let him know my thoughts on the matter.  Most of the time I say go ahead and have fun....sometimes there are those days when i want to be selfish and keep him home with me.  He understands that being hormonal it would be in his best interest to talk to me about it before finalizing any plans....

 the biggest thing is that you are HONEST - if it bothers you don't pretend that it doesn't - make ground rules together and respect each others need for space sometimes.  Make sure you take time for you too...schedule a girls day at the spa or out to eat with your friends ---balance will keep you sane!  

katejones243

To be honest in my 9 months, I've noticed my SO going out fewer and fewer. Now a days he wont go anywhere w/o me. I will say when he has guys nights once a month or so it's concerned me for the fact of going into labor and him drinking. But I will say, he knows once the baby is here those days of going out and staying late with really decline, so I want him to go out and enjoy himself while he can. Only complaint is always being the DD and never being able to drink with everyone else. But in the end the outcome of a new baby is worth every minute of staying sober Hang in there... I wouldnt worry about it unless he goes out a lot once the baby  is here and he doesnt help 

tchubirubi

We usually only go out together. All our friends know that inviting one means inviting both. Recently, though, due to DH's work situation (a very long and boring story), we have been forced to be over 900 miles apart every other week or so, which is very painful for us. I get worried sick over him travelling all that distance (a bit of which he has to do by car - a three-hour drive in a dangerous road), and having no one to help or look after him (besides travelling back and forth, he is working his ass off and taking care of the moving stuff - the bits and pieces I can't do from here), so I actually feel good whenever he says he is going out with his buddies. It seems to do him good. Otherwise, all he'd do over there is work and obsess about our current situation (even though it is temporary, it is a bummer) and that is just not healthy. I wish I could be there with him, though. I miss him so much when he is away... thanks heavens for skype.

All the best!

heysupnatalie

Hallil:

My DH is 'socializing' at a work function right now actually. I don't mind, as long as he can function tomorrow and doesn't do it every weekend. I don't go out much, and I'm home alone all day but I know that he works hard during the week and if he wants to have a couple drinks and visit I'm not going to tell him he can't.

 

HOLY CRAP YOU HAVE THE CUTEST DOGS EVER. I have 3 pits and want to do a wedding photo like this too but my FI isn't completely on board. I will have to show him this picture and make it happen.

OP sorry for hijacking this post as a way to talk about cute puppies. 

JaqiDec04

My DH is going out tonight with the guys. And in 3 weeks, he'll be gone a whole weekend. It's a once a year thing they do with the guys he runs a businuess with.

It doesn't bother me at all. I kind of like a little time to myself. I can eat cookies and ice cream for dinner, watch chick flicks, paint my nails, and generally do whatever I want. I'm actually planning on doing a little shopping, maybe vegging in front of the TV, or with my favorite computer game. 

Jessica0624

My DH goes out all the time.. Last night he was out until 11:30 and he just left now at 8:30 for who knows how long.. I feel horrible, DS is being a pain in my butt today.. But he was like this when I got with him and married him so what can I do. He does not go out as often as before we had DS so I am very grateful for that. He usually only goes out on the weekends.