Intro and nervous to request medical records

Suzie~shell

Hello all. I am a long time lurker who hasn't really had occasion to post until now. In 2007 I had a section with my son (who is now almost 4, ::shudder::) DH and I are now contemplating having another child and I desperately want a VBAC. I have never completely gotten over my c-section and I'm not sure that I ever will. I feel like my section might have been unnecessary. Even though my son was 9lbs 11ozs and I was 11 days late, I can't help feeling that if I'd fought for more time I might have gone into labor on my own. And that if I'd know more about c-sections in general and if I'd educated myself on the reasons that my mid-wife gave me for passing me on to the surgeon (placenta beginning to calcify and large baby) I might have fought harder against the c-section. I also discovered (the day I was discharged when the midwife visited me in the unit) that her son had graduated from high school that weekend and she'd had lots of family in town for the party -- the cynic in me had a little light-bulb moment that perhaps that was why I (at 11 days late) needed a Friday afternoon c-section -- so I wouldn't mess up her weekend plans. (Yes, I am fully aware that I sound a bit overboard, and it's probably not the case. Sorry, I'm just bitter that this might even be a possibility)

Whew ... that was longer than I thought it would be. Sorry. 

Anyway, I want to ask if anyone else was actually nervous to request their medical records?? I am so nervous and I think it's a little ridiculous to be scared to read them. I mean, I lived through it the first time and technically the records are mine, but after having such a negative feeling about the whole thing I wonder how much of what I was told is in my report and how much is in there that I wasn't told. I'm just so angry and cynical that I automatically think the worst of the whole situation. 

Any words of wisdom? Please?

Brownie_222

Having the feeling that your c-section was for your OB's convenience would be a hard thing to get over!  I have some doubt about my own, as I was c-sectioned after less than 12 hours of induced labor for "failure to progress."  It was 6PM.  I know the feeling of doubt you're experiencing.

I was nervous to go back into my OB's office to fill out a consent form for records transfer.  I could have done it via fax, but figured I'd get a faster response in person.  It went fine, and actually getting the records and reading them was very empowering.  I felt like I was taking my healthcare into my own hands, and also using my choice as a consumer to go to another practice this time.  I felt somewhat similar to you before I got them, but after I got them I was ready to go and felt much better.  Hope the same thing happens for you!

myantonia

I had a similiar reluctance when I requested my DS's records from birth.  He came out not breathing, had a pneumothorax and had to be resusitated.  At the time, the Dr and DH told me very little of what happend.... I really just knew that he was having a little trouble and ended up in the NICU.  Part of me didn't want to know how long he was without oxygen and how bad it was.... because then it would seem more real.  I finally requested them when my son started having speech problems and I was concerned there was some sort of brain damage due to his traumatic birth.  

All in all, I was scared.... but it did end up being sort of empowering to know exactly what had gone on. And I have to say it helps to know the whole truth when I'm trying to advocate for him now.  I imagine the same would hold for you... As you try for a VBAC with #2, it would be good to know exactly what went on with #1! 

MAprincess

I was nervous too even though I had an "uneventful" CS.  I felt weird that I was required to give them a reason for my request.  I told them I was preparing for my second birth, but I wanted to say "because they are MINE."  Also, I had to have them sent to my new doctor.  I would have had to pay for them to get sent to me which was also stupid.

Mine actually had very little useful information for me other than it did confirm that DS was malpositioned.  I am glad I have them.