Quick summary - gay couple tried to get into Golden Gate Mom's Club so their son could be in a playgroup with our babies his age, and was denied. :-( Boo on them!
Most of the mom's groups I've encountered don't allow men, single, gay, married, or otherwise. It seems mostly due to the husbands of said mom's being insecure about their wives having male friends. It's really ridiculous and sad in this case sad, and downright pathetic in others, especially given that most playgroups are attended by many who can "chaperone" the wife whose husband keeps her on a short leash, ihmo.
It seems mostly due to the husbands of said mom's being insecure about their wives having male friends.
Do you really think that's what it is? I thought it was more along the lines of infant playgroups tend to have a lot of nursing going on, and some moms might be uncomfortable with men in attendance? Although I remember I got over that pretty quickly and soon felt like everyone in town had seen me nurse!
Gay men aside, I remember a great video on Ted that had the Facebook COO talking about how to create more opportunities for women in c-level positions, and one of her suggestions was to "make your partner a real partner." Part of this was welcoming men (SAH dads) to mommy events. She'd mention stories of men at such activities, and none of the other moms would want to "play with them."
That is some crazy talk. How does a group of mom's in San Francisco manage that? If parents of all stripes aren't welcome there, where would they be?
If the dad's want play pals, they should hit up library story time (it's open to all!), make a few pals, and make their own playdates. And I can't imagine that there isn't a gay parents group to join. In SF? No way no how is that niche not covered.
When DH was the more stay at home parent to DS (from about 12 months to about 20), they hit up story time almost every week. DS and DH made friends that they saw on a regular basis, exchanged names. We never made efforts to see people outside of organized play times but it was certainly easy to get him exposed to other kids. For a while there SJ offered a different story time every single day at one library or another -- free and several other kids to play with PLUS they haul out toys after the story time is over.
What a group of assholes. I'd like to see how up in arms that same group of women get about private mens clubs of any type, my guess the stamp their feet and scream and shout.
It seems mostly due to the husbands of said mom's being insecure about their wives having male friends.
Do you really think that's what it is?
In 3 of the 4 groups I belong to that exclude men, that was the specified reason. At the other group, there were two reasons given: that one and the other was that the women felt they couldn't be themselves and talk about the things they wanted to talk about with a male present. I took that to mean they couldn't *** about their husbands if one of the dads was there. SO, given it's 4 for 4, I'd say, yep, that's the reason in my small personal sampling.
You know I'm a GGMG member and always wondered about this (why there weren't any gay/men couples on the boards, etc...). That makes me sad that they are excluded. I have found that the dads that I've met (gay or otherwise) at the playground and other playgroups have been so friendly and it seems like a real loss to the community. Sigh.
"Oh come on Gromit, a bit more, you know... alluring!!"
Re: Golden Gate Mother's Club Article in NYT - men need not apply
The Blog | BirthbyKellyM
Most of the mom's groups I've encountered don't allow men, single, gay, married, or otherwise. It seems mostly due to the husbands of said mom's being insecure about their wives having male friends. It's really ridiculous and sad in this case sad, and downright pathetic in others, especially given that most playgroups are attended by many who can "chaperone" the wife whose husband keeps her on a short leash, ihmo.
um, pardon my bluntness...
NorCalMOMS bio* NorCalBOTB* babywearingBIO
Harmony Doula
Do you really think that's what it is? I thought it was more along the lines of infant playgroups tend to have a lot of nursing going on, and some moms might be uncomfortable with men in attendance? Although I remember I got over that pretty quickly and soon felt like everyone in town had seen me nurse!
Gay men aside, I remember a great video on Ted that had the Facebook COO talking about how to create more opportunities for women in c-level positions, and one of her suggestions was to "make your partner a real partner." Part of this was welcoming men (SAH dads) to mommy events. She'd mention stories of men at such activities, and none of the other moms would want to "play with them."
That is some crazy talk. How does a group of mom's in San Francisco manage that? If parents of all stripes aren't welcome there, where would they be?
If the dad's want play pals, they should hit up library story time (it's open to all!), make a few pals, and make their own playdates. And I can't imagine that there isn't a gay parents group to join. In SF? No way no how is that niche not covered.
When DH was the more stay at home parent to DS (from about 12 months to about 20), they hit up story time almost every week. DS and DH made friends that they saw on a regular basis, exchanged names. We never made efforts to see people outside of organized play times but it was certainly easy to get him exposed to other kids. For a while there SJ offered a different story time every single day at one library or another -- free and several other kids to play with PLUS they haul out toys after the story time is over.
In 3 of the 4 groups I belong to that exclude men, that was the specified reason. At the other group, there were two reasons given: that one and the other was that the women felt they couldn't be themselves and talk about the things they wanted to talk about with a male present. I took that to mean they couldn't *** about their husbands if one of the dads was there. SO, given it's 4 for 4, I'd say, yep, that's the reason in my small personal sampling.
NorCalMOMS bio* NorCalBOTB* babywearingBIO
Harmony Doula
"Oh come on Gromit, a bit more, you know... alluring!!"