I think it must be an April Fools joke. This is what gives it away for me:
"By
the age of 4 months, our test subject started to exhibit some amazing
abilities including walking and talking. By 6 months of age, she could
read and memorize her early stage children's books and showed an extreme
level of coordination and balance ? so much so that she was enrolled in
gymnastics and ballet with children 5 years older than she was! At two
years old, she read her first 300 page book, memorized the Declaration
of Independence and (this is absolutely true) began composing her first
symphony. And at three years old, on a secret test track in Beaverton,
OR, she ran faster than a baby cheetah. Nike immediately signed her to a
(very) long-term endorsement deal."
OMFG!!! When I saw it on someone's post on Friday, I thought it was an April Fools thing or a joke item. I didnt realize it was an actual product.
"We like nothing better than buffing our Zygoma. And imagining a horny time traveling long overcoat purple scarf wearing super sleuth nordic legend fuck fantasy. Get to work on that, internet." Benedict Cumberbatch
This has absolutely nothing to do with your post, but I noticed your daughter's name is Emerson. My DD's is too - it's a family name, but we typically call her "Emme" (emmy). I've gotten some raised eyebrows over our name choice, but I still love it. Does it have any significance for you, or it it just something you liked?
Re: Umm WTH is this for real??
I think it must be an April Fools joke. This is what gives it away for me:
"By the age of 4 months, our test subject started to exhibit some amazing abilities including walking and talking. By 6 months of age, she could read and memorize her early stage children's books and showed an extreme level of coordination and balance ? so much so that she was enrolled in gymnastics and ballet with children 5 years older than she was! At two years old, she read her first 300 page book, memorized the Declaration of Independence and (this is absolutely true) began composing her first symphony. And at three years old, on a secret test track in Beaverton, OR, she ran faster than a baby cheetah. Nike immediately signed her to a (very) long-term endorsement deal."It's not real. I've been on that site before and every time the formula is sold out, I don't believe they even sell it.
Who the heck doesn't want bacon flavored envelopes though?!
"We like nothing better than buffing our Zygoma. And imagining a horny time traveling long overcoat purple scarf wearing super sleuth nordic legend fuck fantasy. Get to work on that, internet." Benedict Cumberbatch
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