Gender preferences...

carolinasarah

lily87:

so Veronika's post below got me thinking...do people really have gender preferences and why? I understand that if you want one of each, and already have one child, why you might be pulling for the other gender.

But, if this is baby #1, why would someone have a gender preference? I just don't get it. Today, most things are pretty equal (careers, education, etc). So can someone explain to me why you would be pulling for one over another?

DH and I don't have a preference at all. And, people say to me all the time, well you really do but just don't want to say, which is not true at all. While I have a hunch this baby is a boy- I would not be disappointed at all if it is a girl.

I think this may be the last time I can get some truthful answers before all the reveals...do you have a gender preference? And, if so why? I just haven't heard a good reason yet- so I am hoping someone will enlighten me.

This. I honestly don't understand "disappointment" related to gender. A fleeting thought of "oh, that's not what I expected"?... yep, as a planner, I get having to adjust when a something isn't as expected. But active, prolonged, actual DISAPPOINTMENT? Nope, not even a little. It's like a little kid who didn't get the exact Barbie she wanted for Christmas. My cousin was probably the worst case I've seen... she cried & got really, openly angry at the u/s, then sulked & acted pissy for days. I wanted to smack her, or maybe invite her to the sh!tload of testing I was having following my 3rd miscarriage. I still avoid her, actually...

That being said, my DH says he wants a boy... I'm the oldest of 3 girls & my sister has two girls. DH thinks our family is in desperate need of some testosterone, which isn't a totally invalid point. I honestly don't care though. Really & truly, I don't. A boy would be something new & exciting for the entire family. A girl would be my comfort zone & she'd get a ton of super-cute hand-me-downs. I'm so stinkin' thrilled to be pregnant that this whole gender thing is like a cherry on top

SusieBW

exoh:

 I should probably post this in Unpopular Opinion Thursday, because I am sooo going to get flamed for it, but, in all honesty, I am hoping it's a girl because I want to buy girly things for her.

 Sure, there are other reasons, like, I was the oldest of two girls and, well, actually, I honestly can't even think of a good reason that might save me.  Seriously.

 I sort of have my heart set on a girl (which is ridiculous and not a good idea, I know) and I will probably be very disappointed if I find out that I'm having a boy.

 That being said, however, I am so happy to be pregnant right now and, once I get over the inital shock if I find out I'm having a boy, I'm sure that I will be just as excited to start buying blue things and things with racecars on them, as well. 

 And, no matter what happens, boy or girl, my husband and I will love this baby so very, very much, that I'm sure, in the end, it doesn't really matter if it turns out to be an alien.  Although, that would be quite the shock, as well! 

This is me, too, but the opposite.  DH and I both REALLY want a boy.  Part of my reasoning is because I'm really not into "girly" things. Also, because I LOVED having a big brother growing up (I still love having a big brother, actually).  I guess I've just always seen myself with a little boy.

All the OWTs point to this likely being a girl, though, and I'm starting to adjust to the idea that it could very well be a girl.  I no longer think I'll be disappointed if it's a girl, and really, I'm psyched no matter what.

msmarsh

I fully admit that I am hoping this little one is a girl. I will honestly be excited either way, but like others have said I have always pictured myself with a daughter.

I think it is partially due to my rocky relationship with my brother. He was an absolute hellion growing up and caused my family a lot of pain. I love him to pieces, but it was really hard watching my mom go through some of her struggles. I guess part of me believes, deep down, that a little girl would be easier than a boy because of my experiences. I know that isn't always the case.

From a superficial standpoint, I am a complete girly-girl. I love all things sparkly, pink and romantic. I can see myself playing dress-up and Barbies and loving every minute of it. But I also know that I will learn to love Tonka trucks and superheros too if that is what my LO likes.

ladyprof

We're having twins and my real preference is one of each! I'm a bit afraid of having two boys just because I think I'll get left out a lot. Who wants to play trucks with mommy when daddy is so cool?

dianamcu

I grew up a tomboy and am really afraid of a girly girl, so I have always preferred boys.  In fact, if both our kids (our plan is to have 2) were boys, I would be thrilled - not to say I won't be if the baby is a girl.  But I want to play sports with the kid, not tie bows or play with dolls.  And I know, the girl could be a tomboy or the boy could have no interest in sports or any of the things I imagine he would.  Really, I think it's just my fears...I'm not good with make up, hair, fashion, etc, and I feel with a daughter, I would let her down.

WIth all that said, no matter what the gender is, I am going to love this baby unconditionally.  I even had a dream (pre pregnancy) about having a baby girl, and she just melted my hear.

I'm just being honest here, and if you don't like it or agree with it, tough.  I've never told anyone my fears of having a girl and her being disappointed in me, so keep in mind, I'm being open and honest here.

Elsker

I have a sneaking suspicion that some people won't consider our reason for wanting a boy as "good enough", but family heritage is something we value and is a big part of our lives. We don't know how many kids we'll be able to have, so having a boy to pass on the family name first (or at all...since DH is 5th generation of only-sons) would be a blessing and a miracle.

It has nothing to do with oportunities in career or schooling. It's not that either of us would have problems relating to either gender. It's as simple as carrying on a family name, and being unsure if it's even possible to have more children after this one.

Elsker

MaryHCagle:

  ...I want DH to experience daddy's little girl. ...   

I vote this up as the best, most selfless reason ever

We're hoping for a boy first, but I've thought about this before and I would absolutely love to see DH's face as his heart melts, in love with his little girl. He'd be so good at it