Need Help- Have a 20 month old and look the same when she was born. — The Bump
Health & Exercise

Need Help- Have a 20 month old and look the same when she was born.

My daughter is turning 20 months on Tuesday and I don't look any different than I did right after I had her.  I have tried to stick with things for exercising, I just can't seem to find a daily motivation..  I know for health reasons I need to lose the weight and also just too feel better and look better.  I am tired of not being happy about not being able to just slip on a pair of jeans and tshirt ad feel good about myself.  

DH says he loves me how I am, which is comforting at times but also it doesn't help trying to change.

What do you recommend for keeping motivation tricks, tips, goals, I am at a loss.. Stress is my # 1 killer for things.  I eat pretty healthy that isn't the problem mine is sticking with an exercise program.  I have found a few things I do like: walking (need to air up my stroller wheels), Jillian Michaels 30 day shred, and I also have a dancing with the stars dance video I have yet to use, but I know I will like it because I love to dance.  What is the best way not only for motivation, but too make up a schedule?  ex..Monday walk and shred..Tuesday..etc etc.

I can't over do it of course, but I think doing more than one thing a day is my best shot and looking and feeling better.

I am going to post my weight and goal and it is scary, but I think it is easier if I have it out there.  I currently am 265 lbs and my goal and healthy weight is 165.  I have 100 lbs to lose and that is one of the scariest things about this.  I don't feel like I have 100 lbs to lose but then again when I look atmyself I can see where it is distributed. 

I don't have many friends, and I cannot afford a gym so I am looking for inspiration and advice and help I guess to losing my large amount of weight.  I know it will take at the least a year to lose weight and a life time of keeping it off, but I am ready for it and I need it.


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Re: Need Help- Have a 20 month old and look the same when she was born.

  • No words of advice here because I'm in the same boat (except my LO is only 6 months old). Just wanted to say good luck!!! I'm wanting to loose about 100 lbs also.  Hopefully we can find the motivation together.


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  • Calories in your body have to be less than calories out to lose weight.   

     Even though exercise is important, what you eat and how much is what matters.  I would try to keep a food journal and track calories for a few weeks to see where you can cut a few out. 

     Good luck!  I swear it is so much harder to be a woman when it comes to weight issues. 

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  • I have come across a lot of people who think they are eating healthy but in reality have no idea how many calories they are taking in each day.  I am not saying this is you but like the pp mentioned, keeping track of what you eat is a great place to start.  The livestrong website has a great tool that will help you track calories.  Also I think weight watchers might have an online plan now (but I'm not sure).  I know a lot of people have awesome results with ww.

    In terms of working out I always like to choose one or two things at a time to do.  For example right now I am doing the 30DS three days a week and couch 2 5k the other three days.  My motivation is wanting to get into even better shape than before I had my son because I know a second pregnancy will take an even bigger tole on my body than the first.  

    I have never had to lose a large amount of weight like you wish to and I give you a lot of credit for trying to go about it the right way (diet and exercise).  I think if it were me I would need to set small goals for myself.  I know personally if I said "I want to lose 50 pounds" and it didn't happen quickly I would get frustrated and stop.  I think it's important to think about why you want to be healthy and exercise every day.  Think about the reasons you want to lose the weight and don't make excuses to get out of physical activities.  I think if over time you "just do it" exercise will become a part of your life and you will learn to really enjoy it.


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  • Lots of good advice already, but I thought of a couple other things.

     Because life is hectic, I like to sit with my hubby Sunday night and talk about my workout plans.  It makes him aware of what I am trying to accomplish each day, and we can talk about how we can schedule things like dinner, errands, um, baby, etc.

    Also, like rach10782 mentioned, it helps to see eating right and exercise as a lifestyle not just something to do to lose weight.  I try to think of exercise/being active as necessary as brushing my teeth, etc.  Not a maybe, but a must!

  • Get out a calendar and set your work outs a week or 2 at a time. This way you already know what you HAVE to do. Just like AmberinDenmark said make it a must. I have a schedule. I hated to work out but now that I am seeing results it keeps pushing me. Make it though the first month and it becomes routine. If you want a motivation buddy IM me, do you have facebook??? I have a work out buddy on facebook we keep each other accountable it really helps I could use another one if you want!


  • It's a hard old battle, isn't it? I restarting it myself as well.

    Few things that I have found helpful are to weigh myself at least weekly (I find it keeps me more more accountable and it's easier to rein myself in to lose a lb instead of 5lbs). Start off with one diet change and stick to it. It's easier to change one thing at a time for me then to change a whole bunch. I stick with it then. My goal for this week is to drink 8 glasses of water a day. Two weeks ago, I made myself swtich from regular yogurt to greek yogurt ( you wouldn't believe the sugar in regular!). At first it tasted horrible, but now I'm used to it and am starting to enjoy it.

    I just started using fitness pal today to track my calories. You wouldn't believe how they add up when your not really paying attention. It's only 1pm and I have only 350 calories left to use Surprise! That was a wake up call.

    No real good advice for the workouts, I find it hard too. Your not alone, and like previous post said, we can all support each other. We can do it!

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  • one thing that helped me was making a schedule.  write down what you're going to do on what day and at what time.  if it's scheduled, you might feel more obligated to do it.  good luck!  i know it's a daunting amount of weight to have to lose, but just try to keep your daughter and her health at the forefront of your mind.  you want her to be healthy and seeing mommy have healthy habits will only make her want to mimic you.  plus, with more energy, you'll be able to play more with her and run around with her.  and i think that is what will be the most rewarding part for you!
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  • I am definitely no weight loss expert..I have so much to lose.  But, after I had my baby a year ago, I ate about half of what I would normally eat and the weight went away without exercise.  I'm sure a lot of it was water weight too though. Also, just try to take a walk everyday, but the most important thing is to eat less. Good luck!
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  • My advice is to take things one step at a time.  For example, start by cutting out sweets....keep everything else the same.  I bet once you see some results from your actions, you'll be motivated to take the next step...perhaps, portion control or daily walks.  Just don't try to totally change everything all at once.

    You can do this. 

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  • Thanks everyone for the advice!  I asked my DH if we could go on a family walk before dinner 5 nights a week he agreed to it (this is also just because we never spend time together, not just exercise).  So we are going to do that walk 5 days a week probably around 20-30 minutes at a time.  Also DD and I have been taking a short walk during the day before DH gets home, usually to the park or just to blow off some energy for her (let her walk herself,no stroller).  So with two walks at least 5 days a week I think that is a good and easy start.  Also I am going to try and do a DVD workout every night, but maybe start at 3x a week to pace myself. 

    With the eating habits as it goes, I really only ever drink water as it is...Occasionally a soda (1-3 a month) and alcohol (maybe 1-3 a month).   I am not a big milk or juice drinker.  I always have a small breakfast oatmeal usually.  Then a small lunch that is pretty healthy because it is what DD eats as well.  Maybe 1 snack a day (usually someting I shouldn't have)!  Then we eat dinner, and besides eating too big of meat portions we eat pretty healthy and balanced dinners.  We barely ever have a dessert.  I think eliminating my snack or choosing to eat the healthier snack choices we have my eating isnt the problem.

    Also when we can afford it we want to purchase a weight bench set and an exercise bike, so DH and I can workout at home together! Hopefully in May we can do this.

    I've also been trying to find like a picture or outfit I want to fit in or look good in for inspiration..what do you think?


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  • What a difference a year makes!

     Definitely check out my page- it has before and "current" pictures (well from November, I need to update). I have lost 95lbs in a year and am just working on the last few.

    You can do it!

  • I like the pp ideas of setting a schedule and discussing it with YH so everyone is on board with making time to excercise and cook, like you would do anything else during your day.  Also, spring is around the corner and the longer days, warmer weather and more readily available tasty fruit & veggies may help get you started as well!

    I also love the MarksDailyApple website - it has a TON of really encouraging stories of people who changed diet and got on a workout plan and met their goals.  And its just practical stuff too, no fancy gyms or crazy diets.  I love reading the stories on there, they are really motivational.

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