I promise there is hope

AZAudiGirl

Hi Ladies, 

Just wanted to drop in (haven't been on here for a long time) and let you know that there is hope. I am sure it doesn't feel like it now but being over here on this board is a good step. I spent the first 4 months of LO life in a total mental mess. I have dealt with depression since I was a teen so I thought I would be the first to recognize PPD. I was so wrong. I didn't realize there was a problem until LO was about 3 months old. I had him in my lap and just screamed and screamed. It scared the crap out of him and he started crying hysterically and shaking. It was the worst feeling ever to know that I made him feel that way. I was the one who was supposed to keep him safe and feeling protected and the second I saw him shaking I stopped screaming and I called my friend to come over as soon as possible and she helped me make the call to my doctor. It took about three weeks until I started to feel better and a little longer until I felt great. I am now enjoying being a mother so much and have been on cloud nine (most of the time) since LO turned 6 months old. I still have a very difficult time looking at photographs from the early days. They make my heart break a little but they also remind me of how far I have come and ultimately how important it was for me to seek professional help. Sorry this ended up being so long but I just want you all to know that there is hope. It will get better.

Best wishes to all of you.

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