Swearing Alternatives

Octoberlove

I'm not a big swearer, but those satisfying four letter words do make their appearance sometimes.  When I was a nanny, I had a litany of fun swear alternatives that amused my kids.  Things like 'Mylanta!' and 'Holy Schnikes!' and the ever classic 'Cheese and Rice!'

My MIL is famous for saying 'Dirty Word' instead of actually saying a dirty word and I have a guy friend who actually has a big enough personality to pull off things like, 'Ye great baboons!'  It's pretty funny.  I'm curious if anyone has some other fun things to say, or if you just stick to darn, gosh and the like.  Or even if you let the real words fly in front of the kids.  My mom didn't swear much, but when she did, we knew we were in trouble!

mishquiche

I'm also not a big swearer, but I do try to say stuff like "Holy Shiitake mushrooms!" instead of the alternative.  DH started spelling words out the other day, which was pretty funny.  That only works for so long, though.

iHeartHimMore

I'm hoping to get a few ideas here... I need to train myself with some new words, for sure.  Lila has already repeated a few choice expletives.  Whoops!

Alli923

I swear like a trucker.  I'm waiting for the day Lucy drops the F-bomb on me.

Growing up, my Grandmother used to find funny words that sounded bad, but weren't. Like "Alabaster!"

~Lynchie~

After witnessing a curse filled road rage incident in the Cozy Coupe I decided to switch all my swear words to "Balls"  so I say "Oh Balls!" and "Balls!" instead of "Oh Sh!t" and "Fvck".   I also say "Frank" sometimes if I accidentally start the F sound.   Holden says "oh balls" too and its pretty funny to me, but other people probably just think he is talking about regular balls (like the toys, not the testicles). 

zazzu

I don't have a sailor mouth, but the real deal flies out sometimes. To me, alternative words have the same emotion behind them. If I'm mad at a drive and I call him a Son-of-a-btch or a son-of-a-buck, it's still name calling. A word is only "bad" because of it's connotation.

Seattle_JiLLn

Ben picked up some funny ones. Oh crackers instead of oh crap. And fishsticks us a pretty good all around word.

BethS2006

I had a young adult client with ASD whe  I first started (1996!) who waould say "chow fai"...  which usually ment M was p*ssed and watch out cuz he was going to flip a table...   all 6'2 of him...

Mysticblossom21

When I am in the midst of wanting to say son-of-a-b*tch, I usually end up saying son-of-a-monkey's-uncle. LOL. I have no idea how that became the alternative, it just did. Also, instead of f*ck, I say firetruck, and instead of holy sh*t, I say holy schamolies.

IkesHawaiian06

I say "Son of a Nutcracker". I don't swear very much. If I do, it's because I'm in serious pain or you've really pissed me off. Em started saying "son of a nutcracker" and my husband doesn't like it, but I told him that's better than the alternative. Other than that, I don't have anything.

omangie

Whatever happens to roll off my tongue, but if I started the F sound, it is usually "farfenuegen" (sp:)

Octoberlove

These are so great!  Especially the balls replacement-I think I will steal that one.  I kinda agree with you Zazzu on the feeling behind the word being the meaning no matter what you say.  I'm sure my child will hear me swear a plenty in her lifetime, I don't want her to think I am perfect anyway.  But I think we all know that people are judged by how they speak and I want to make sure she knows what words are appropriate in different situations.