Strange question about using potty at preschool

Grasim

So this is a strange question, but I don't know who else to ask!  My daugther just turned 3, and has been potty trained for about 4 months.  While at home, we always wipe her, especially after a #2...but I am finding out that her teachers tell her to wipe herself after a #2 at school, which is not sucessful at all....and leads to us throwing away underwear but worse, she has almost like a diaper rash type redness from not being cleaned.  I don't know if this is normal, and maybe they are trying to teach a 3 year old indepenence, or if I should say something to them?  She said that her teachers tell her "Wipe yourself" which just seems to be asking a lot of a little 3 year old.  It's a strange subject so I don't want to confront the teachers unless it's out of the ordinary.  What do you think?

bim38106

I think 3 years old is definitely too young to be wiping themselves after #2. DD's teachers wipe her after #2 for sure (I'm not sure if they do if she just pees?).

I would say something, probably non-confrontational like "DD hasn't learned to wipe herself well enough after a BM and gets a rash if not wiped. Until she gets the hang of it, please wipe for her". I don't see why they couldn't (or really why they don't already) do so! Then again, at DD's preschool, they don't have to be PTed, so maybe that makes a difference? I don't think it should though, because it's unreasonable IMO to make a just-3y/o wipe themselves after going #2.

ArcticFox

My DD has only gone #2 at home.. somehow she has never need to go somewhere else. 

And we had the same prob at home, she wasn't wiping well enough until very recently (she JUST turned 4).  The thing too is she uses wet wipes for #2 at home.  I don't think she'd do a good job with toilet paper either, and not when she was younger.

shopgirl78

Is this a preschool that required DC be PTed prior to entrance or a daycare like setting?  

Generally, if a preschool requests that DC be PTed prior to entrance, they usually mean completely PTed (which would include wiping and pulling up pants).  

In our daycare, they assisted DS with wiping until the 3 year old class.  He now does this independently but doesn't always do a good job.  Sometimes we get skids.  They wash out easily.... In teaching DS (and DD), we used the flushable wipes.  I'd let DC wipe first and I'd wipe and we take turns til the job was done.  Eventually, I'd let them wipe and check after they though they were done.   

lmdbww

The preschool that DD will be going to in the fall does not give any assistance in the restroom. They must be fully able to do the whole thing themselves, including wiping, and there is no potty ring either (which I am going to have to start working on w/DD).

I guess in case of an emergency they assist, but not on a normal basis. They claim that it has something to do with their licensing but i'm not sure of the specifics.

Jinsy80

They don't help with wiping at nursery school, since the kids are supposed to be 100% PT to attend. I don't think DD has gone #2 there anyway, and she doesn't wipe herself very well either.

st.lucia bride

shopgirl78:

Is this a preschool that required DC be PTed prior to entrance or a daycare like setting?  

Generally, if a preschool requests that DC be PTed prior to entrance, they usually mean completely PTed (which would include wiping and pulling up pants).  

Ditto this.  DD has been at a preschool since 2.5 that required the child to be independently potty trained before entrance.  Luckily we haven't had any problems with her being able to wipe herself, sometimes she doesn't do a perfect job but it's usually fine.

Can you teach your daughter to wipe herself at home so she gets a lot of practice?

KristinKD

Like others have said, our preschool requires kids in the 3s classes and up to be potty-trained completely, including wiping. DD1 is in a 2s class which still allows diapers and wiping, which is a good thing because she's not wiping herself well yet, although she always waits until she's home to poop anyway.

If independent wiping is required by the school, I don't know that there's much you can do besides practice wiping at home. You might ask if it's possible for you to send flushable wipes for her to use at school.

jlw2505

At 3, the teachers help the kids.  They have them do it first and then they do a check to make sure they were wiped well.  I know there are times that it doesn't happen and some of the staff are better at it than others but 3 is too young to be wiping totally on your own.

BackBayGrrl

bim38106:

...I would say something, probably non-confrontational like "DD hasn't learned to wipe herself well enough after a BM and gets a rash if not wiped. Until she gets the hang of it, please wipe for her"...

This 

esweet

I'm the director of a preschool and her teachers should most definetly be helping her wipe herself.  3 years old is still new to using the bathroom and having them wipe themselves after #2 is asking for too much.  They will learn eventually, but for now the teachers should be helping her.

MrsAmers

Is there a reason you are throwing the underwear away? Why can't you just wash it?

As for teaching DD to wipe herself, I generally let her try to do it herself first and then I would check her and do any additional wiping that was necessary. I would say by 3 1/2, about 3 months after she trained, she was doing a good job 90% of the time.