Sad about weaning

sanae78

I decided a while ago that I was gonna wean at a year.  Or maybe just nurse but not pump at work at all anymore since it's stressful to think about finding the time and she doesn't NEED it anymore.  We're at 13.5 months now and down to my last few bags of frozen BM.    I worked 3 nights in a row a couple weeks ago and didn't pump and I think that made my supply totally tank.  I'm down to nursing in the am and either before I leave for work or at bedtime.  I never even feel full anymore so I'm pretty sure our nursing days are numbered.  I don't know why but I'm sad about it.  I thought I'd feel free.  I think part of it is that we're not totally sure if we'll have anymore kids and I'm sad that she's growing up so fast.     

MrsZiz

I remember the same feeling when I weaned Bella. Even though I knew we would have more kids, I still felt sad a little bit. It meant she was growing and becoming more independent. It was exciting on one side but really emotional on the other. I stopped pumping at work at about the same time (13 ish months) and my supply tanked too ( I was also pregnant) but we were still able to keep morning and night nursings for a bit. Our morning one was the last one to go and I totally cherished it! 

Married2MrWright

Aw, big hugs! I am feeling conflicted too...I would love to stop pumping (I only do 1x day when I am at work) and just nurse when we're together. She still takes my milk when I am at work and refuses cow's milk. I think I might have to just go cold-turkey so her only choice is the moo juice. My goal is to have her weaned by July since I'll be gone for 5 days for work and there's no way in hell I'll be pumping to keep up my supply. Plus we plan to TTC#2 starting in August and I'd prefer not to be PG and nursing. With that in mind, I had our photog snap a couple (and I do mean 2 only because that's all Libby was down for!) of photos of us nursing as a reminder of this special time in our lives together.

One thing, even though your breasts are not "full" they could be making enough milk to nurse her 2x day. My BFF was PG and still nursed her 18 mo. old 2x day. And lots of mamas manage to do it. So if you still want to keep the AM and PM sessions, it could be possible.

I hear you on missing my "baby"...she's all toddler these days! But I have to remind myself that I am parenting a little person...she was only a baby for short time and will only be a little kid for short time too. And as much as I miss her babyness, I am so excited about the little person she's becoming and her abilities to walk and talk and how fast she's growing and learning. Enjoying these things makes me feel a little less sad. And I am SO glad that I snap tons of pics...I dunno about you, but I am keenly aware that when I do that fleeting moment will be captured to cherish for years to come.

 

lola808

I was sad too, especially since I feel like we didn't have a choice about weaning -- my body just wasn't cutting it anymore and I felt badly that I was probably somewhat starving the poor boy. It was especially sad to give up nighttime and morning nursing. That was about a month ago. He did totally fine, though, so that helped me to feel better. And now he just climbs on me and snuggles up against my chest when he needs comfort to fall asleep, so it's almost the same thing! There's still lots of cuddle time and I still feel like he needs his mama.

I definitely felt like he was growing up really quickly... but I'm sure I'll feel the same way when he reaches many other milestones too. Plus, it's REALLY nice to wear whatever the heck I want now and be free from other nursing responsibilities. Good luck and stay strong!

mrspresley

sanae78:

I worked 3 nights in a row a couple weeks ago and didn't pump and I think that made my supply totally tank.  I'm down to nursing in the am and either before I leave for work or at bedtime.  I never even feel full anymore so I'm pretty sure our nursing days are numbered. 

don't count yourself out just yet.... I normally don't work more than 2 days in a row but last week I worked Mon/Tues/Wed/Thurs and was gone for about 11 hours each time (w/o pumping) and my supply is still good.  I even nursed her less on Friday too b/c I had a few house calls I had to make.  she did nurse a ton on Sat/Sun though, as if to make up for it   I hardly ever feel full anymore... so i don't think that's a good indication of your supply.  I always try to listen/watch closely when she nurses now to make sure she is actually getting milk and not just comfort nursing.

but I know what you mean about feeling sad.... like Sarah said, weaning is so bittersweet.  do what you feel is right for you and K, and if you want to continue nursing in the morning and before bed, then keep doing it

MrsZiz

Married2MrWright:

 I think I might have to just go cold-turkey so her only choice is the moo juice.  

Have you tried the Organic Valley Whole milk? Ryan and Bella drink whole milk (bella is STILL a string bean!) and she gulps that stuff down. Ryan says organic milk is sweeter than non-organic and he says the organic valley tastes the best out of all of the organics that he's tried... just a thought. It is more expensive (around $6.50/gallon) but it's worth it IMO. 

MauiWedding08

  I feel that way sometimes too.  Not pumping has been a huge weight lifted.  But J has noticed a difference.  I use to think he could care less about BFing.  I always had to offer it.  But now that we are down to 2-3 times a day he has really let me know he needs it.  He signs "milk" immediately when I walk through the door of his daycare.  He often randomly comes over and sits in my lap and signs. 

FWIW I am gone 10 hrs/day for work and he sleeps through the night.  I never, ever feel the slightest bit full but he still seems satisfied and I can hear him swallowing.  

Lori - do you have access to any other milk source?  You might want to try goat milk or unhomog. cow milk.  J's little body didn't do well with milk so he's currently on a total dairy elimination diet but he totally sucked down both of those options.  (before his skin broke out and he got sick).  We can buy pasteurized but not homog. milk here and it's sweeter and thicker and from what I have read a little easier to digest.   Goat's milk has a different taste and is even more easy to digest.  Whole foods should carry Mayenberg (or something like that).  It's not our fav after comparing it to a fresh local option, but at least its commonly available.

Married2MrWright

MrsZiz:

Married2MrWright:

 I think I might have to just go cold-turkey so her only choice is the moo juice.  

Have you tried the Organic Valley Whole milk? Ryan and Bella drink whole milk (bella is STILL a string bean!) and she gulps that stuff down. Ryan says organic milk is sweeter than non-organic and he says the organic valley tastes the best out of all of the organics that he's tried... just a thought. It is more expensive (around $6.50/gallon) but it's worth it IMO. 

Funny you should post this but I just bought some yesterday and she drank it today! Hooray! I think I am officially done with pumping! I told J and my mom just to give her cow's milk while I am at work and I'll nurse her when I am home. I am not coming home at lunchtime anymore to nurse her either. That was the one good thing about being gone for 5 days...she's no longer expecting me to be there in the middle of the day. Saves on gas and saves on time...I have been working through lunch which means I can leave at 2:30 p.m. and get home and spend more time with her and feel less frazzled!

mrspresley

MrsZiz:

Have you tried the Organic Valley Whole milk? Ryan and Bella drink whole milk (bella is STILL a string bean!) and she gulps that stuff down. Ryan says organic milk is sweeter than non-organic and he says the organic valley tastes the best out of all of the organics that he's tried... just a thought. It is more expensive (around $6.50/gallon) but it's worth it IMO. 

thanks for this tip! Miss A drinks cow's milk but she doesn't drink a lot... on days that I am gone at work she still only drinks about 3-5 oz on average  lately she has been drinking closer to 5-8 oz while I am gone but I was thinking of trying different brands to see if she preferred one over the other... I'll try Organic Valley next this is perfect timing b/c we are almost out of milk!

SanHawaii08

We're nowhere near weaning, but I think I can empathize with how you're feeling.  We had E sleep in his crib for the first time last night, and while I'm happy to have more room in bed (and hope to be sleeping better again, some day), I was still really sad b/c I feel like he's growing up so quickly!

MrsZiz

mrspresley:

MrsZiz:

Have you tried the Organic Valley Whole milk? Ryan and Bella drink whole milk (bella is STILL a string bean!) and she gulps that stuff down. Ryan says organic milk is sweeter than non-organic and he says the organic valley tastes the best out of all of the organics that he's tried... just a thought. It is more expensive (around $6.50/gallon) but it's worth it IMO. 

thanks for this tip! Miss A drinks cow's milk but she doesn't drink a lot... on days that I am gone at work she still only drinks about 3-5 oz on average  lately she has been drinking closer to 5-8 oz while I am gone but I was thinking of trying different brands to see if she preferred one over the other... I'll try Organic Valley next this is perfect timing b/c we are almost out of milk!

We also use the Roundy's (Pick and Save generic) of the Organic Valley because it's cheaper BUT Ryan says the Organic Valley is best. Bella goes between both without any issues. Hopefully you ladies will have some luck! Bella had never been a great milk drinker but we found the  organic milk coupled with a sippy that has a straw really helped. Now we're using Tommy Tippee's that don't have a straw and she likes them just fine. The straw was the key at first to get her interested though  

inamra

Awww =( I've actually been thinking about the topic of weaning recently since B is creeping up to the big 1 and I was just wondering how long he'd want to nurse *and* how long my body will keep producing milk, esp with the increase of solids that we're doing to put some more weight on the skinny guy =P but it *is* sad for me to even think about it! MH calls me a nursing junkie =P he thinks I'm "addicted" haha...but our LOs are growing fast and I guess it was always just a matter of time anyway when they stop nursing. I'm kinda dreading it though!

sanae78

It seems like I'll be able to keep the morning and night sessions.  I do hear milk when she nurses and actually I worked the last two nights and was pretty engorged on one side by morning.  She definitely doesn't nurse as long anymore, though, so I think she'll be totally okay with not nursing soon.  I'll just keep going until I dry up, I guess. 

On a related note, I still haven't had AF.  4/11 will be 2 years!  Wonder if it won't come back until I wean completely?  I'm totally okay with that.  

Married2MrWright

Sounds like you've found a happy-medium Christine. This thread helped me to realize that I am done with pumping. I haven't pumped since Sunday and Libby's been drinking cow's milk during the day while I am at work. She still will only take 3-4 oz. but that's about what she took of my milk anyway. I came across this page on LLLI and it has helped me feel okay about my decision:

https://www.llli.org/nb/nbsepoct03p183.html

Now, I just need to find a way to tell the adoptive mom I've been donating milk to that I am not going to be able to do it anymore. I am sure she'll understand, she nursed her first daughter until she was 18 months and never pumped. She had mentioned to me during our last visit that they have been giving formula to the baby. She's also close to 6 months and will start solids soon. 

For now, Libby is nursing 3-4 times/day (between 4 p.m. and 4 a.m.) and that's just fine for me.

inamra

sanae78:

On a related note, I still haven't had AF.  4/11 will be 2 years!  Wonder if it won't come back until I wean completely?  I'm totally okay with that.  

YOU are soooo lucky!!! I've had it for a couple of months now and I HATE what it does to my supply! I *never* feel full and can only pump like 1.75-2oz when I'm on AF. But then after AF passes, it comes back up again and I get so happy