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Cloth Diapering
jgilesslp
member
Help! My DH is REALLY not happy about cloth diapering
jgilesslp
member
Cost, environment, better for our child...I cannot convince him. Mainly he doesn't like the mess, the washing, the out and about, etc. I have given him all the answers to this all but he isn't convinced. It is starting to stress me out to the point I am starting to give up the idea. I don't want to though. I really believe in my heart this is the best for our baby. Anyone else have a DH really against it that was able to be convinced? Also, are there really any bad things about cloth diapering?
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Re: Help! My DH is REALLY not happy about cloth diapering
We already have DS #1 and I mentioned the blowouts he had...he said he would rather deal with that once in a while then washing the mess of cloth all the time.
Regarding the chemicals, I mentioned that. DS #1 had major adhesion issues (removals 5 times before re-circumcision...3 months since that and hoping we are finally done). I told him I swear the diapers were irritating and adding to his issues. DH says I can't prove that. Sigh..
I shower my FI how cute they were and he was sold instantly. I told him I would do all the laundry. The only difference between the whole process really is that instead of bringing the diaper pail out to the trash, you bring it into the laundry. It took a couple weeks but as soon as I started showing him what they looked like he 'got it' more.
ETA: Also, when I told him how much money it was going to save us he started wondering why CD's weren't the norm.
<a href="http://s844.photobucket.com/albums/ab4/mrsskelton/?action=view
I have not started cloth diapering so I don't know if it will be different when we actually start. However, I didn't have to convince DH. I showed him the cost difference, let him pick out a few CD'S that were his style, like camo, skulls, etc.... and he is on board. Now when the dirty diaper part comes into play I don't know how he will feel. He works at a high school though and will see a lot nastier stuff than a poopy diaper from our son, so maybe that helps. I suppose if I just make sure I keep it flowing well, the laundry done and he sees I'm fine he will be fine.
GL and I hope he comes around. At the end of the day, if you really want to do this, tell him he can stop changing diapers and you handle them all.
ETA: It also may be easier for me to have DH on board because he doesn't touch one piece of laundry at all. But then again I never cook, so it's a fair trade
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DH was neither here nor there about it. He pretty much told me to do what I wanted to do. It's taken him a long time to actually use any CDs, mostly because I have a bunch of different types and he doesn't want to take the time to figure out fitteds vs pockets vs snaps, etc. That being said, I do maybe 95-99% of the diapering, so it didn't really matter to me how he felt. I can say that he doesn't have any of the typical DH issues about CDing--he'll happily dump solid poo in a toilet, he doesn't care that we put poopy diapers in the washer, stink has never been an issue, etc.
What are his specific concerns? What does he think is messy about them, or any more washing than your typical load of baby laundry? Would he be willing to CD at home if you had the option of disposables when out and about?
This. If laundry's his big sticking point, then you do the laundry.
I don't really think they're any more work when out and about, either. Sure you carry the dirty one, but if you had to change and were nowhere near a garbage can what would you do? Wait? Throw it out the window? No, you'd wind up taking it with you. It's no worse (and, I think, better - disposables reek compared to CDs) to use cloth.
DH didn't really have a say in the matter. I started to CD when DS was 2 months old. DH was in Afghanistan at the time so when he came home we were using full on cloth. He had about 2 weeks of using sposies while we were moving and getting our laundry set up but then it was back to cloth. He loves CD's and hates sposies.
I buy. I do laundry. He does change but his preferances have changed. He likes fitteds more then the BG and FB.
If he didn't want to use CD's then oh well. I'd still CD and change all the diapers.
This
Why not just plan on using disposibles those first 4 or 5 weeks by then you should be all healed up and able to do the diapers. I would say order a diaper trial for jillians drawers after that to try for a few weeks to show him that it isnt as bad as he thinks it will be. And if he's still not convinced and you dont think you can keep it up on your own or dont want to fight him about it anymore then at least you are only out 10 bucks vs. the cost of a bunch of diapers. GL! My DH was very hesitant about it but he doesnt really say much one way or the other anymore about it.
If he is REALLY that opposed, can't he carry it downstairs, you put it in the washer, he carries it back upstairs, you fold it, etc.?
I dunno, my DH was totally, totally, totally against it. Because I do tend to get behind on laundry, he envisioned piles of dirty diapers everywhere. I did a good job of doing our regular laundry for 2 months (at his request), and went ahead and ordered a CD trial. He was PISSED! I left disposables on the changing table and told him he was completely free to use them as much as he wanted, but I was going to use cloth when I changed diapers. It took him a long time (months!), but he came around, and is now the biggest cloth diaper advocate you'll ever meet.
Mommy to DD1 (June 2007), DS (January 2010), DD2 (July 2012), and The Next One (EDD 3/31/2015)
if he's not going to be all hands on with it anyway, then what does it matter?
i didn't discuss with dh beforehand actually. cd's just showed up in my house when i ordered them. i showed him real quick and gave him a run down. no questions asked... you know why? because he knows that i'm washing and changing all day. he does the changing too obviously, but since they weren't all that complicated to use, it was no big deal for him. ESPECIALLY when he realized i wasn't spending $20/week on disposables.
however... when he changes a cloth, he just leaves it on top of the washer, he doesn't even toss it in the dirty bin, which is fine with me. i buy one small bag of sposies a month and leave them out so if for some reason he doesn't feel like throwing on a cd he can do that.
but he got the hang of it... he even diaper sprayed a NASTY runny dipe that he changed. he'll plop poop in the toilet now and i was a little surprised to actually see dd in a cd when he had to change her while i was at the store.
there is probably SOME room for compromise there on both sides, but it sounds like you'll just have to ask him what it is.
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This and I change most of the diapers anyways, good luck.?
It took some time to convince DH, because he didn't love the idea of paying a few hundred dollars up front, but now he's totally on board. When people say negative things to me about our decision to CD, he comes back with comments like, "They're just ignorant and don't realize what CDing involves these days."
I love my DH.
BFP #1 9/7/10, EDD 5/14/11, Violet born 5/27/11.
BFP #2 4/9/12, EDD 12/16/12, M/C Rory 4/24/12.
BFP #3 10/6/12, EDD 6/16/12., Matilda born 6/17/13.
My DH travels a lot for work. I made the decision and he went with it. Once I explained how much money we would save, the fact that there was no diaper trash for him to worry with and, and that the diapers we just as easy to put on and take off as sposies he was on board. The only thing that he doesn't do is rinse the diaper off now that DS is on solids. I ask him to put the poopy diapers on the back of the toilet and let me know so I can deal with them.
In my experience with men, they are more hands on learners. Once you show him how easy it really is and the fact that if you do the laundry there is less work for them then if DC was in sposies he will come the the CD side of the world.