Work dilemma

marissajane82

So, I work as a behavioral therapist with kids on the autism spectrum. I am newly pregnant and havent told work yet. However, one of my kids is having a rougher time lately and has become aggressive. Since finding out I was pregnant, I've had 3 aggressive instances towards me, 2 where he kicked me in the stomach and 1 that involving hard hitting. Its way too early to tell work, but I'm getting nervous about this situation. I dont want them to think I'm giving up on the kid, but should I ask to be removed from this team for the safety of my baby? They could easily put anothertherapist on the team, but I dont want to look like a quitter. Its making me really uneasy. I feel like I am not doing my job well enough because I"m not allowing myself to intervene in tough situations, for fear of getting aggressed. But telling would mean the gossip mill might start at work pretty quick. Thoughts?

jessaug6

Be honest with work. Tell them you are expecting, the child is being very aggressive, and you're afraid a strong blow to the stomach could hurt your child! If at all possible, ask if you could have a helper or something! Idk if you can do that or not! lol

You would not be a quiter! You are looking out for the safety of your child!

MissMommyMac

I would definitely be honest with your work! I don't work with kids, but I'm staying with my mom right now and my step dad, plus my two younger siblings have Aspergers syndrome and it's really stressful to be around them.  Your work should know you're pg because they may have to put that kid with someone different, because the stress and the physical agression are not good for you and your LO.

Enami

Tell them! Who cares about gossip when you're worried for your baby? My brother has a church friend that has some form of Autism, along with other issues (they think FAS, but are not sure since he's adopted). I was home at my parent's this weekend, and this kid was over, and tried punching me in the stomach because I took his nerf gun away for shooting me with it. I just about punched him in the face. I don't like ill behaved kids at all, and I know he has issues, but when my parents got home I told them if that kid comes over any other time when I'm visiting during this pregnancy, I will not be the only adult in this house with them. These are 9yos, btw. I'm not getting kicked or hit in the tummy by some kid who's not doing well in therapy, my baby is way more important than that.

love_melongtime

You definitely need to be honest with work about your situation. They will surely understand.

colliebabe

My sister works in a school for children with behavioral problems (she gets kicked, hit, bitten and gets her hair pulled all the time - the kids are five.)  Her aid (student support) worked all through her pregnancy but from the beginning she did not participate in situations where students were overly aggressive.  They made a lot of accommodations for her, especially when her belly got big and she could no longer put the students in child control positions. I hope your work does the same for you! 

PS - People who work in this field are amazing to me!  I teach high school, but I mostly work with regular ed students.

beachgirl24

jessaug6:

Be honest with work. Tell them you are expecting, the child is being very aggressive, and you're afraid a strong blow to the stomach could hurt your child! If at all possible, ask if you could have a helper or something! Idk if you can do that or not! lol

You would not be a quiter! You are looking out for the safety of your child!

 This!  

marissajane82

Thanks Ladies. I feel a lot better now. I have a meeting with my caseload manager next week and plan on talking to her about this. I appreciate all the suppport!

Enami

CDK1:

Enami:

Tell them! Who cares about gossip when you're worried for your baby? My brother has a church friend that has some form of Autism, along with other issues (they think FAS, but are not sure since he's adopted). I was home at my parent's this weekend, and this kid was over, and tried punching me in the stomach because I took his nerf gun away for shooting me with it. I just about punched him in the face. I don't like ill behaved kids at all, and I know he has issues, but when my parents got home I told them if that kid comes over any other time when I'm visiting during this pregnancy, I will not be the only adult in this house with them. These are 9yos, btw. I'm not getting kicked or hit in the tummy by some kid who's not doing well in therapy, my baby is way more important than that.

Do some research, these aren't "ill behaved kids" they have SERIOUS issues they are learning to deal with. They don't understand like you or I would. It's not that he's "not doing well in therapy" He has a lifetime of struggles ahead of him. You can not expect somebody on the autism spectrum to behave like an average child their age. He probably didn't understand why you took HIS gun away. For HIS safety you shouldn't be left alone with him. This was an ignorant post.

Edited: wording

 

To me, being violent is ill behaved, no matter your issues. I'm pretty sure he knows why I took his gun. He is not severely autistic at all, he talks fine, he interacts fine, he just gets mad when he doesn't get his way. And, no, he really isn't doing well in therapy, I've spoken with his parents who are friends of my parents. He's 9, he was adopted as an infant, he's been getting the help he needs the entire time. My 5 yo cousin has Aspergers and he has never been violent. I understand he has issues, I am not one to deal with them. I get what your saying, up until your whole "for HIS safety" remark. Wow, just because I don't work with/interact with these types of kids or really have any experrience dealing with them, I'm now detrimental to his heath? Sorry we can't all be perfect like you. Maybe get off your high horse and realize some of us just can't/don't know how to/never been trained to handle that sort of thing. Thanks for being so understanding of the different types of people in the world and the different types of reactions we all have.

 

Oh, and btw, this kid goes to a regular elementary school and is in regular classes. Not special ed. His occupational and psychological therapy is outside of school.