I feel lost -- advice on placement for IEP, please?

Bride2bMO

I'll try to be brief, but quickly recap. We've been in EI for 1 year. My son has qualified for special education services but the placement they are recommending is NOT what we anticipated. They recommend community/private preschool with itinerant services in the classroom (proposed per week: 60 min specialized instruction focusing on social/emotional, 45 min OT, and 30 min speech (trying to bump up the speech).

Until very recently, we had no idea this private preschool recommendation was a possibility. Even before we identified his issues, we always wanted him to go to the districts ECC for preschool. We love the inclusion model even before we realized he might not be on the typical peer side. (each classroom is 6 and 6) We've been on that waiting list 1.5 years. 

We are now scrambling to evaluate the only 2 private schools that are an option (the rest are run by churches and the SPED staff is NOT allowed to visit him in the classroom there, per separation of church/state rules. Lame). Not surprisingly, it's late in the game and all the preferable slots are gone (we want MWF mornings, ideal for him).

I get such mixed advice, the decision-makers are saying that the private/mainstream classes would be the least restrictive environment, and I understand that...however, I just spent Saturday at a bowling party with an inclusion class from another district. I couldn't tell who was who, except for one, and I actually teared up to see how much her friends loved and "fussed" over her to help her bowl. These were 4 year olds. My heart tells me if it's good enough for the "typical" developing students, it's good enough for DS.

He qualifies under the vague catch-all: Young Child with Developmental Delay. He has a speech delay and scored 2 standard deviations below normal on social/emotional behavior. Basically, he has speech delay, probably SPD (including major picky eating, trouble transitioning, trouble self-regulationg) and is very withdrawn - rarely or never speaks to other children even though he's become quite a chatterbox with immediate family and therapists.

So -- I am lost, I've been soul-searching for days, I don't know the answer. To make do with trying private (probably in an afternoon T/W/TH mixed age setting 3 - 5 year olds) or whether to try to insist on the public Early Childhood Center. 

Also, the two private schools say they require potty-training. The SPED teacher who led the IEP meeting says that it's not firm, even though the schools say it is.

Any advice? I would really, really appreciate it. I don't know what he needs, I just want the best for him, and don't want to be pushed into the wrong choice for the wrong reasons (like space/budget issues, though the district would unlikely ever admit that). They claim they truly have his interests at heart, and want to try mainstreaming him. 

Bride2bMO

p.s. - he's been in a "kids day out" for almost a year, doesn't do great there. Doesn't interact. Receives most of his current services at home, with some school visits.

mommyof4boys

If the district is suggesting a placement it should be on them to find one furthermore if he's a child with a special need the potty training should be null and void.  Here it's on the school district to find placement and pay for the placement.

nictel

I don't have a lot of advice, but I can certainly offer support.  I am in a similar situation, although mine hasn't been totally decided yet.  About 7 months ago, when my son first started getting speech services at 23 months, he had almost no speech.  My EI coordinator told me it was possible that he would likely get a placement in an integrated class at the local developmental preschool when he turned 3,  (If at that point he still had minimal speech a self-contained placement was possible but unlikely since he had no other issues except expressive speech.)  Well, as the year went on and he started making significant process I was told that a spot in an integrated class was 50-50.  Fast forward to being told that it would be very unlikely for him to accpeted intot he developmental preschool, but he might be eligible for a SEIT at a typical preschool  Fast forward to last week being told that a SEIT is very unlikely, and that chances are he'll go to a typical preschool with speech services at home. 

As in your case, I am now scrambling to find a typical preschool that I am comfortable with.  I haven't had my meeting with my school district yet (this is all coming from my EI providers) but basically have been told with his scores, a developmental preschool just won't happen.  I'm torn...part of me is thrilled at his progress, and glad to be leaving some of the special needs world behind (at least for now), but part of me is afraid that he's not ready, and is being set up to fail. 

I wish I had advice...just wanted to let you know that there are a bunch of us out there in your situation.

thefuturemrskudla

Hi,

My thought is to "fight" for the inclusion class.  Off the top of my head, I'd focus on these things (and remember, "least restrictive" is a goal but it does not mean accepting a worse fit):

-He has a social goal in his IEP (this is huge).  Seems there are more meaningful opportunities for him to socialize in the inclusion school, where there is probably a lesser ratio of teachers to students, more experience handling verbal delay, and less kids (did you say he tends to isolate in larger groups).

-Re speech delay: does he sign at all? does the inclusion school include sign in the curriculum?

-Also, would he be the only kid in the prvate school not potty trained?  Even if the schools could be convinved to accept him w/o being so trained, that can be stigmatizing for him among his peers.  Also, I doubt the school can be convinced due to potential liability issues.  If the idea of a dedicated aid is mentioned to remedy this, object that doing this would be very restrictive for you child in terms of relating to his peers, preventing natural socialization, etc.

 

JenGK

-auntie-:

I have never heard the concept of an aide not being "allowed" into a classroom of a church sponsored preschool. Ever. Is the school telling you this or is this coming from your IEP coordinator?

Because most districts do not sponsor preschool for non-IEP kids, a neighborhood religious sponsored preschool is considered "LRE" for this age group. I know of people fighting to get LRE rather than a SPED classroom for that reason. I know a number of kids locally who have had services pushed into our local parish RC and reform synagogue preschools. In many places the JCCs are ahead of the herd in coordinating excellent preschool settings for all kinds of kids.

Ditto this.  I have never heard of a services being denied because of the religious affiliation of the school/center.  I'd push back hard on that.  In my mind, it's actually discriminatory of them to deny services to a kid attending such a school.

Bride2bMO

I was really surprised by the religious thing, too. That info is coming from his IEP case manager, who is also the Special Education Teacher who will be administering his social/emotional specialized instruction. She is saying that even though she thinks it's really silly, the rules prevent her from providing him services IN the religious class setting. She could pull him out, to a room without any religious symbols, but for her to work on his goals she needs to come into his regular classroom. 

Interestingly, the two private schools we are considering are actually inside of church buildings. Such-and-such-METHODIST-preschool, etc. But they are considered independent because they have their own board of directors and are not technically run by their church, as the rest are. So they are allowed to provide him services there.

The only options I'm even aware of are the 1 public, the various church schools including the two quasi-independent ones, and then Montessori (which everyone who knows him feels this would really be a poor choice for his needs). 

I appreciate everyone's perspective. DH and I spent 2 hours talking last night and making pros and cons list for each option, and the ONLY con for the public school is the case manager's claim that the 50/50 mix of SN and typical would hinder him. We are trying to understand exactly how it would hinder him. 6 typical kids seems like plenty for him to observe for language/social/etc. And are they afraid he would pick up so-called negative behavior from the other SN kids? I feel like everyone is trying to discuss things delicately.  Are they worried about him seeing aggressive behavior? Or just meltdowns, yelling, etc.? Because he already knows how to do all of that, ha ha.

Thanks for your thoughts, I may check back in. Next on my list is to get the truth about the PTing issue from the school directors. I want them to be honest, if he is still 100% reliant on diapers (as he is now - never had a single success on the potty) will he be allowed to attend and how much will that inconvenience the teacher and the flow of the class?